WWE Summerslam '06

1. Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero - 4
2. Sabu vs. Big Show - 2
3. Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan - 3
4. Ric Flair vs. Mick Foley - I Quit Match - 7
5. Booker T vs. Batista - 3
6. Degeneration X vs. Vince and Shane McMahon - 3
7. John Cena vs. Edge - 5

One of WWE’s biggest pay-per-views of the year didn’t live up to its spectacular hype. On paper, it showcased a lot of big matches; but in reality, with a less than enthusiastic audience and some sub par performances, it was largely a disappointment. Rey and Chavo wasn’t bad throughout most of its duration, with the exception being Chavo’s occasional nonexistent selling of Rey’s offense. It was marred by interference, which furthered a disgraceful storyline that’s profiting over a dead man’s legacy. Sabu and Big Show was so unbelievably sloppy and one of the biggest insults to hardcore wrestling I’ve yet to see with my own eyes. Sabu recklessly went from one botched spot to the next, not giving credibility to any of them. Their finish was ruined by poor execution, as Sabu clumsily ruined what could have been an interesting table spot, and was then subsequently slammed through a second table in lackadaisical fashion.

Hogan’s hobbled attempts at wrestling didn’t satisfy me. What little selling or psychology featured in this tiresome bout was too over-the-top to be even halfway plausible. Hogan was in no condition to work, and Orton’s certainly not yet talented enough to carry such a load on his young shoulders. Flair and Foley was barbaric, and while the action and pacing were void of logic and downright questionable at times, you still have to applaud both men for so savagely brutalizing each other for our entertainment. At this point in their respective careers, neither needs to subject themselves to such torture, but did so willingly in easily the most memorable match on the show. Flair looked more like a bulletin board than a human, after landing in thousands of thumbtacks; Foley also took his share of punishment, bleeding profusely from his head, chest, and arm.

Booker T and Batista was a downright awful match. Not even the experienced Booker could save this heaping pile of feces. Batista looked foolishly amateur here, especially when he nearly dropped Booker during a post-match powerbomb. The DX and McMahon angle-heavy bout featured nearly a dozen run-ins, which automatically leads me to suggest ignoring any urges of ever seeing it. Vince looked especially lethargic, even making a double-clothesline seem like too much work for him to handle. The main event wasn’t especially memorable, which is what hurt it most, being that it was a main event of a major show. It lacked the intensity and energy that could have catapulted it into the realm of worthwhile, but instead stayed muddled in mediocrity. The crowd finally came alive near the end – and the finish, seeing Cena carry both Edge and Lita on his shoulders, only to have Edge escape and cheat to secure a victory after a nasty shot to the back of Cena’s head while wearing brass knuckles, was admittedly kind of cool. This wasn’t bad, but I feel the two of them have a really solid twenty-minute match in them, we just haven’t seen it yet.