Wednesday, May 19, 2010

PWG Gentle Art of Making Enemies- 01/10/2009

1) The Cutler Brothers v. Los Luchas- 2
2) Austin Aries v. TJ Perkins- 6
3) Bobby Quance v. Joey Ryan- 3
4) Bryan Danielson v. Scott Lost- 4
5) El Generico v. Chuck Taylor - 3
6) The Young Bucks v. Davey Richards/ Roderick Strong-4

You're never going to get over being the worst possible imitation of the Ballard Brothers; this match sucked Dory Funk's wrinkled, massive love muscle. One of the first moves of the match was this crazy hurricanrana spot that led to a slow wear down. Guys were just waiting for spots, kicks from the top, I just hated every minute of this thing (went about 14); 2 legitimate cool things happend that should have ended the match but they didn't.

This was basically the reason i ordered the DVD and it didn't disappoint. Basic story was Aries being the strange veteran, and TJ the up and coming unique newcomer. Aries missed all his signature stuff once but would eventually hit it, as TJ would keep coming in time and time again with the quickness while Aries would pace himself and take breaks. All the selling was spot on, Aries took several really unecessary nasty spills, one being in the corner where most guys would have landed on their side missing a dropkick but he fell directly on his heavily geled head. Awesome KaShin armbar from TJP (who looked every bit as good here as against Ultimo in IGF this year) and the escapes into the Last Chancery were all different and all equally cool.

So Quance's whole backstory is he was a NAVY Seal (i'll check Wiki later to confirm) and hasn't seen or been in a wrestling match since 2002 but he looked fine for undercard filler. I liked how he took his outside bump, feet weren't first and it looked like the uncomfortable car crash it should be. He looked like a moron though doing the armbar TJ did in the match prior; this may not be popular Internet opinion, but Ryan totally blows. He naught sold one thing different from the other whether it be a punch, a clothesline, or a spinning perfect plex, a complete blank, just moving from spot to spot as if he was filling latte orders at a Starbucks. So, coming back to the 2002 thing, Quance starts mimicking WWE guys who were big at the time and before, Angle, Rock, Austin, and Michaels, which saw him miss Sweet Chin, then Ryan just ate his face up with one, perfect finish but no, they had to get a few more bruised millionaires in there; at least it wasn't 45 minutes long like Snow v. Corino in England.

Danielson looked funny selling all Lost's stuff which is a notch below everyone else, including an awkward punch from nowhere, god Lost looked stupid doing a sitting one footed dropkick from apron. Dumbass gets knocked over by Danielson getting whipped into chairs and tries to keep his beer from spilling, probably because it took him 2 hours of taking orders at a Wendy's drive thru to pay for it. Lost was full of gusto being thrown into each side of chairs but his mat work and silly punches reeked of backyard. Most of formula of match was basic Danielson 17 minute beatdown of midcard guy.

Is anyone in wrestling more physically revolting than Chuck Taylor? What was redeemable about this match has stupefied me. Generico really only works as undernoursihed ghastly pale guy trying to come from behind to win a match but against greasy childhater Taylor, it's like two nerds fighting over the better Magic card, and it's in front of people? Liked his big boot in corner though, Taylor was working spots like he was in a field hockey game, arms extended waiting for his big hiptoss sells, not into this.

I'm not a guy who likes the Young Bucks endless matches style where one great sequence will never lead to a cool finish, but instead will drone on like the insanely annoying fuckstain Glenn Beck. Richards and Strong seperate have their strenghts, Richards non stop work ethic and Strong's brutal back work but together they are bad for each other when combined. Instead of going spot by spot through this inane list of near falls I'll tell you the finish would have been that much greater if done about 7 minutes earlier. but, as a supervillain once sung, "A man's got to do.....what a man's got to do."

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