Monday, January 6, 2014

Rave vs. Curry vs. Sabin vs. Devine vs. Kaz

First post of the new year! Remember kids, never hand over, unless it's your WWE box sets or 8x10 glossy prints of the Toryumon roster, 'cause demz ours!!!

Jimmy Rave vs. Curry Man vs. Chris Sabin vs. Johnny Devine vs. Kaz - King of the Mountain Match - TNA iMPACT! 6/5/08 - 5

Yes, as a preview for their upcoming PPV they did a complete KotM match on free TV even with goofy penalty box. Curry Man firing up Sabin early. Get it? Because curry is hot? About 60 sec. in Devine does a crazy moonsault off of the penalty box to the floor! I didn't see that coming. Holy shit that was nuts and dangerous and probably the coolest thing Johnny ever did (not just in his career, in his life, slightly nudging out that beer run he pulled off as a sophomore). Now they're using ladders. Sabin and Kaz both have so much more pop to their stuff just over five years ago. Kaz forever earned a spot in my heart after that insanely stiff kick to Bischoff's kid's face in Lethal Lockdown a couple years ago. I think Tenay just re-imagined history harder than Sarah Polley in Stories We Tell. Such a strange gimmick match. You win by hanging a big X above the ring like you're putting the star on top of your Christmas tree? That penalty box looks black and hard. No wonder Christy Hemme is eyeing it. Kaz rides a ladder off the box into the ring like he's sledding. Except Rosebud never chaffed your inner-thighs. Devine did history's weakest, most stupidest looking back elbow ever gingerly stepping backwards off the lowest ladder rung. Curry is usually such a joke character but he actually got off some stuff that made him look semi-competent. Kaz wins by playing giant-sized tic-tac-toe hanging a stupid puffy alphabet letter amid all the carnage. What a joyous train wreck of suck.

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