Sunday, December 15, 2013

WWF @ Nassau Coliseum - 7/10/1989

WWF @ Nassau Coliseum 7-10-1989
Announcers: Tony Schiavone and Sean Mooney

1. Iron Mike Sharpe vs. Tim Horner - 4

For an 80s WWF house show, this sure seems like an odd match to start off with. I never knew Horner even had a stint in the WWF, guess you learn something new everyday. Sharpe is quickly becoming one of my favorite dudes to watch on old school footage. He’s constantly vocalizing during the match whether its delivering offense, which is really stiff looking, or if he’s backing off and stalling. Sharpe does the old Andre spot where he gets tied up in the ropes. Horner charged just as Sharpe got untangled and took a wild bump to the floor. Horner took a ton of abuse during the match by way of bearhugs, clubbing blows to the back, elbow drops, etc but somehow managed to gain a roll-up for the win in what seems like a bit of an upset. Then again, maybe not, as I’ve never seen Sharpe win a match.

2. The Warlord vs. Koko B. Ware - 3

Koko comes in to this match sporting a ridiculous hair style. It’s light blonde, almost white, on top with blue and gold around the back. Yeah, it’s about as hideous and garish as it sounds. Warlord dominated early with a bearhug and held it forever. Once the bearhug misery from Warlord was over, Koko shined and hit a wild top rope dropkick and took a hellacious backdrop over the top rope to the floor. The fun ended soon after though as Warlord delivered an absolutely vicious clothesline to send Koko back to the hair stylist, presumably to get a new haircut.

3. Mr. Perfect vs. Hercules - 3

I’m seeing a trend thus far in this show, big muscled up dude vs. small dude who can move around the ring. Said trend continues here. Hercules has gotten in maybe three offensive moves all while Perfect has been doing stalling outside the ring. Whole match has been the Mr. Perfect show with Perfect pretty much creating the whole match himself by doing the stalling which annoyed the crowd, bumping around like crazy, doing some tremendous selling of a basics such as a bearhug and a headlock. Liked the spot where Perfect’s head was rammed into the turnbuckles all the way down and ended with his head getting bounced off the mat. Herc starts getting a comeback and the bell rings randomly. So wait, this ends in a draw? Match was sluggish and slow from the beginning so I should have figured that was coming.

4. Jose Luis Rivera vs. The Genius - 2

Early on Genius is doing pretty much a carbon copy of Perfect’s stalling in the previous match, showing he has all the imagination of a Xerox machine. So much punching in this match it’s not even funny. I’m beginning to think that it’s the only offense these guys know. Not much substance to this, just two guys going through the motions and a crowd that could have cared less. Highest impact move of the match was the senton from Genius to get the pin.

5. Hillbilly Jim & Hacksaw Jim Duggan vs. Andre the Giant & Haku - 4

First five minutes of this was Duggan and Hillbilly farting around the ring while Andre and Haku hid in the dressing room because they seemed to be offended by the crowd chanting “U-S-A”. When they finally did make it to the ring, Andre began complaining about the 2x4 and the horseshoe in the corner of Duggan and Hillbilly. At this point, nobody has touched each other for about eight minutes and the bell FINALLY rings. Not off to a good start. Holy shit! Duggan and Haku finally locked up and started wrestling after about ten minutes of shenanigans. Andre was really limited in doing spots and moved with all the speed and grace of a brontosaurus corpse. Haku was always the workhorse when he had the run teaming with Andre and that was the case here, working 95% of the match for his team. Nice to know that his efforts would be rewarded with a brief tag title stiny early in 1990. Duggan and Hillbilly cheated like motherfuckers during the match, doing double team moves right in front of the referee and using the 2x4 that the referee hid beforehand to get the win. Match didn’t start off great and the referee lost complete control at times. I was hoping for a fun tag match from the way it looked on paper but the final product was a terrible letdown but earns a bonus point from me for uniqueness.

6. Sandy Beach vs. Paul Roma - 2

Never heard of this Sandy Beach guy. I wonder though if he could be the guy from the UWF name Sonny Beach? It feels like these two are moving in slow motion. Good gosh, Roma did an absolutely awful armdrag off an Irish whip. Roma is holding the ankle lock forever, much like the Warlord did earlier with the bearhug. Tony on commentary does some bad puns saying that Beach will be “all washed up” if Roma continues his offensive flury of unoffensive moves. Beach locked in a bearhug and then into the lightest version of a Steiner Recliner ever. Roma gets a big comeback and absolutely nobody cared. A basic powerslam mercifully ended this droll of a match.

7. Randy Savage vs. Brutus Beefcake - 4

I don’t ever remember these two squaring off against each other so this will be interesting. Beefcake hit a flying body press and then shoved a knee right into Macho’s face. Macho takes some awesome big bumps early, including a huge one over the top rope. Beefcake got in a couple good nearfalls, including one off a really light looking roll-up. Not a big fan of how every time Beefcake either gets near the apron or winds up on the floor, Sherri blatantly gets involved using and assortment of chokes, back rakes, and general scariness. Beefcake gets some momentum back, locks on the sleeper, and the crowd goes absolutely apeshit! Once again though, Sherri has to interefere and gets Savage DQ’ed. Match was good and but not a big fan of the finish.

8. WWF Tag Team Title: Demolition vs. The Twin Towers (Big Boss Man & Akeem) - 4

Seems like everyone’s offense thus far has consisted of punches and nothing else. Boss Man’s spine buster on Smash was pretty stiff looking as was the punt to the ribs that followed. Really wasn’t enthralled when the Towers were controlling the match, felt really slow and lethargic. Finish was a little chaotic with all four guys brawling and Boss Man accidentally hitting Akeem with a nightstick allowing Ax to get the pin. I was sort of hoping for everyone just to be wailing on each other since these were four big dudes. Oh well, at least it was a somewhat acceptable match and a decent way to end this show.

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