Monday, October 16, 2006

WWE Unforgiven 2006

1) Johnny Nitro vs. Jeff Hardy – 5 – This was a fairly acceptable match, albeit with quite a few miscommunications. Their match on Raw before this wasn’t as sloppy but it was entertaining as hell. This one was still entertaining but was pretty damn sloppy. As with all Johnny Nitro matches, it is mandatory that Melina interferes and interfere she did, as she took off one of her boots and whacked Hardy in the head with it. Um, yeah.

2) Umaga vs. Kane – 4 – This was pretty hard-hitting. I can’t remember a thing that happened except for the fact that their move sequences went like this: punch by Kane, shoulder-block by Umaga, repeat as desired. They did have some degree of stiffness to their punches and chops and blocks, but that kind of stuff seems out of place in WWE. Oh yeah, the finish? Double-countout to protect both men and have Umaga remain undefeated.

3) The Highlanders vs. The Spirit Squad – 3 – I half expected Mel Gibson to come out in his garb from Braveheart and yell “Freedom!” Anyway, the Squad is still annoying as all hell and needs to be shot out of a high speed cannon right into a brick wall. I love the Highlanders gimmick but they need to learn how to work a little better. That being said, this was still one of the better tag matches that has come out of the Raw brand in quite some time. For some unknown reason, the Squad retained to further de-value the titles.

4) Shawn Michaels & Triple H vs. The McMahons & The Big Show – Handicap Hell in a Cell Match – 2 – The new cage they used was pretty cool but the crossbar kept getting in the way of the wide shot. Why the hell do they keep putting Big Show in these stipulation matches? First, the lame Punjabi Prison, now this? He didn’t bump or sell worth a damn and the whole match came across as a total clusterfuck. Vince getting his face shoved up Big Show’s ass? Please!! I don’t want to see this bullshit mixed in wrestling, or sports entertainement, or whatever it is nowadays. Hell in a Cell is meant to be the ultimate feud-ended in WWE. Instead, it turned into an ultimate disaster and a twenty minute waste of time.

5) Trish Stratus vs. Lita – 4 – Aside from Mickie James and Victoria, Trish is the only other female who can put on a decent match. Lita is so broken down now, she shouldn’t even attempt to wrestle. I remember when she first came in, she was a freakin’ daredevil! Now, the only chances that she takes are when she tries a new position in bed. Trish won the match and the belt and retired. They made no mention of this the next night on Raw and magically the belt is now vacant.

6) Randy Orton vs. Carlito – 5 – I was expecting a show-stealing match, not a lame-ass squash. When they first announced this, it looked to me that Carlito was getting the big push he really deserved. Instead, they had Orton squash him on worldwide pay-per-view. Carlito moves back to the mid-card as a generic face to feud in silly matches with Nitro and Masters. Orton moves on to work with DX. Lame.

7) John Cena vs. Edge – TLC Match – 5 – I still hate Cena. The match they had at SummerSlam was much better and it seemed as if they finally clicked. Here, however, it seemed like the chemistry just wasn’t there. They kept the match pretty simple with Edge doing two big bumps and Cena doing one. The FU off the ladder through two tables was pretty cool but it lacked the fire of previous TLC matches. Cena’s the champ again and goes onto feud with … Umaga? What the fuck? Why do I even bother sometimes.

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