1) Kimala v. The Great Yatsu- 1
2) The Mongol v. Mike Reed- 2
3) The Fabulous Freebirds v. Kerry Von Erich/ Iceman Parsons/ Chavo Guerrero (Penalty Box Match)- 5
This was atrocious, uglier than Renee Zellwegger's prom dress in Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. This was uglier than Janet Jackson's right tit. Both guys had managers interefering, Kimala no sold everything and his splash is a damn joke. Looks like a guy trying to lay down comfortably on a bed of nails. Great gimmick, horrible worker. Mongol's squash was a little better. Mike Reed looked like he dealt cards at the local bar & casino during the weekdays, spending most of his meager pay on overpriced booze & carpet munching strippers. At least on the weekends, he gets to release some aggression- he got in some offense- a few lopsided punches, Mongol just jerked back a few times to signify he was "selling" them but he was doing some big power moves just fine. He tried a few diff. moves for his finisher until he found one he liked.
Main was kind of crazy, Hayes slowly stripped down from his ring gear like he was Liv Tyler in an Aerosmith video (how creepy is it that Steven Tyler had his own daughter getting naked in his video?) Just a crazy brawl for the whole thing, kept in kind of an orderly fashion. All the Freebirds were really going balls out with these exaggerated bumps that looked like cowboy stunt doubles from an old Western movie, it even looked kind of hokey when Chavo was bumping Gordy around like a tennis ball. The only strange thing about this kind of match is how strict the rules have to be to keep the gimmick relevant; once you break the rules, your in the penalty box for 2 minutes, so guys were getting thrown in for throwing closed fists, not holding the tag rope on tags and other stuff that has long since went by the wayside, sadly. Another cool thing is you had Kerry v. Hayes, the clear top players in this feud, but they didn't dominate the spotlight; Chavo Guerrero eventually got the pinfall after over 20 minutes of sweat-filled brawling. And the crowd was on fire, just blowing up at every face punch and kick. Pretty cool to do such a big match to show on regular TV, really gives you your money's worth.
- Skandor Akbar cuts promo about his stable Devastation Inc. at on back porch of house
- Referee David Manning talks about the dangers of the Penalty Box; Bill Mercer won't let him out of the box