CM Punk vs. Kane - ECW on SyFy 6/3/08 - 4
Punk was in a four-way earlier in the same show. Probably of all the former WWE champions these are the two with the most tepid offense. Kane did like a reverse neckhang spot that looked kind of cool and barbaric. Big boot landed square in the face knocking Punk through the ropes to the floor -- he'll probably think his nightly Pepsi tastes like a Crystal Clear after eating that shot. Kane's dropkick to a seated opponent is about a 4.7 on the Konnan scale. Body-scissors hold actually looks visually painful due to Kane's size and not a resthold. I miss this chunkier Punk. Easily to buy him hanging with the big guys than today with his Teen Wolf sideburns and zip-up hoodies borrowed from his nephew's closet. Okay, maybe I was rough on Kane, he's got better looking offense than other champs Foley, RVD, Sid, and Swagger, but he's still behind Lashley, no dice for CM as I saw better kicks in kids karate class at the YMCA in '90 than Punk's. Punk slides out of a chokeslam, tries the G2S but plays up being too banged up, then Kane retained the ECW title with a chokeslam. Better than I expected but as ECW world title reigns go Kane's was no Ezekiel Jackson's.
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Saturday, December 28, 2013
Rockstar Pro Wrestling "Kool Kat Christmas" iPPV - 12/13/2013
Rockstar Pro Wrestling “Kool Kat Christmas”
12/13/2013
Rockstar Pro Arena - Dayton, OH
Rockstar Pro is a company that runs every Wednesday out of Dayton, Ohio and features old HWA stalwarts such as Cody Hawk, Ron Mathis, Aaron Williams, Benjamin Kimera, Ganger, and The Crist Brothers among others … so basically, the majority of the HWA roster from 2006. Apparently this show was a free iPPV … free as in it was free to watch not free to get into the building. By the way, who came up with the name “Kool Kat Christmas”? Sounds like it should be the name of a live music night at a hipster bar, not a wrestling show. Enough rambling, lets FIGHT~!
1. Cody Hawk vs. Andrew Stryker - 2
According to the announcers, this is ten years in the making. This Stryker kid was probably in high school ten years ago. What, did Cody Hawk come into science class one day and throw this kid into a bunch of beakers and bunson burners? Ok, well apparently he’s Matt Stryker’s kid and this is a continuation of the Hawk/Matt Stryker feud from HWA years back. That makes more sense then. Five minutes in and Stryker looks like he’s just completely blown up. Stryker hit a nice Kurt Angle-style superplex from the top rope. I’ve never been a the world’s biggest Cody Hawk fan and this is just another reason why. His work is lazy and exhibits no emotion whatsoever. Fuck, Hawk’s muscle buster finisher was just horrible. This felt like a match you would probably see during a training class.
2. The Squad (Tom McClane & Matt Brannigan) vs. “Dirty” Miguel Sanchez & Austin Bradley - 3
Good lord, this MUST be 2006 as Brock Guffman is managing the heel team of The Squad. Sanchez is supposedly from Tijuana. I’ll believe that when I see his green card as I call bullshit on that. Bradley seems to have the basics down but doesn’t really have a discernable look. Double closthesline spot from Bradley was pretty bad and the hot tag to Sanchez was more lukewarm than anything. McClane’s nickname is supposedly “Die Hard” so I’ll let you insert your own Bruce Willis/Die Hard joke here. Tag work from The Squad looked a little disjointed in spots and the finishing spot culminating with Branningan getting a pin with a reverse lung blower was super sloppy.
3. Kyle Maverick vs. G-Force - 1
G-Force looks like Delirious if he was ten years older and tattooed all to hell. Enziguri spot from Maverick missed completely and looked as if they got lost for a minute. G-Force’s tornado DDT was more of a stiff breeze DDT. Maverick supposedly has a background in MMA. His kicks looked awful and so did his punches. This was just awful and lacked anything anywhere near notable.
4. The Dirty South (Pompano Joe & Trice) vs. The Rookies (Brandon James & Mason Price) - 4
Pompano Joe was the last guy I thought I would see on this show but it’s welcome. Last time I saw Trice, he was rocking some Spiderman tights while getting ripped apart by Dan Severn about two years ago in a shady skating rink. This James dude seems pretty competent but I'm not sure that I trust a man whose nickname is "Honey Badger". Nice leg lariat by Pompano Joe on James. Hot tag to Price and he comes in with some fire and attitude. His running knees in the corner weren’t half bad. Damn, Trice and Joe caught Price coming off the top rope in a powerbomb spot and then just dropped him face first right on the mat. That’ll ruin anybody’s night. Bonus points for this for being the best match on the show thus far.
5. Five Way Sudden Death Match: Dave Crist vs. Jake Crist vs. Ron Mathis vs. Matt Taylor vs. Lil’ C - 5
Five minutes in and we get Lil’ C running in and the ring announcer randomly declaring him a legal participant. I suppose in some weird, convoluted way that makes sense. Big dive sequence followed with more action than I could keep up with. Mathis did a big dive from the top rope to the floor and the Crists did a big double dive to the floor. This has turned into a big five man free-for-all, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing as it’s kept the pace quick with little down time. That though can be a bad thing because if you move right onto the next move before letting the previous one sink in, it defeats the effect of the prior move. The random “O-I-4-K” chants are getting a little annoying. The solo section with the Crist brothers fighting each other was good. What the hell was that? Some weird Canadian destroyer looking move from the top rope looked like it just wrecked both guys. Taylor looks to have improved a hell of a lot from the last time I saw him in HWA about three years ago. He’s got more aggressiveness and his offensive looks much, much crisper. Finish seemed to come from out of nowhere on a simple kick to the face. Nice to see Taylor getting the win and a title shot as he’s been around the Southwest Ohio area forever.
6. The Man Simply Known as Michael, C.W. Scott, & Big Jim Hutchinson vs. Jeremy Madrox, Jon Murray, & Bruce Gray - 4
Madrox has been MIA, at least from what I’ve seen, in the local area for a while. Nice to see that he’s resurfaced. I always liked his old-timey boxer character. The only time I remember seeing Big Jim was in the opener at an HWA show in Dayton in December of 2003 and he wasn’t very good. I had no clue he was still wrestling. Did I seriously just hear the announcers reference “Ready to Rumble” on commentary? Big Jim just destroyed Gray with a big boot. I’ve seen Murray around HWA a few times, wasn’t a big fan of his work as he looked like a poor man’s Mick Foley and not very funny, despite his best efforts to do comedy. The heel team here looked pretty good with Big Jim especially looking surprisingly good and helping to carry the load quite well. A random Ron Mathis run in? Ok, sure, why not. Murray and Madrox come in and throw some clubbing blows. Madrox I don’t thing was ever tagged in legally which makes me sad. Match was decent and things seem to be getting progressively better on this show.
7. Best of Seven Series Final: Nate Wings vs. Alex Colon - 5
Did the ring announcer really just announce Wings at 114 pounds? He looks like he weighs less than 100 pounds soaking wet. Action has been pretty fast and furious thus far with Wings busting out a couple of dives. Nice snap superplex from the top rope by Colon. Im impressed that they’be been able to keep up a breakneck pace for the amount of time the match has been going. German suplex by Colon nearly snapped Wings in half. Wings hit an awesome spike DDT right on the ring apron that probably could have jammed Colon’s next something awful. Colon just absolutely destroyed Wings with a powerbomb into the side of the ring and then proceeded to hit a brainbuster right on top of the turnbuckle. Two really awesome moves but Wings went right into his comeback after taking them. Nose-to-nose spot and the lights go out leading me to believe they forgot to pay the electric bill. Lights come back on and there are two random dudes in masks in the ring beating the shit out of Colon and Wings. Match was going good and staring to pick up until this nonsense. Probably would have gotten to the recommended category just for the three big moves but the end just ruined it.
8. Ganger vs. The Great American Beast - 4
Big brawl to start with these two just laying into each other, Beast slamming Ganger on the floor and delivering a Cactus Jack elbow from the apron. Ganger then countered with a t-bone suplex on the floor and then another into the ring post. Beast is one seriously hairy dude. Just think of a younger version of Albert about five inches shorter and you’ll get the idea. Some good nearfalls here, especially one off a Samoan Drop that Beast hit from the top rope. Ganger has improved ten times since I remember seeing him do a Shrek gimmick in HWA where he lost a match and had to wear a Shrek mask. Beast won with a nice armbar that would make Ronda Rousey pround. Two big dudes just pounding on each other, I enjoyed this.
9. Rockstar Pro Championship: Benjamin Kimera vs. Aaron Williams - 3
The ring announcer channeled his best Bruce Buffer and introduced this like a big match. However, it lost a lot of luster as soon as it started as the match quickly slowed. Williams did some stalling early and worked over Kimera’s neck with a cravat lock. Williams is being touted as the “baddest man alive”. I’m sure Anderson Silva or Georges St. Pierre would like to have something to say about that. Couple of boring chants from the crowd. Yeah, mat work for what is supposedly a heated grudge match for the top belt in the promotion really wouldn’t do it for me either. We’re about ten minutes in, the mat work and rest holds have gone nowhere, and I’m beginning to wonder if that’s all these guys are going to do. Kimera hits a urinage slam and then blatanly rips off C.M. Punk and applies the Anaconda Vice. Finally, we get some action going with Williams hitting an Ace Crusher of all things, Kimera hitting a pretty vicious spinebuster, and Williams hitting a picture perfect frog-splash. Ref bump for no discernable reason. Not sure why we needed that but OK. Ref wakes up, counts a nearfall, and gets squished in the corner again as a bunch of dudes in black hoodies in jeans look to interfere. Sloppy roll-up mercifully ends this.
Good thing this show was free because I would not have plunked down $15 to see it otherwise.
12/13/2013
Rockstar Pro Arena - Dayton, OH
Rockstar Pro is a company that runs every Wednesday out of Dayton, Ohio and features old HWA stalwarts such as Cody Hawk, Ron Mathis, Aaron Williams, Benjamin Kimera, Ganger, and The Crist Brothers among others … so basically, the majority of the HWA roster from 2006. Apparently this show was a free iPPV … free as in it was free to watch not free to get into the building. By the way, who came up with the name “Kool Kat Christmas”? Sounds like it should be the name of a live music night at a hipster bar, not a wrestling show. Enough rambling, lets FIGHT~!
1. Cody Hawk vs. Andrew Stryker - 2
According to the announcers, this is ten years in the making. This Stryker kid was probably in high school ten years ago. What, did Cody Hawk come into science class one day and throw this kid into a bunch of beakers and bunson burners? Ok, well apparently he’s Matt Stryker’s kid and this is a continuation of the Hawk/Matt Stryker feud from HWA years back. That makes more sense then. Five minutes in and Stryker looks like he’s just completely blown up. Stryker hit a nice Kurt Angle-style superplex from the top rope. I’ve never been a the world’s biggest Cody Hawk fan and this is just another reason why. His work is lazy and exhibits no emotion whatsoever. Fuck, Hawk’s muscle buster finisher was just horrible. This felt like a match you would probably see during a training class.
2. The Squad (Tom McClane & Matt Brannigan) vs. “Dirty” Miguel Sanchez & Austin Bradley - 3
Good lord, this MUST be 2006 as Brock Guffman is managing the heel team of The Squad. Sanchez is supposedly from Tijuana. I’ll believe that when I see his green card as I call bullshit on that. Bradley seems to have the basics down but doesn’t really have a discernable look. Double closthesline spot from Bradley was pretty bad and the hot tag to Sanchez was more lukewarm than anything. McClane’s nickname is supposedly “Die Hard” so I’ll let you insert your own Bruce Willis/Die Hard joke here. Tag work from The Squad looked a little disjointed in spots and the finishing spot culminating with Branningan getting a pin with a reverse lung blower was super sloppy.
3. Kyle Maverick vs. G-Force - 1
G-Force looks like Delirious if he was ten years older and tattooed all to hell. Enziguri spot from Maverick missed completely and looked as if they got lost for a minute. G-Force’s tornado DDT was more of a stiff breeze DDT. Maverick supposedly has a background in MMA. His kicks looked awful and so did his punches. This was just awful and lacked anything anywhere near notable.
4. The Dirty South (Pompano Joe & Trice) vs. The Rookies (Brandon James & Mason Price) - 4
Pompano Joe was the last guy I thought I would see on this show but it’s welcome. Last time I saw Trice, he was rocking some Spiderman tights while getting ripped apart by Dan Severn about two years ago in a shady skating rink. This James dude seems pretty competent but I'm not sure that I trust a man whose nickname is "Honey Badger". Nice leg lariat by Pompano Joe on James. Hot tag to Price and he comes in with some fire and attitude. His running knees in the corner weren’t half bad. Damn, Trice and Joe caught Price coming off the top rope in a powerbomb spot and then just dropped him face first right on the mat. That’ll ruin anybody’s night. Bonus points for this for being the best match on the show thus far.
5. Five Way Sudden Death Match: Dave Crist vs. Jake Crist vs. Ron Mathis vs. Matt Taylor vs. Lil’ C - 5
Five minutes in and we get Lil’ C running in and the ring announcer randomly declaring him a legal participant. I suppose in some weird, convoluted way that makes sense. Big dive sequence followed with more action than I could keep up with. Mathis did a big dive from the top rope to the floor and the Crists did a big double dive to the floor. This has turned into a big five man free-for-all, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing as it’s kept the pace quick with little down time. That though can be a bad thing because if you move right onto the next move before letting the previous one sink in, it defeats the effect of the prior move. The random “O-I-4-K” chants are getting a little annoying. The solo section with the Crist brothers fighting each other was good. What the hell was that? Some weird Canadian destroyer looking move from the top rope looked like it just wrecked both guys. Taylor looks to have improved a hell of a lot from the last time I saw him in HWA about three years ago. He’s got more aggressiveness and his offensive looks much, much crisper. Finish seemed to come from out of nowhere on a simple kick to the face. Nice to see Taylor getting the win and a title shot as he’s been around the Southwest Ohio area forever.
6. The Man Simply Known as Michael, C.W. Scott, & Big Jim Hutchinson vs. Jeremy Madrox, Jon Murray, & Bruce Gray - 4
Madrox has been MIA, at least from what I’ve seen, in the local area for a while. Nice to see that he’s resurfaced. I always liked his old-timey boxer character. The only time I remember seeing Big Jim was in the opener at an HWA show in Dayton in December of 2003 and he wasn’t very good. I had no clue he was still wrestling. Did I seriously just hear the announcers reference “Ready to Rumble” on commentary? Big Jim just destroyed Gray with a big boot. I’ve seen Murray around HWA a few times, wasn’t a big fan of his work as he looked like a poor man’s Mick Foley and not very funny, despite his best efforts to do comedy. The heel team here looked pretty good with Big Jim especially looking surprisingly good and helping to carry the load quite well. A random Ron Mathis run in? Ok, sure, why not. Murray and Madrox come in and throw some clubbing blows. Madrox I don’t thing was ever tagged in legally which makes me sad. Match was decent and things seem to be getting progressively better on this show.
7. Best of Seven Series Final: Nate Wings vs. Alex Colon - 5
Did the ring announcer really just announce Wings at 114 pounds? He looks like he weighs less than 100 pounds soaking wet. Action has been pretty fast and furious thus far with Wings busting out a couple of dives. Nice snap superplex from the top rope by Colon. Im impressed that they’be been able to keep up a breakneck pace for the amount of time the match has been going. German suplex by Colon nearly snapped Wings in half. Wings hit an awesome spike DDT right on the ring apron that probably could have jammed Colon’s next something awful. Colon just absolutely destroyed Wings with a powerbomb into the side of the ring and then proceeded to hit a brainbuster right on top of the turnbuckle. Two really awesome moves but Wings went right into his comeback after taking them. Nose-to-nose spot and the lights go out leading me to believe they forgot to pay the electric bill. Lights come back on and there are two random dudes in masks in the ring beating the shit out of Colon and Wings. Match was going good and staring to pick up until this nonsense. Probably would have gotten to the recommended category just for the three big moves but the end just ruined it.
8. Ganger vs. The Great American Beast - 4
Big brawl to start with these two just laying into each other, Beast slamming Ganger on the floor and delivering a Cactus Jack elbow from the apron. Ganger then countered with a t-bone suplex on the floor and then another into the ring post. Beast is one seriously hairy dude. Just think of a younger version of Albert about five inches shorter and you’ll get the idea. Some good nearfalls here, especially one off a Samoan Drop that Beast hit from the top rope. Ganger has improved ten times since I remember seeing him do a Shrek gimmick in HWA where he lost a match and had to wear a Shrek mask. Beast won with a nice armbar that would make Ronda Rousey pround. Two big dudes just pounding on each other, I enjoyed this.
9. Rockstar Pro Championship: Benjamin Kimera vs. Aaron Williams - 3
The ring announcer channeled his best Bruce Buffer and introduced this like a big match. However, it lost a lot of luster as soon as it started as the match quickly slowed. Williams did some stalling early and worked over Kimera’s neck with a cravat lock. Williams is being touted as the “baddest man alive”. I’m sure Anderson Silva or Georges St. Pierre would like to have something to say about that. Couple of boring chants from the crowd. Yeah, mat work for what is supposedly a heated grudge match for the top belt in the promotion really wouldn’t do it for me either. We’re about ten minutes in, the mat work and rest holds have gone nowhere, and I’m beginning to wonder if that’s all these guys are going to do. Kimera hits a urinage slam and then blatanly rips off C.M. Punk and applies the Anaconda Vice. Finally, we get some action going with Williams hitting an Ace Crusher of all things, Kimera hitting a pretty vicious spinebuster, and Williams hitting a picture perfect frog-splash. Ref bump for no discernable reason. Not sure why we needed that but OK. Ref wakes up, counts a nearfall, and gets squished in the corner again as a bunch of dudes in black hoodies in jeans look to interfere. Sloppy roll-up mercifully ends this.
Good thing this show was free because I would not have plunked down $15 to see it otherwise.
Saturday, December 21, 2013
Funaki & Petey Williams vs. D.O.C. & Knux
Funaki and Petey Williams vs. D.O.C. and Knux - TNA One Night Only: World Cup - 3
Did you know PWI awarded Aces & Eights vs. TNA as Feud of the Year in 2012? Let's not pause on that. I bet D.O.C.'s jeans smell worse than a truck driver after a cross-country trek. Funaki dressed in his SmackDown! #1 Announcer gear with not one but two mock SD! logos on it. Funaki's punches look like he's skipping stones in a pond. I've never been more hot and cold on a tag team before. I'm game for Funaki but Petey is the drizzling shits. Williams' ROH run is the cure for insomnia. D.O.C. has a pretty decent jumping leg drop but he's no Ernie Ladd. Wonder if Knux could get into BoLA next year? I'd love to see him go out in the first round to Candice LeRae or Johnny Yuma. This World Cup has been about as international as an IHOP. Petey did some slingshot move that was indecipherable. Funaki nearfall off of a crossbody. Haven't seen one of those finish someone off since Adam Cole beat Davey Richards at ROH's 10th Ann. show. Lousy finish with a hammer shot so fraudulent I made a citizen's arrest on my cable box.
Did you know PWI awarded Aces & Eights vs. TNA as Feud of the Year in 2012? Let's not pause on that. I bet D.O.C.'s jeans smell worse than a truck driver after a cross-country trek. Funaki dressed in his SmackDown! #1 Announcer gear with not one but two mock SD! logos on it. Funaki's punches look like he's skipping stones in a pond. I've never been more hot and cold on a tag team before. I'm game for Funaki but Petey is the drizzling shits. Williams' ROH run is the cure for insomnia. D.O.C. has a pretty decent jumping leg drop but he's no Ernie Ladd. Wonder if Knux could get into BoLA next year? I'd love to see him go out in the first round to Candice LeRae or Johnny Yuma. This World Cup has been about as international as an IHOP. Petey did some slingshot move that was indecipherable. Funaki nearfall off of a crossbody. Haven't seen one of those finish someone off since Adam Cole beat Davey Richards at ROH's 10th Ann. show. Lousy finish with a hammer shot so fraudulent I made a citizen's arrest on my cable box.
Monday, December 16, 2013
WWE TLC 2013 Kickoff
Our co-hosts (or cohorts?) were Mick Foley in Santa hat, Booker (is he permanently banned from Wendy's in the greater Houston area?), and Miz looking like a candy cane with pinstriped shirt. I hear he and Maryse set a date for their wedding. Too bad the "Kliq" is dead -- would have been great for Hall and the boys to send them a wedding gift of a box full of fecal casserole. Good luck finding a wedding dress that'll cover those silver dollar nipples. Ahem, let's get back on topic and watch some 720p res pro wres in the 'ol web browser Netscape '97.
Kofi comes out and interrupts the broadcast slapping Miz across his face and making his dandy boy haircut undulate. I'm guessing this leads to a match on the PPV proper for them. I'm sure the guy in Sec 207 Row J Seat 12 is thrilled.
1. Dolph Ziggler vs. Fandango - 2
I wonder if JBL still has any of that shitty MamaJuana Energy left? I could use one to power through this night. Fandango's wrists are limper than Lawler faced with the prospect of sleeping with a woman his own age. 15 sec. into the bout we go to a commercial? On a free webcast which is basically a big infomercial for the PPV anyway? Back with a Fanny chinlock, Back suplex to escape by Dolph leaves Fanda bouncing across the mat like a little league grounder. Dolph flying clothesline looked like Evan Bourne aping. Fando doing a "Falcon Arrow" made Hayabusa roll his wheelchair down a fire escape (which strangely was located a few ft. away from his computer). Top rope legdrop for the win by Dango Unchained not Alabama Jam maybe Alabama Apple Butter.
Kofi comes out and interrupts the broadcast slapping Miz across his face and making his dandy boy haircut undulate. I'm guessing this leads to a match on the PPV proper for them. I'm sure the guy in Sec 207 Row J Seat 12 is thrilled.
1. Dolph Ziggler vs. Fandango - 2
I wonder if JBL still has any of that shitty MamaJuana Energy left? I could use one to power through this night. Fandango's wrists are limper than Lawler faced with the prospect of sleeping with a woman his own age. 15 sec. into the bout we go to a commercial? On a free webcast which is basically a big infomercial for the PPV anyway? Back with a Fanny chinlock, Back suplex to escape by Dolph leaves Fanda bouncing across the mat like a little league grounder. Dolph flying clothesline looked like Evan Bourne aping. Fando doing a "Falcon Arrow" made Hayabusa roll his wheelchair down a fire escape (which strangely was located a few ft. away from his computer). Top rope legdrop for the win by Dango Unchained not Alabama Jam maybe Alabama Apple Butter.
Sunday, December 15, 2013
WWF @ Nassau Coliseum - 7/10/1989
WWF @ Nassau Coliseum 7-10-1989
Announcers: Tony Schiavone and Sean Mooney
1. Iron Mike Sharpe vs. Tim Horner - 4
For an 80s WWF house show, this sure seems like an odd match to start off with. I never knew Horner even had a stint in the WWF, guess you learn something new everyday. Sharpe is quickly becoming one of my favorite dudes to watch on old school footage. He’s constantly vocalizing during the match whether its delivering offense, which is really stiff looking, or if he’s backing off and stalling. Sharpe does the old Andre spot where he gets tied up in the ropes. Horner charged just as Sharpe got untangled and took a wild bump to the floor. Horner took a ton of abuse during the match by way of bearhugs, clubbing blows to the back, elbow drops, etc but somehow managed to gain a roll-up for the win in what seems like a bit of an upset. Then again, maybe not, as I’ve never seen Sharpe win a match.
2. The Warlord vs. Koko B. Ware - 3
Koko comes in to this match sporting a ridiculous hair style. It’s light blonde, almost white, on top with blue and gold around the back. Yeah, it’s about as hideous and garish as it sounds. Warlord dominated early with a bearhug and held it forever. Once the bearhug misery from Warlord was over, Koko shined and hit a wild top rope dropkick and took a hellacious backdrop over the top rope to the floor. The fun ended soon after though as Warlord delivered an absolutely vicious clothesline to send Koko back to the hair stylist, presumably to get a new haircut.
3. Mr. Perfect vs. Hercules - 3
I’m seeing a trend thus far in this show, big muscled up dude vs. small dude who can move around the ring. Said trend continues here. Hercules has gotten in maybe three offensive moves all while Perfect has been doing stalling outside the ring. Whole match has been the Mr. Perfect show with Perfect pretty much creating the whole match himself by doing the stalling which annoyed the crowd, bumping around like crazy, doing some tremendous selling of a basics such as a bearhug and a headlock. Liked the spot where Perfect’s head was rammed into the turnbuckles all the way down and ended with his head getting bounced off the mat. Herc starts getting a comeback and the bell rings randomly. So wait, this ends in a draw? Match was sluggish and slow from the beginning so I should have figured that was coming.
4. Jose Luis Rivera vs. The Genius - 2
Early on Genius is doing pretty much a carbon copy of Perfect’s stalling in the previous match, showing he has all the imagination of a Xerox machine. So much punching in this match it’s not even funny. I’m beginning to think that it’s the only offense these guys know. Not much substance to this, just two guys going through the motions and a crowd that could have cared less. Highest impact move of the match was the senton from Genius to get the pin.
5. Hillbilly Jim & Hacksaw Jim Duggan vs. Andre the Giant & Haku - 4
First five minutes of this was Duggan and Hillbilly farting around the ring while Andre and Haku hid in the dressing room because they seemed to be offended by the crowd chanting “U-S-A”. When they finally did make it to the ring, Andre began complaining about the 2x4 and the horseshoe in the corner of Duggan and Hillbilly. At this point, nobody has touched each other for about eight minutes and the bell FINALLY rings. Not off to a good start. Holy shit! Duggan and Haku finally locked up and started wrestling after about ten minutes of shenanigans. Andre was really limited in doing spots and moved with all the speed and grace of a brontosaurus corpse. Haku was always the workhorse when he had the run teaming with Andre and that was the case here, working 95% of the match for his team. Nice to know that his efforts would be rewarded with a brief tag title stiny early in 1990. Duggan and Hillbilly cheated like motherfuckers during the match, doing double team moves right in front of the referee and using the 2x4 that the referee hid beforehand to get the win. Match didn’t start off great and the referee lost complete control at times. I was hoping for a fun tag match from the way it looked on paper but the final product was a terrible letdown but earns a bonus point from me for uniqueness.
6. Sandy Beach vs. Paul Roma - 2
Never heard of this Sandy Beach guy. I wonder though if he could be the guy from the UWF name Sonny Beach? It feels like these two are moving in slow motion. Good gosh, Roma did an absolutely awful armdrag off an Irish whip. Roma is holding the ankle lock forever, much like the Warlord did earlier with the bearhug. Tony on commentary does some bad puns saying that Beach will be “all washed up” if Roma continues his offensive flury of unoffensive moves. Beach locked in a bearhug and then into the lightest version of a Steiner Recliner ever. Roma gets a big comeback and absolutely nobody cared. A basic powerslam mercifully ended this droll of a match.
7. Randy Savage vs. Brutus Beefcake - 4
I don’t ever remember these two squaring off against each other so this will be interesting. Beefcake hit a flying body press and then shoved a knee right into Macho’s face. Macho takes some awesome big bumps early, including a huge one over the top rope. Beefcake got in a couple good nearfalls, including one off a really light looking roll-up. Not a big fan of how every time Beefcake either gets near the apron or winds up on the floor, Sherri blatantly gets involved using and assortment of chokes, back rakes, and general scariness. Beefcake gets some momentum back, locks on the sleeper, and the crowd goes absolutely apeshit! Once again though, Sherri has to interefere and gets Savage DQ’ed. Match was good and but not a big fan of the finish.
8. WWF Tag Team Title: Demolition vs. The Twin Towers (Big Boss Man & Akeem) - 4
Seems like everyone’s offense thus far has consisted of punches and nothing else. Boss Man’s spine buster on Smash was pretty stiff looking as was the punt to the ribs that followed. Really wasn’t enthralled when the Towers were controlling the match, felt really slow and lethargic. Finish was a little chaotic with all four guys brawling and Boss Man accidentally hitting Akeem with a nightstick allowing Ax to get the pin. I was sort of hoping for everyone just to be wailing on each other since these were four big dudes. Oh well, at least it was a somewhat acceptable match and a decent way to end this show.
Announcers: Tony Schiavone and Sean Mooney
1. Iron Mike Sharpe vs. Tim Horner - 4
For an 80s WWF house show, this sure seems like an odd match to start off with. I never knew Horner even had a stint in the WWF, guess you learn something new everyday. Sharpe is quickly becoming one of my favorite dudes to watch on old school footage. He’s constantly vocalizing during the match whether its delivering offense, which is really stiff looking, or if he’s backing off and stalling. Sharpe does the old Andre spot where he gets tied up in the ropes. Horner charged just as Sharpe got untangled and took a wild bump to the floor. Horner took a ton of abuse during the match by way of bearhugs, clubbing blows to the back, elbow drops, etc but somehow managed to gain a roll-up for the win in what seems like a bit of an upset. Then again, maybe not, as I’ve never seen Sharpe win a match.
2. The Warlord vs. Koko B. Ware - 3
Koko comes in to this match sporting a ridiculous hair style. It’s light blonde, almost white, on top with blue and gold around the back. Yeah, it’s about as hideous and garish as it sounds. Warlord dominated early with a bearhug and held it forever. Once the bearhug misery from Warlord was over, Koko shined and hit a wild top rope dropkick and took a hellacious backdrop over the top rope to the floor. The fun ended soon after though as Warlord delivered an absolutely vicious clothesline to send Koko back to the hair stylist, presumably to get a new haircut.
3. Mr. Perfect vs. Hercules - 3
I’m seeing a trend thus far in this show, big muscled up dude vs. small dude who can move around the ring. Said trend continues here. Hercules has gotten in maybe three offensive moves all while Perfect has been doing stalling outside the ring. Whole match has been the Mr. Perfect show with Perfect pretty much creating the whole match himself by doing the stalling which annoyed the crowd, bumping around like crazy, doing some tremendous selling of a basics such as a bearhug and a headlock. Liked the spot where Perfect’s head was rammed into the turnbuckles all the way down and ended with his head getting bounced off the mat. Herc starts getting a comeback and the bell rings randomly. So wait, this ends in a draw? Match was sluggish and slow from the beginning so I should have figured that was coming.
4. Jose Luis Rivera vs. The Genius - 2
Early on Genius is doing pretty much a carbon copy of Perfect’s stalling in the previous match, showing he has all the imagination of a Xerox machine. So much punching in this match it’s not even funny. I’m beginning to think that it’s the only offense these guys know. Not much substance to this, just two guys going through the motions and a crowd that could have cared less. Highest impact move of the match was the senton from Genius to get the pin.
5. Hillbilly Jim & Hacksaw Jim Duggan vs. Andre the Giant & Haku - 4
First five minutes of this was Duggan and Hillbilly farting around the ring while Andre and Haku hid in the dressing room because they seemed to be offended by the crowd chanting “U-S-A”. When they finally did make it to the ring, Andre began complaining about the 2x4 and the horseshoe in the corner of Duggan and Hillbilly. At this point, nobody has touched each other for about eight minutes and the bell FINALLY rings. Not off to a good start. Holy shit! Duggan and Haku finally locked up and started wrestling after about ten minutes of shenanigans. Andre was really limited in doing spots and moved with all the speed and grace of a brontosaurus corpse. Haku was always the workhorse when he had the run teaming with Andre and that was the case here, working 95% of the match for his team. Nice to know that his efforts would be rewarded with a brief tag title stiny early in 1990. Duggan and Hillbilly cheated like motherfuckers during the match, doing double team moves right in front of the referee and using the 2x4 that the referee hid beforehand to get the win. Match didn’t start off great and the referee lost complete control at times. I was hoping for a fun tag match from the way it looked on paper but the final product was a terrible letdown but earns a bonus point from me for uniqueness.
6. Sandy Beach vs. Paul Roma - 2
Never heard of this Sandy Beach guy. I wonder though if he could be the guy from the UWF name Sonny Beach? It feels like these two are moving in slow motion. Good gosh, Roma did an absolutely awful armdrag off an Irish whip. Roma is holding the ankle lock forever, much like the Warlord did earlier with the bearhug. Tony on commentary does some bad puns saying that Beach will be “all washed up” if Roma continues his offensive flury of unoffensive moves. Beach locked in a bearhug and then into the lightest version of a Steiner Recliner ever. Roma gets a big comeback and absolutely nobody cared. A basic powerslam mercifully ended this droll of a match.
7. Randy Savage vs. Brutus Beefcake - 4
I don’t ever remember these two squaring off against each other so this will be interesting. Beefcake hit a flying body press and then shoved a knee right into Macho’s face. Macho takes some awesome big bumps early, including a huge one over the top rope. Beefcake got in a couple good nearfalls, including one off a really light looking roll-up. Not a big fan of how every time Beefcake either gets near the apron or winds up on the floor, Sherri blatantly gets involved using and assortment of chokes, back rakes, and general scariness. Beefcake gets some momentum back, locks on the sleeper, and the crowd goes absolutely apeshit! Once again though, Sherri has to interefere and gets Savage DQ’ed. Match was good and but not a big fan of the finish.
8. WWF Tag Team Title: Demolition vs. The Twin Towers (Big Boss Man & Akeem) - 4
Seems like everyone’s offense thus far has consisted of punches and nothing else. Boss Man’s spine buster on Smash was pretty stiff looking as was the punt to the ribs that followed. Really wasn’t enthralled when the Towers were controlling the match, felt really slow and lethargic. Finish was a little chaotic with all four guys brawling and Boss Man accidentally hitting Akeem with a nightstick allowing Ax to get the pin. I was sort of hoping for everyone just to be wailing on each other since these were four big dudes. Oh well, at least it was a somewhat acceptable match and a decent way to end this show.
Friday, December 13, 2013
WWF Raw 12/9/13 - The Slammy's
This is the Slammy Awards yearly edition of Raw but we won't be covering those mountebank frauds. Our passion for the pro wres is at an all-time high so just felt like doing a random rev of something on that current tip. This is a loose co-review done late in the week with little to no notes taken so its coherency is not certified.
1. Daniel Bryan vs. Fandango - B: 4 A: 4
Brian: Seattle was raucous for their hometown boy Bryan. Daniel's Tajiri headkick whiffed. I liked Fandango countering the missile dropkick with a sitdown powerbomb -- too bad it looked crummy.
Adam: Surprised they are starting Raw off with a match and not some lengthy gab segment. Some pretty solid action here, liked Fandago catching Bryan from the top into a sit-out powerbomb. I’ve really enjoyed Fandango this year, his act has been a nice bit for fresh air. Fandango crashed and burned on the top rope legdrop. Buisaku knee finished off this one. A really fun match to kick off the show.
2. Santino Marella vs. Damian Sandow - A: 1 B: 1
Adam: Too bad a man of Sandow’s intelligence has to deal with a joker like Santino. Santino’s schtick is so old and tired. Nice to see Sandow pick up the win. Match did absolutely NOTHING for me.
Brian: I liked Santino's face-plant bump off the legsweep. Sandow was going through the motions.
3. Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz - B: 2 A: 3
Brian: Dug the match-opening running dropkick to Miz's face. Kofi's back roundhouse kick he's just started busting out the last few weeks is a vicious treat. A couple meaty running kicks to a downed Miz. Kofi showing more aggression was a nice touch. Roll-up finish came too early and extends this ersatz program further to the thrill of none. Miz has never been more flat as a character.
Adam: Hey look, it’s the Miz! Somewhere, there are crickets chirping. Liked Kofi kicking Miz right in his face numerous times, with the last one especially hard. Miz needs a haircut and a character reboot. Miz grabbed the trunks for a cheap win to the the delight of no one. Liked Kofi’s offense and him at least trying to make the match passable, to which he succeeded. Miz could disappear off my TV and I wouldn’t even notice.
4. Cody Rhodes, Goldust, Big Show, and Rey Mysterio vs. Jack Swagger, Antonio Cesaro, Ryback, and Curtis Axel - A: 4 B: 4
Adam: The resurgence of the tag division throughout the year has really been a pleasant change from the usual. Goldust has been really awesome in his comeback this year and I’ll be damned if he didn’t have a damn good face-in-peril strectch. Cody’s missle dropkick was nice. Big Show knocked people over like bowling pins. Some solid work on the heel side but things really felt like they were being rushed.
Brian: Adam hit the nail on the head (he can also hammer a nail with the head of his penis -- it's a great party trick!). Goldust is looking trim and is working hard. After reading his lousy book wasn't sure he'd ever have another run in him but he's been a real treat on the this year's back-end. Mysterio needs a new tailor.
5. Sin Cara vs. Alberto Del Rio - B: 4 A: 2
Brian: I wasn't as down on this as Adam yet I did have some serious and legit reservations about the whole ordeal. The mood lighting is shit. Let's establish that for starters. It tells your audience: "Hey! This guy is different! Isn't he not like the other WWE superstars? He's different, right?" which is exactly the opposite of what Mistico needs (but is that even him since the return two weeks ago this guy looks puffier and has a regretful tattoo -- could it be Hunico again?). The light gimmick never was over and now just feels like a tired insult or endurance test. You could see the crowd's eyes literally glaze over. Anyhow, Del Rio, coming off a major title run, putting Cara over clean two straight weeks is interesting TV despite their best efforts to ruin it. I'd love to see them get a legit, hate-fueled feud. Also, that shitty Swanton to end was painful to watch. You've got your opponent dead to rights right beneath you and instead of just splattering him you overshoot him and the hairs on the back of your neck leisurely graze his left shoulder and that's supposed to be a buyable finish? Left a worse taste in my mouth than that shoe did in Werner Herzog's.
Adam: Please no mood lighting, please no mood lighting … damn it, there’s mood lighting! Crowd is instantly bored and starts chanting for the Seahawks. Sin Cara got thrown into the railing really hard. This feels like a mass execution because they’ve just killed this crowd. JBL called this match of the night, not sure what he’s watching. Nasty looking flip powerbomb from the top just destroyed Del Rio. That was the about the highlight of this mess. Two lucha guys working a slow WWE-style match isn’t exactly something I’m interested in.
6. Brodus Clay vs. Xavier Woods - A: 0 B: 1
Adam: I love Woods looking like a sleazy Rick James. Shit, it’s over just like that? Damn. What was it Chris Tucker said in Friday? “You just got knocked the fuck out!!”
Brian: A point for stiffness. Liked Xavier peppering Brodus' head with shots before getting pulverized. Too bad JAPW is gone (or is it? Who can keep track?) as that's where Clay belongs. Or All Japan. Just not on Monday nights.
7. C.M Punk vs. Dean Ambrose - B: 5 A: 5
Brian: Not sure if I'd rank this above their match the previous week on SmackDown! 12/6/13 but it's awfully damn close. Definitely match of the show by a mile. Myself and many others criticize Punk for a guy that's supposed to have all this kick-based offense has really shitty-looking kicks but his high-kick late here looked like a legit Stipe Miočić KO. Moxley was great as the slimy charmer during the Shield presentation of some obtuse Slammy Award.
Adam: Yes, please! I would glady pay money to go see this match. Punk working over the arm was really nice. I’ve been a huge Ambrose/Jon Moxley fan for a while now since he started headlining HWA shows way back in 2006. Local boy done good! Punk’s selling of his ribs was really good. Ambrose got all mouthy in the ring and then went right back to hitting Punk in the ribs. Punk’s cross-body looked like shit but lead to a bunch of really good nearfalls. If that Sin Cara match was a mass execution, then this could be called a ressurection as the crowd finally woke up and got really into the nearfalls. GTS finished this off. Probably the best match of the show thus far.
8. The Usos vs. Luke Harper & Erick Rowan - A: 4 B: 3
Adam: Uso’s start off fast and hit a really nice double team dive. The Wyatts have been one of my favorite new acts of the year. Love the creepy backwoods demeanor they bring to the table. Yeah, I know, a lot of people are down on their in-ring work but I don’t mind it that much. Bray Wyatt is a hell of a mouthpiece and Rowan and Harper have improved quite a bit to me since their debut. Finish was chaotic, but in a good way. Good nearfall off a top-rope splash from Uso #1 (don’t ask which is which because I can’t remember), Uso #2 gets a vicious face full of table, and Harper comes back and just absolutely murders and Uso #1 with a clothesline to get the pin. Fun little tag match.
Brian: Usos in my opinion may be most improved in not just WWE but anywhere in 2013. They went from a fairly generic Samoan team to two guys doing balls-out offensive bursts rivaling the best stuff on the planet. Mixing athleticism with innovation and thrills they're making must see TV. I'd love to see them against Evolution (Joe Doering and Suwama). I dig Harper (longtime Brodie Lee fan) and Rowan (to a lesser extent) just wish they'd give them longer matches to tell some in-ring stories. Rowan has Daniel Bryan tonight (12/13) on SD! and on the Troops show later this month so I'll be looking forward to those.
9. Tamina vs. Natalya - B: 0 A: 2
Brian: Man, this lasted roughly 90 seconds so no offense to the ladies, but this gets a big goose egg for being as incomplete as Jessie's ballot for upcoming WCW WorldWide '97 project. Nice crowd pop for the Sharpshooter though.
Adam: Not a whole lot to see here. Felt to me like a normal, everyday divas match and pretty flat. A.J. on the outside took the best bump of the match getting accidentally kicked in the face and falling off the apron.
1. Daniel Bryan vs. Fandango - B: 4 A: 4
Brian: Seattle was raucous for their hometown boy Bryan. Daniel's Tajiri headkick whiffed. I liked Fandango countering the missile dropkick with a sitdown powerbomb -- too bad it looked crummy.
Adam: Surprised they are starting Raw off with a match and not some lengthy gab segment. Some pretty solid action here, liked Fandago catching Bryan from the top into a sit-out powerbomb. I’ve really enjoyed Fandango this year, his act has been a nice bit for fresh air. Fandango crashed and burned on the top rope legdrop. Buisaku knee finished off this one. A really fun match to kick off the show.
2. Santino Marella vs. Damian Sandow - A: 1 B: 1
Adam: Too bad a man of Sandow’s intelligence has to deal with a joker like Santino. Santino’s schtick is so old and tired. Nice to see Sandow pick up the win. Match did absolutely NOTHING for me.
Brian: I liked Santino's face-plant bump off the legsweep. Sandow was going through the motions.
3. Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz - B: 2 A: 3
Brian: Dug the match-opening running dropkick to Miz's face. Kofi's back roundhouse kick he's just started busting out the last few weeks is a vicious treat. A couple meaty running kicks to a downed Miz. Kofi showing more aggression was a nice touch. Roll-up finish came too early and extends this ersatz program further to the thrill of none. Miz has never been more flat as a character.
Adam: Hey look, it’s the Miz! Somewhere, there are crickets chirping. Liked Kofi kicking Miz right in his face numerous times, with the last one especially hard. Miz needs a haircut and a character reboot. Miz grabbed the trunks for a cheap win to the the delight of no one. Liked Kofi’s offense and him at least trying to make the match passable, to which he succeeded. Miz could disappear off my TV and I wouldn’t even notice.
4. Cody Rhodes, Goldust, Big Show, and Rey Mysterio vs. Jack Swagger, Antonio Cesaro, Ryback, and Curtis Axel - A: 4 B: 4
Adam: The resurgence of the tag division throughout the year has really been a pleasant change from the usual. Goldust has been really awesome in his comeback this year and I’ll be damned if he didn’t have a damn good face-in-peril strectch. Cody’s missle dropkick was nice. Big Show knocked people over like bowling pins. Some solid work on the heel side but things really felt like they were being rushed.
Brian: Adam hit the nail on the head (he can also hammer a nail with the head of his penis -- it's a great party trick!). Goldust is looking trim and is working hard. After reading his lousy book wasn't sure he'd ever have another run in him but he's been a real treat on the this year's back-end. Mysterio needs a new tailor.
5. Sin Cara vs. Alberto Del Rio - B: 4 A: 2
Brian: I wasn't as down on this as Adam yet I did have some serious and legit reservations about the whole ordeal. The mood lighting is shit. Let's establish that for starters. It tells your audience: "Hey! This guy is different! Isn't he not like the other WWE superstars? He's different, right?" which is exactly the opposite of what Mistico needs (but is that even him since the return two weeks ago this guy looks puffier and has a regretful tattoo -- could it be Hunico again?). The light gimmick never was over and now just feels like a tired insult or endurance test. You could see the crowd's eyes literally glaze over. Anyhow, Del Rio, coming off a major title run, putting Cara over clean two straight weeks is interesting TV despite their best efforts to ruin it. I'd love to see them get a legit, hate-fueled feud. Also, that shitty Swanton to end was painful to watch. You've got your opponent dead to rights right beneath you and instead of just splattering him you overshoot him and the hairs on the back of your neck leisurely graze his left shoulder and that's supposed to be a buyable finish? Left a worse taste in my mouth than that shoe did in Werner Herzog's.
Adam: Please no mood lighting, please no mood lighting … damn it, there’s mood lighting! Crowd is instantly bored and starts chanting for the Seahawks. Sin Cara got thrown into the railing really hard. This feels like a mass execution because they’ve just killed this crowd. JBL called this match of the night, not sure what he’s watching. Nasty looking flip powerbomb from the top just destroyed Del Rio. That was the about the highlight of this mess. Two lucha guys working a slow WWE-style match isn’t exactly something I’m interested in.
6. Brodus Clay vs. Xavier Woods - A: 0 B: 1
Adam: I love Woods looking like a sleazy Rick James. Shit, it’s over just like that? Damn. What was it Chris Tucker said in Friday? “You just got knocked the fuck out!!”
Brian: A point for stiffness. Liked Xavier peppering Brodus' head with shots before getting pulverized. Too bad JAPW is gone (or is it? Who can keep track?) as that's where Clay belongs. Or All Japan. Just not on Monday nights.
7. C.M Punk vs. Dean Ambrose - B: 5 A: 5
Brian: Not sure if I'd rank this above their match the previous week on SmackDown! 12/6/13 but it's awfully damn close. Definitely match of the show by a mile. Myself and many others criticize Punk for a guy that's supposed to have all this kick-based offense has really shitty-looking kicks but his high-kick late here looked like a legit Stipe Miočić KO. Moxley was great as the slimy charmer during the Shield presentation of some obtuse Slammy Award.
Adam: Yes, please! I would glady pay money to go see this match. Punk working over the arm was really nice. I’ve been a huge Ambrose/Jon Moxley fan for a while now since he started headlining HWA shows way back in 2006. Local boy done good! Punk’s selling of his ribs was really good. Ambrose got all mouthy in the ring and then went right back to hitting Punk in the ribs. Punk’s cross-body looked like shit but lead to a bunch of really good nearfalls. If that Sin Cara match was a mass execution, then this could be called a ressurection as the crowd finally woke up and got really into the nearfalls. GTS finished this off. Probably the best match of the show thus far.
8. The Usos vs. Luke Harper & Erick Rowan - A: 4 B: 3
Adam: Uso’s start off fast and hit a really nice double team dive. The Wyatts have been one of my favorite new acts of the year. Love the creepy backwoods demeanor they bring to the table. Yeah, I know, a lot of people are down on their in-ring work but I don’t mind it that much. Bray Wyatt is a hell of a mouthpiece and Rowan and Harper have improved quite a bit to me since their debut. Finish was chaotic, but in a good way. Good nearfall off a top-rope splash from Uso #1 (don’t ask which is which because I can’t remember), Uso #2 gets a vicious face full of table, and Harper comes back and just absolutely murders and Uso #1 with a clothesline to get the pin. Fun little tag match.
Brian: Usos in my opinion may be most improved in not just WWE but anywhere in 2013. They went from a fairly generic Samoan team to two guys doing balls-out offensive bursts rivaling the best stuff on the planet. Mixing athleticism with innovation and thrills they're making must see TV. I'd love to see them against Evolution (Joe Doering and Suwama). I dig Harper (longtime Brodie Lee fan) and Rowan (to a lesser extent) just wish they'd give them longer matches to tell some in-ring stories. Rowan has Daniel Bryan tonight (12/13) on SD! and on the Troops show later this month so I'll be looking forward to those.
9. Tamina vs. Natalya - B: 0 A: 2
Brian: Man, this lasted roughly 90 seconds so no offense to the ladies, but this gets a big goose egg for being as incomplete as Jessie's ballot for upcoming WCW WorldWide '97 project. Nice crowd pop for the Sharpshooter though.
Adam: Not a whole lot to see here. Felt to me like a normal, everyday divas match and pretty flat. A.J. on the outside took the best bump of the match getting accidentally kicked in the face and falling off the apron.
Monday, December 9, 2013
Marella & Carlito vs. Holly & Rhodes
Santino Marella and Carlito vs. Hardcore Holly and Cody Rhodes - WWE Raw 6/2/08 - 1
"Rowdy" Piper, shirtless, yet wearing an open leather jacket, besides the fashion faux pas is also out to be guest timekeeper (or "timekeener" Rhodes says like a marble-mouthed buffoon). Santino's judo throw looked better than as now its a comedy spot he does at quarter-speed. Carlito does some decent staggering sells off of some quasi-stiff Rhodes forearms. Marella's still got cheap gear here -- looks like his name is in Times New Roman on the back. Carlito's "big boot" to reverse Holly's spinebuster on Marella looked like shit. Looked like someone at 5AM trying to knock ice off the car and nearly slipping.
"Rowdy" Piper, shirtless, yet wearing an open leather jacket, besides the fashion faux pas is also out to be guest timekeeper (or "timekeener" Rhodes says like a marble-mouthed buffoon). Santino's judo throw looked better than as now its a comedy spot he does at quarter-speed. Carlito does some decent staggering sells off of some quasi-stiff Rhodes forearms. Marella's still got cheap gear here -- looks like his name is in Times New Roman on the back. Carlito's "big boot" to reverse Holly's spinebuster on Marella looked like shit. Looked like someone at 5AM trying to knock ice off the car and nearly slipping.
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