Tuesday, March 10, 2009

FCW TV 2/15/09

- colt's on commentary and is gold
- says he had a "bro-date" on valentine's.. watching a taped football game with some dudes proving how "bro" they were

1. Sweet Papi Sanchez vs. Tyson Tarver - 2

- sweet papi comes out with a brown, paper sack
- sanchez is passing out candy to all the ringside rubes
- tyson looks like a shoot fighter
- his manager looks strangely like an angry president obama
- tyson slaps away the handshake
- papi tries again, another slap, followed by a push
- tyson dodges some slow, shoddy shots and clotheslines to dish out some gut punches
- huge hiptoss by sanchez
- club to the back that tarvel sells huge
- jesus, tarver just sold a kneelift by jumping backwards eight-foot
- both guys all in black, in a studio with black painted walls.. not a good luck
- sanchez spin kick none of the pizazz of savio's
- bryon saxton is the name of tarver's second
- saxton gets knocked off the apron inadverntantly
- sweet papi gets the pin with a splash.. somebody call ricky ortiz for finisher theft
overall: sanchez looks like a tubby savio vega clone.. - tarver has more potential, but is still awfully rough, awkward movements, potentially dangerous bumps, etc. - could go somewhere.. but then again.. we all said the same about elijah..

- some bizarre video airs silhouetted by a pink heart.. playing painfully bad music.. - apparently colt had a crush on "the girl from mexico" which was clearly a dude in a purple jumpsuit and bad lucha mask.. - of course, the mask got ripped off, proving that goldman kissed a man.. - not sure what that was all about but josh matthews is having a good time ribbing colt..

2. Alicia Fox vs. Tiffany - 2

- two of ECW's brightest starlets..
- fox working the arm early
- tiff counters and takes her down where they roll about looking for leverage
- tiff ducks under a spinkick and gets a schoolgirl roll-up
- sunset-flip doesn't look bad but fox gets out at .01 so forget that
- fox working a dragon sleeper-like submission but loose and looking confused
- fox dropkick not bad
- tiffany forearms don't cut the mustard when i just watched sara del rey work last night
- tiff crossbody from second rope but nobody home
- fox gives her the big axe kick for the victory, advancing her to the finals of the queen of the fcw tournament the following week
overall: diva's lite.. - none of the built-in fan interest from the big shows.. - just a display of moves sans much emotion or technique.. - alica has a hell of a look, though.. with seasoning she could be a real star..

3. Sheamus O'Shaunessy vs. Johnny Curtis - 2

- jr blew sheamus on his blog a couple weeks back.. just eww..
- scotty says sheamus has a tapeworm.. - looks like some sort of magic marker tattoos of parallel lines in random places on his pale body..
- curtis one-half of fcw tag champs, wearing ace darling's old ring vest
- never know what you'll find in jersey thrift stores
- now sheamus' tatts called celtic war paint.. - still lame..
- curtis mounts in corner but gets dropped face-first
- cabana calls him "real-life zelda"
- matthews asks if zeld took place in ireland?
- no, in hyrule you dumb, frosted hair fuck!
- back to the action.. - heidenreich-esqe headlock control section by sheamus
- decent forearms to face by johnny
- sunset flip, two-count by curtis
- big knees by SOS.. - boring chant..
- colt says the "big time" of being on WWE tastes delicious.. - hope he has a good memory as he won't taste it ever again..
- nice clothesline in the corner by curtis
- not sure what or who curtis is supposed to be.. just looks like a jock with anger issues in standard issues tights
- top-rope clothesline looks like it hurts curtis more than SOS
- some douchebag interferes, dubbed ryeback, then a guy looking like christopher york hops in.. - ugh..
overall: not a stellar outing by SOS.. albeit the hype.. - curtis threw some snug forearms.. but needs a look/persona..

4. Dylan Klein and Jon Cutler vs. Kris Logan and Johnny Prime - 1

- cutler and klien come out cocky with a blond..
- ugh.. prime and logan come out in blue trunks and match brown hair-dos.. - everybody in FCW has the same build, fake tan, muscles, and generic looks..
- cutler has a blue mohawk, klein has two shades of hair.. - at least they are some distinguishable from the pack..
- klein directly ripping spots from orton ppv matches.. not good
- cutler with a reverse ddt/russin leg sweep combo
- northern lights by logan on klein with zero aftersell
- damn, man.. if this is the farm league for the WWE our children are going to be watching some real shitty wrestling..
- i don't want the fcw machine to spit out a bunch of guys with the same exact athletic look
- give me a fat slob like jerry blackwell or an ugly ass backwoods bunkhouse buck.. - something, anything different..
- finish was a vertical suplex/springboard crossbody by logan/prime
- did colt just make an elix skipper reference?
overall: this rubbed me the wrong way.. - fcw is especially exposed when they do tags or multiple-men matches and you see several guys that look like clones of jim powers

5. TJ Wilson vs. Kaval - 7

- sorry, kaval, or low ki.. is one of my all-time favorites.. - not going to take notes on this one.. just kick back, drift into a frighteningly calm trance-like state, and study the fuck out of this motherfucker (i forgot how fun cussing is! being twelve again rocks)
overall: fuck yes.. - i'll give this a bonus point for just coming out of nowhere and soaking the collective sweatpants of the 'net fans.. - the somersault off the elevated announcing station by tj was so '99 super indy and lovely.. - low ki's tidalwave kick from the top and later, rolling koppo kick, never looked better.. - wilson used the "hart lock" a modified sharpshooter allegedly but looked like a head and arm triangle choke to me.. - i liked that while kaval tried to break it tj just kicking him in the face like a real bastard a few times.. - i was floored by ki's bump and sell of getting knocked off the top turnbuckle and falling throat first on the top rope.. - he just completely went for it and fell with all of his weight face-first on the rope, whip lashing his entire body and dropping him.. - the warrior's way from the top for the finish was just devastating.. - if you haven't downloaded this, take a break from porn and find it..

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