Wednesday, August 6, 2008

WCW SuperBrawl VI

1) Public Enemy v. Nasty Boys (Street Fight)- 5
2) Johnny B. Badd v. DDP- 4
3) Harlem Heat v. Sting/ Lex Luger- 4
4) One Man Gang v. Konnan- 2
5) Kevin Sullivan v. Brian Pillman (I Respect You Strap Match)- 1
6) Kevin Sullivan v. Arn Anderson ( I Respect You Strap Match) - 0
7) Road Warriors v. Sting/ Lex Luger- 3
8) Randy Savage v. Ric Flair ( Steel Cage Match)- 4
9) Hulk Hogan v. The Giant (Steel Cage Match)- 2

The opener was arguably the best thing on the show. The Nastys had absolutely no reservation about clocking PE with numerous stiff chair shots, sometimes when they weren't looking. Rocco took 3, count them 3 table bumps during this one while nobody else took any. This was fairly entertaining for the violence involved but not much else. Badd, as Brian pointed out, was working this one like a 25 minute epic war but Page looked like he was an extra in a 3 Stooges episode, bumping completely over the top. Kim got involved several times, including holding up a number sign after different moves. I heard she gave Page a "3" after their first sexual encounter. A surprise Tombstone finish cemented the score for this one. The Heat, while not their best performance, certainly weren't handing over to the veterans, especially when Booker forearmed Lex so hard he bumped and sold it.....the complete opposite of his intentions by the gaping jaw look on his face. Sting worked moderately well with both members but Lex just wasn't in the game; same old shit, different arena. Interference with a "steel plate" as Mean Gene called it later brought the score of this one down a little.

A Botchamania (look it up on Youtube) favorite- these styles mixed as well as Paris Hilton and having morals do. Konnan was trying to work Gang like he was fucking Heavy Metal but it wasn't working. Several spots were badly blown including the overthought finish. Our first strap match is the famous match where Pillman literally quits the company live on PPV, by screaming "I respect you, Bookerman." Although the Bookerman comment was edited out on this dub of a home video release; too bad. But, this isn't worth killing someone to see; nothing happens besides some scrapping on the ground for about 45 seconds. I give it a point for nostalgia sake. Arn comes out in some purple shorts with a faded button up shirt tucked into it and then gets goaded into taking over but after a few stiff cracks to the head from the strap, this one is over too. Flair comes out (looking even stupider than Arn because he has a T-shirt tucked into his wrestling trunks) and has them kiss and make up just to scream Hogan's name and put him over some more. RETCH!

You could turn the USA into a floating country on top of the egos in these last 3 matches. The tag affair immediately is marred by a Luger stalling that goes on for at least 6 or 7 minutes, presumbly to kill time that was needed for the strap match. There's no way he could have added that to his match, that would be ridiculous. The chemistry was really off here and Luger was his usual shitty self. Sting kept the pace up, for what he could, but the Warriors were looking for the door as soon as this one started. Probably the most entertaining thing about this match was Hawk seeking Luger out during the aftermatch brawl and just pummeling him unmercifully. The World Title match could have quite possibly been a good match, but we'll never know because of all the bullshit technical problems. Camera shots of the mats when wrestlers were doing things, far away pan shots, and just bad management of the cameras stole much of the luster from this bout because Savage took several brutal bumps and Flair and he traded some good chops and punches throughout. The finish is even hazy because of the bad production; but a malfunctioning cage door that was locked midway through the match was easily broke open by Elizabeth, for what it's worth. Hogan's performance in the main event was as flaccid as his miniscule penis on his honeymoon. We actually saw Linda Hogan in the crowd of this show at one point, dressed like a motorcycle slut. Giant took a lot of head shots into the cage but it was a little repetitive after 10, like they didn't know what else to do. Hogan didn't take a bump one and merely punched his way through a really shoddy cage match. Hogan in the end could barely get out of the damn thing. And then, in the biggest ego stroke since Vince made out with Stacy Keibler, Hogan fights off the Dungeon of Doom, all 8 members, singlehandedly. Nothing about this show was super.

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