Monday, March 9, 2009

WCW Monday Nitro- 09/13/1999

1) Chris Benoit v. Dean Malenko- 6
2) Erik Watts v. Disco Inferno- 1
3) Silver King v. Norman Smiley- 2
4) The Bluebloods v. The Windham Brothers- 4
5) Harlem Heat v. Brian Knobs/ Hugh Morrus (Tag Title)- 3
6) Insane Clown Posse v. Lenny & Lodi- 3
7) Rick Steiner v. Chris Benoit (TV Title)- 3
8) Eddie Guerrero v. Perry Saturn- 4
9) Berlyn v. Buff Bagwell- 4
10) Sting/ Lex Luger v. Bret Hart/ Hulk Hogan- 4

Our opening match was far and away the best thing on this show. While it didn't get much time, they filled it with non-stop WRESTLING! Reversals a plenty, almost got ahead of themselves there were so many. I'm glad they didn't try and pull off all those old Eddie-Dean ECW ones , instead just using really good, clean technique. Of course there were suplexes too, good ones. Saturn & Shane Douglas, the other Revolution members, came down to ringside but I didn't like their attempt at manufactured crowd heat; who cares what those two clowns think anyways? This match was supposed to be for a World Title Shot later on that night, so they made it feel like that. Really cool reversal to a superplex caps this TV classic off. 2nd match was all about cool new age offense.....and making it look like shit. Watts made a powerbomb into the corner look as effective as a People's Elbow. Both guys were preening & posing throughout this turd too; grab a hold and wrestle, you jerk stains. Sid, mercilessly, came down and beat up both guys. He did the same thing in the next match, which mainly only featured Silver King throwing some wicked kicks, & Norman getting his Big Wiggle on. Get down, girl, go ahead, get down.

The next match featured a lot of stuff I love (tag wrestling, Barry, the bluebloods) okay, I love everything in it except Kendall Windham. There were some mis-communications but not much, Bluebloods controlled nicely with Kendall in at one point & Barry had some flashbacks to the glory days of '87 with missed elbowdrops and arm drag reversals. Curt Henning (smiling big in full Redneck regalia) needlessly interefered for the win. The Heat versus the Nastys back in mid-90's was a great feud; this match was not. Stevie Ray didn't look thrilled to sell for big Hugh on power moves at all, thing I liked is they kept Booker out of the ring while they worked his brother, so when he came in at the end for the big comeback it worked nicely. Knobs must have smelled like Cheetos & KY jelly because Heat tried to avoid him at all costs. What a novelty; the ICP wrestling! That'll sell some tickets. Guarantee Bischoff didn't even know he had them on the payroll at the time. The Lenny/ Lodi thing was good at this time, and WWE probably could have gotten some good mileage out of it, but not this fed; they jobbed them out to really, really, really, really, really, really, really bad recording "artists (used lightly)." Violent J's clothesline were as wooden as Tree-beard's cock. Tony Schiavone claming Shaggy 2 Dope was a great cruiserweight made me want to stick a medieval battleaxe in my ear. Violent J's moonsault was almost as much of an eyesore as his ridiculous getup. All in all, Lenny pulled them through a passable match.

Well, looks like Benoit won't get that World Title match after all, due to the main event. Nice way to swerve your fans. Benoit v. Sting really tickled my taint but this looks just as good. Steiner is giving Benoit the business with a brutal powerslam and a release German suplex that most assuredly contributed to Benoit snapping & murdering his whole family. Crappy rollup gives Benoit the TV belt (if anyone was counting). Eddie & P-Sat both have their posse's down with them and the match is fairly enjoyable. They try some reversal stuff too, like the opener and for the most part have a good flow. Best spot was Eddie rolling up into a cradle out of a German suplex attempt. Berlyn is another in the long list of overhyped people WCW tried to use, but in the end he's still Alex Wright, so there you have it. He & Buff daddy put together a complete TV match, with the requisite resthold spots, gaudy punches & outside intereference. That being said, good for what it was, a platform for Berlyn to get over. Finish was really weak though; a falling neckbreaker- how are we supposed to believe that could beat anybody?

Main event featured four top stars probably of all time. Luger is wearing jeans & a t-shirt, another shot in the arm for WCW's credibility. Hart worked at top level here, but he's the only one. All his moves were crisp, whether it was a simple legdrop, his rope running, or a chinlock, all looked good. Sting sold big for him too, but he was supposed to be a heel here but made absolutely no attempt at getting any kind of heel heat. Hogan was just kind of there, not really a factor, although he was doing these little rabbit punches that resembled my 1 year old daughter getting excited and flailing her hand, about the same force. Luger's bumps were downright ugly. Now, the finish: There's a lot of little legendary moments in wrestling within our group of friends and one of them is Sting getting his face ripped off by a bat shot from Elizabeth back at Starrcade 1999. Luger breaks up Bret's sharpshooter with a bat shot to the face here and it's just as devastating. And the camera is right there next to it! It's unbelieveable. Crazy ending to a so-so Nitro from a period when so-so was frickin' outstanding.

Other Angles Featured:
- Ric Flair returns, cuts a great promo, gets beat up by Sting & Luger
- Berlyn arrives with 3 limos & entourage
- Nitro Girl contest, hosted by Rikki Rachman, Kimberly Page, & Spice (V-man's favorite Nitro girl)
- J.J. Dillon finds out Lex Luger lied about being cleared to wrestle
- Long Sid promo after interrupting 2 matches
- Goldberg interrupts Jerry Flynn to call out Sid, then spears & jackhammers him to hell & back
- Revolution video
- Really good Sting montage of his whole career

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