Thursday, December 6, 2007

WWF Royal Rumble 1992

1 New Foundation v. Orient Express- 6
2 Roddy Piper v. The Mountie- 3
3 Bushwhackers v. Beverly Brothers- 1
4 Legion of Doom v. Natural Disasters- 3
5 30 Man Royal Rumble- 8

I love a good tag match, the back and forth, the cutting the ring in half, the matching tights; there's just something very appealing about it to me. This one wasn't bad. It had all of those elements integrated into it, but it felt like the Orients were outmatched through the whole thing. Anvil never struggled with them at all and even though Owen played great face getting beat down, he seemed over qualified as well. Tanaka threw some nasty kicks but his partner Kato ( a guy in mask with really wrinkled skin) looked like a gangly teenager from off the street. He didn't have any good offense and his team suffered for it. Piper's first singles title win is a major milestone even if it comes from this 5 minute dud with perennial goofball Mountie. Piper's punches are real enough, but Mountie's sells are more like he's running from an angry wasp than selling real pain from getting a knuckle sandwhich in the cheek bone. Jimmy Hart tries to get some "heat" by attempting to take a bump, but he looks like a scared child in the process.

I love a good tag match and that's why i hated this one. All 4 of these guys were pansies! Despite all the obvious Bushwhacker homoerotic comedy spots, you still had two teams in there that should, by now, know what they are doing but the Whackers were selling forearms to the back like they slipped on a banana peel. The Beverlys brought absolutely zero realism to their movements as well, opting instead to perform at least 4 double ax handles from the top buckle (which was the fin). the only moment that got a rise out of me was when The Genius slapped Jamison and he sold it afterwards by looking at the camera and saying "He slapped me...really hard....and it hurt." Sometimes the most obvious things can be funny. Animal and Hawk were continuing their dominant ways and just bulled over the Disasters. Both of these big mammoths brought no teamwork to this match, but Quake effectively sold everything being done to him with believable facials. A countout finish where Typhoon outsmarts two other men doesn't fly on this place i like to call Earth.

The famous 92 Rumble match where Ric Flair went over 60 minutes and wins the WWF title- it's a damn fine Rumble and has some really good ebbs and flows during it. It essentially broken up into 2 sections- you have a lot of midcard guys coming in at the beginning, then they all go out except Flair then your top tier guys all fill in during the 2nd half of the Rumble. Some highlights from the first half were Haku's piledriver on Bulldog, Tito's flying forearms, the close up on Flair and Kerry Von Erich when they face off, and Bossman's homicidal elimination, probably one of the sickest in Rumble history. The 2nd half featured a lot of big brawny brawlers, including Duggan, Snuka, Undertaker and Piper. Slaughter took a great elimination during this section and Flair giving Taker a low blow and him no selling it was a funny moment. Hogan and Sid's chemistry was lacking at the end and even though Flair wins, it's almost as Hogan gives it to him, so it's a little soured to me, much like Hogan's marriage and his daughter's proverbial "cherry" after WCW's the Demon popped it like a bubble backstage at a Nitro in Lowell, MA.

2 comments:

Brian said...

that must have been the 1/7/00 nitro in lowell with that really tasty Perry Saturn & Dean Malenko versus Chavo Guerrero Jr. & Asya match..

wait a sec.. - upon second thought.. that would have made brooke hogan around 11 years old.. - ewww jess, you sick fuck!

Adam said...

This is definitely the best Rumble match they've done.