Sunday, March 19, 2006

HWA: War Games- December 2003

An Indy show War Games with no cage? Yeah, I'm going to love this.

1 Ala Hussien v. Big Jim- 3- I have an uncle we call Big Jim, but he's no wrestler. God, I don't even want to imagine him in tights or in anything that's not oversized and loose fitting so I don't ever catch a glimpse of what his true figure is. I love him, but he's pretty damn large and I don't want to know the contours of his largeness. Hussien bumped twice good and that was it.
2 The Hussla v. Mike Desire- 4- These guys tried a little more than the first match. Hussla has been a HWA midcarder for like 6 years and he doesn't do anything different today than he did when he first started: maybe that's a clue, Mr. Hussla?
3 80 Man Battle Royal- 1- I simply give this a one because people were actually wrestling. The camera shot of this match was horrible. I had no idea what was happening in the 2nd ring and I had no idea who was really in the match or leaving it. I couldn't tell you one thing that happened.
4 AJ Sparxx v. Helena Heavenly( Hardcore Match)- 2- I don't know why Les Thatcher thought anyone would enjoy this. Maybe he was heavily medicated. Actually, I'm quite sure he was heavily medicated. I don't know who won this or how, and it matters as little as my vote for John Kerry in 2004.
5 Crazy J/ Lotus v. JT Stahr/ TJ Dalton- 4- Stahr looked like Shannon Moore, and Lotus looked like Lance Storm if Lance Storm had ICP tattoos on his ribcage. I didn't really like this match. I've seen J & Lotus before and they are very acrobatical, and the match had a few good spots, but it's the bad ones we all remember, and it had it's share of those two. I give them a four not for the match they presented me, but for the the match they couldn't make happen.
6 War Games( Team BPW v. Team HWA) - 4 - This match was such a mish mosh of HWA wrestlers pretending to be BPW wrestlers, I couldn't tell who was on who's team. The final participant, Chet the Jet was locked out of the match by his brother Dean, by interlocking the guard rail together. If only Chet would have learned to climb fences, he would have been more than aptly prepared to scale the two foot barricade keeping him from his wrestling destiny. Such a pity. Overall, not a good show by any means of the imagination, and I can make up a story simply by looking at a PEZ dispenser. Ew, Burn.

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