Thursday, December 25, 2008

WWE Tribute to the Troops 12/20/08

For the record, I've never liked one of these "Tribute to the Troops" shows. I'd rather be on the frontline myself than have to relive that Michaels vs. HHH match from a couple years ago from Baghdad. I will say it looks spectacular in HD, but let's see if the wrestling is as deplorable as years past...

1. Jeff Hardy, CM Punk, and R-Truth vs. Jim Morrison, The Miz, and JBL - 2

- wait, is that solider wearing a Dr. Wagner Jr. mask?
- hardy's face looks like a landmine went off on it.. oh, that's just his random facepaint
- nice forearms by JM on Truth in the corner
- triple planchas by the faces
- R-Truth gets a cameo in The Wrestler, a Slammy, and a trip to Baghdad? stellar year
- good sell by JM on stellar powerslam by Punk
- Hardy's pink belt is very patriotic
- r-truth's intensity makes up for jeff's lackadaisical shit
- swanton bomb on JBL for fin

Conclusion: A sloppy, rushed, and entirely forgettable six-man tag. JBL getting pinned so easily doesn't fly with how he's been booked the last year. Miz's over the top selling was one of the only things I liked. I wish they'd have given this fifteen more minutes and eliminated some of the poorly produced sappy music videos of divas in military vehicles.

The next segment saw Cryme Tyme come out in Santa suits and ask the dedicated soldiers the question all of us back home really wanted answered, "What's really hood?" This was an excuse to get the divas out in skimpy outfits to toss out WWE loot to the crowd. It's nice to know someone's in a foxhole somewhere wearing a Batista tee.

2. Big Show, Chris Jericho, Randy Orton vs. Batista, Rey Mysterio, and John Cena - 3

- Batista and Orton start basic
- Jericho stomps big Dave like trying to put out a burning American flag
- Show catches Rey while doing 619 on Jericho and gingerly drops him outside the ring
- Lawler says this show is "even bigger than WrestleMania" which is a lie
- nice seeing Jericho and Rey working spots together again, not so nice Jericho and Show's acting when their team dissolves
- Dave is as awkwardly stiff as a lizard left out in the desert sand for a month
- double 619 leads to a Batisa Bomb on Jericho and FU on Orton for the fin

Conclusion: The stiffest action over there is the unfair treatment and abuse of detainees in the Bagram Air Base. This match was better structured than the opener, but truncated and shortened so much that in analogous terms was the size of Vince McMahon's fetid penis.

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