1. Road Warrior Animal vs. Matt Hardy - (J:1 B:2)
Jessie: man, Animal has fallen far from grace. I was just watching a tape the other day where he could put the tips of his boots in a guy's face with a dropkick. In this match, he's lucky to hit Matt's small and curlies. Hardy brings stiff and realistic punches to Hobbitland, as he does everywhere else. He plays up a leg injury, one of his signatures and Animal makes it look shoddy as an invention from the Dad from "Gremlins." He botches a dragon screw leg whip for the finish and barely covers Matt. Really disappointing.
Brian: At this point, Animal had a harder time trying to fit into an XXL t-shirt, and likely put more efforts towards such activities than he did having competent matches. Hardy generally works hard to add touches of realism to his sells, but I’d rather watch him as teenager taking awkward bumps on a trampoline than participating in the further diminishing of a legend like Animal in a throwaway bout.
2 Finlay vs. Lashley - (J:4 B:3)
Jessie: Before the match, we are treated to a really funny Lashley segment where he seeps charisma, For the 1st time in recorded history. He walks down to a beach and says "Hogan, The Rock, Bobby Lashley" as a pickup line and this large chested Kiwi girl practically throws herself on his large black cock. As far as the match, Finlay during most of 2006 was paired with Lashley in a feud to school Lashley, which was pretty effective. In this match, the Irishman would rather play folly to the loud and obnoxious crowd. There were some good exchanges from them and you can see the familiarity helping Lashley feel comfortable with Fit. The match isn't very hard hitting, and is short, but what they did was believable.
Brian: I’m with Jessie and that I was really amused be the video package showing Lashley beachside being smooth. The match itself is fairly decent, as Lashely was in full pupil mode, soaking up the knowledge of veteran statesmen Finlay. This wasn’t bad, per se, but doesn’t fair well when compared to some of their actual televised bouts, thus the weaker grade.
3. Orlando Jordan vs. Boogeyman - (J:1 B:1)
Jessie: OJ looks bad, but Boogey far surpasses him. He can't even brawl properly. He can't splash in the corner. He can't sell a punch without shaking like a fool. He can't wrestle. But he goes over. I won't insult your intelligence and ask you to explain.
Brian: I was in a minority that saw some potential in Jordan, but he squandered his opportunity, deeming it more important to take drunken pictures in photo booths with other gay men than being at shows. Boogeyman has improved at this point, as evidenced by some of the recent ECW stuff, but at this point he was one of the worst workers in the business. While still limited, he’s now acquired the knowledge to try to make his stuff compatible with an opponent’s, and pacing issues, etc. I wouldn’t be surprised if later that night Jordan tried to put Boogeyman’s “worm” in his mouth.
4. Booker T v. Chris Benoit - (J:4 B:4)
Jessie: These guys have had wonderful matches in the past, even during this run, but you could call this match a Fed Ex death match because this was mailed in from way back in America. Booker is usually one of the few guys to take Benoit's Germans like a real man, but here he settles for half assed, comedic sells. Benoit doesn't even bring the stiff and you can see his desire to hurt his family in his eyes. Don't you wish he just would have taken out his rage out on The Miz, or even Vince? Wouldn't have been so tragic. I honestly don't remember the finish because this was a plain match that didn't suffer from mistakes just didn't benefit from passion.
Brian: These guys have built a legacy of stellar work together, sadly, this ranked near the bottom of their omnibus. Booker seemed distracted, probably crunching numbers in his head, wondering why $5 goes missing at his urban clothing shop back in Texas every time Jerome closes. Benoit ate a scissors kick nicely at one point, and seeing Booker tap cleanly was a pleasant way to end this forgettable bout.
5. Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio - (J:5 B:5)
Jessie: The only match that seemed to put it in 2nd gear. Orton's selling these days is masterful and you can see hints of it here in this match, after his awesome sell of a tornado headscissors. Rey can look lethargic now with all his added steroid weight, but his offense calls for him to put something into it, or else he gets hurt, so even his half- assed stuff looks pretty good. I don't think these two styles mesh well but both are great workers and put together a match that's almost worth seeking out.
Brian: These guys had a match on Smackdown! in ’06 that was unanimously praised as a MOTY candidate. I don’t necessarily agree with Jessie that their styles don’t mesh well, as Rey as of late, much like Shawn Michaels has throughout his career, has made it his modus operandi to adapt to other guys. This didn’t have the drama or storytelling of their aforementioned classic, but was still largely good under the context of being a house show match. Orton’s sells were extreme, bordering on the asinine, but just finding that perfect balance before slipping over the edge.
6. Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker vs. Mark Henry - (J:4 B:4)
Jessie: Everytime I see Angle wrestle now and unload with his barrage of 5000 punches per match, I can't help but think of Brian's review where he likened his motion to that of a grade school child applying a Slap Bracelet to their wrist. The resemblance is uncanny. Mark Henry was a big ole' tub of mutated lard. He was slow and didn't really add anything to this match. Angle and Taker had some good spots together by now, but they don't really blend in well with a thrown together 3 way. Taker looked pretty focused, but what can you do with a gorilla and a coke head in a foreign country? Well, you can't watch "Two and a Half Men" and go to bed early, I know that.
Brian: I don’t think Henry’s as useless as most, just like Orton he had an unbelievable match with Rey Mysterio on Smackdown! in ’06, and just the other night I saw him make a Batista spear look absolutely vicious. Still, nothing was there to save this retched excuse for a main event. Undertaker and Angle had some ridiculously good singles matches together; both forcing the other guy to rise to another level, but none of that passion or dedication was showcased here. These guys were on autopilot, so much so that in fact, they metaphorically wrecked this thing right into a building. There were some decent reversals of Angle’s submissions, but most of the exchanges in this match were hackneyed, and the finish was a complete mess with a unrealistic ref bump, etc.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
WCCW TV - 1/15/83
1) Buddy Roberts vs. Brian Adias - 2
2) Michael Hayes vs. Al Madril - 3
3) Andre the Giant vs. Terry Gordy vs. King Kong Bundy vs. Bugsy McGraw vs. Wild Bill Irwin vs. Kerry Von Erich - Six Man Elimination Match - 4
Well, this was basically just a Freebird showcase. Adias was about as pasty as a ball of dough at a cake shop. Roberts wasn't really impressive but had a nice look about him. Afterwards, a video of Bill Mercer visiting the Freebirds at home and asking questions about the finish of the Flair/Kerry cage match from Reunion Arena. While it was a fun little package, the background music was edited over which left some of the dialogue hard to hear.
The bout with Hayes and Madril was a little more action packed than the opener but still wasn't much more than a showcase for Hayes. The reason this gets a better grade than the opener was because the selling from both guys was way better than the first bout. Hayes hit a piledriver and pulled Madril up from a pin followed by an attack from Jose Lothario who challenged Hayes to a match.
A six-man match like the main even was a rarity back in the day. It was basically a six-man battle royal but the talent array was so interesting that it warranted a decent rating. Also, seeing Andre in World Class was a treat as well. The main story of the match was focusing on the Gordy/Von Erich issue that had spawned from the finish of the Flair/Von Erich cage match the previous week. Andre dominated Gordy who eliminated Kerry early on. The match dragged at points but was still cool to watch with the talent involved.
Overall, this episode focused mainly on building the Freebirds up as threats to the Von Erichs with the main point being the finish of the cage match from the previous week. The Freebirds/Von Erich feud would eventually turn World Class into the hottest territory of the 1980s and all the seeds that were planted in the previous episode were expounded upon here. I would definitely recommend watching the Flair/Kerry cage match before viewing this in order to know exactly what's happening.
2) Michael Hayes vs. Al Madril - 3
3) Andre the Giant vs. Terry Gordy vs. King Kong Bundy vs. Bugsy McGraw vs. Wild Bill Irwin vs. Kerry Von Erich - Six Man Elimination Match - 4
Well, this was basically just a Freebird showcase. Adias was about as pasty as a ball of dough at a cake shop. Roberts wasn't really impressive but had a nice look about him. Afterwards, a video of Bill Mercer visiting the Freebirds at home and asking questions about the finish of the Flair/Kerry cage match from Reunion Arena. While it was a fun little package, the background music was edited over which left some of the dialogue hard to hear.
The bout with Hayes and Madril was a little more action packed than the opener but still wasn't much more than a showcase for Hayes. The reason this gets a better grade than the opener was because the selling from both guys was way better than the first bout. Hayes hit a piledriver and pulled Madril up from a pin followed by an attack from Jose Lothario who challenged Hayes to a match.
A six-man match like the main even was a rarity back in the day. It was basically a six-man battle royal but the talent array was so interesting that it warranted a decent rating. Also, seeing Andre in World Class was a treat as well. The main story of the match was focusing on the Gordy/Von Erich issue that had spawned from the finish of the Flair/Von Erich cage match the previous week. Andre dominated Gordy who eliminated Kerry early on. The match dragged at points but was still cool to watch with the talent involved.
Overall, this episode focused mainly on building the Freebirds up as threats to the Von Erichs with the main point being the finish of the cage match from the previous week. The Freebirds/Von Erich feud would eventually turn World Class into the hottest territory of the 1980s and all the seeds that were planted in the previous episode were expounded upon here. I would definitely recommend watching the Flair/Kerry cage match before viewing this in order to know exactly what's happening.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
RF Video Shoot Interview - Too Cold Scorpio
I’ve been a big fan of Too Cold since the early 90’s so I was excited to watch his shoot interview. Overall, I definitely enjoyed the experience, laughing out loud several times throughout, but I also think it could have been a lot better. Too Cold is candid, not afraid to speak his mind, and never seems disinterested or gives half-assed answers.
Let’s talk about the pros and cons. The pros are somewhat covered above, but to go into more detail, I really enjoyed Scorpio not holding back, as well as hearing behind the scenes stories and his thoughts on the people he enjoyed working with. There was also a ton of drug chat, which I found hilarious. The cons were that it only ran roughly 90 minutes, was void of any in-ring footage, and glosses over a lot of shit, especially his WWF stint, which was treated as an afterthought.
Here are some highlights from some of Scorpio’s comments for those that don’t want to shell out cash to see it firsthand:
WCW – He said Bill Watts was a racist. He said Buff Bagwell was a bitch and if he saw him in public he’d beat his ass. Said Sting was upset that Scorpio had a scorpion on his tights. He kept hinting towards heat with Pillman, but didn’t want to disrespect the dead. He talked about the Arn/Sid scissor incident. He said Missy Hyatt, after all the cosmetic surgery, still looked like shit. His first impression of Paul E. Dangerously was that he was a bitch. Talked about the “cocaine party”, and how, while touring an island, Steamboat and Flair’s wives wanted his dick. Said it wasn’t his fault Foley lost his ear. He said he beat Road Warrior Hawk’s ass in Korea in a brawl. He said Flair conspired to have him fired.
Mexico – Said Mil Mascaras was a prick, El Canek and Santo were cool, and he liked working with guys like Negro Casas, Silver King, and the Villanos. Said it was real easy to get drugs there. Said he worked Andre the Giant, and after only one Andre punch he was nearly knocked out, so afterward he respected everything he had done in the business. Said he’d hang with Yokozuna down there because he could roll the best blunts.
ECW – Said the drug scene there was completely crazy. He enjoyed working with The Sandman, who he said was crazy as hell, and enjoyed knocking the shit out of people. He also gave props to Sabu, Jericho, the Pitbulls, and Rob Van Dam. He noted on Shane Douglas never doing a job for him, and said he was a piece of shit. He talked trash about Curtis Hughes. He said Tommy Dreamer didn’t belong in a ring. He said Taz lived his gimmick too much, and was deserving of the broken neck he got. He said Heyman still owed him money, but overall, he said it was one of his favorite places to work.
Japan – He talked about his early days there in the New Japan Dojo being a “young boy.” Talked about his early matches, including getting beaten down by Eddy Guerrero, Finlay, and Benoit. He put over guys like Misawa and Taue as legends, and said of the young breed, he really enjoys watching Marufuji and KENTA. He was real proud of NOAH.
WWF – He said Shawn Michaels could kiss his ass. He said most of their guys are overrated. He had to leave WWF originally due to a lot of personal problems, stemming from issues like his marriage, drug abuse, etc. He enjoyed getting the opportunity to work against Vader.
Overall, this was a really entertaining shoot; I got to see a different side of Scorpio, and had a lot of fun listening to his stories. It’s been awhile since I’ve really cared to seek out shoots, and only ever seen a handful, but after viewing this one, I’d like to see more. I’d also like to see Scorpio’s allegedly gigantic cock inside Stephanie McMahon for her father giving Too Cold a raw deal.
Let’s talk about the pros and cons. The pros are somewhat covered above, but to go into more detail, I really enjoyed Scorpio not holding back, as well as hearing behind the scenes stories and his thoughts on the people he enjoyed working with. There was also a ton of drug chat, which I found hilarious. The cons were that it only ran roughly 90 minutes, was void of any in-ring footage, and glosses over a lot of shit, especially his WWF stint, which was treated as an afterthought.
Here are some highlights from some of Scorpio’s comments for those that don’t want to shell out cash to see it firsthand:
WCW – He said Bill Watts was a racist. He said Buff Bagwell was a bitch and if he saw him in public he’d beat his ass. Said Sting was upset that Scorpio had a scorpion on his tights. He kept hinting towards heat with Pillman, but didn’t want to disrespect the dead. He talked about the Arn/Sid scissor incident. He said Missy Hyatt, after all the cosmetic surgery, still looked like shit. His first impression of Paul E. Dangerously was that he was a bitch. Talked about the “cocaine party”, and how, while touring an island, Steamboat and Flair’s wives wanted his dick. Said it wasn’t his fault Foley lost his ear. He said he beat Road Warrior Hawk’s ass in Korea in a brawl. He said Flair conspired to have him fired.
Mexico – Said Mil Mascaras was a prick, El Canek and Santo were cool, and he liked working with guys like Negro Casas, Silver King, and the Villanos. Said it was real easy to get drugs there. Said he worked Andre the Giant, and after only one Andre punch he was nearly knocked out, so afterward he respected everything he had done in the business. Said he’d hang with Yokozuna down there because he could roll the best blunts.
ECW – Said the drug scene there was completely crazy. He enjoyed working with The Sandman, who he said was crazy as hell, and enjoyed knocking the shit out of people. He also gave props to Sabu, Jericho, the Pitbulls, and Rob Van Dam. He noted on Shane Douglas never doing a job for him, and said he was a piece of shit. He talked trash about Curtis Hughes. He said Tommy Dreamer didn’t belong in a ring. He said Taz lived his gimmick too much, and was deserving of the broken neck he got. He said Heyman still owed him money, but overall, he said it was one of his favorite places to work.
Japan – He talked about his early days there in the New Japan Dojo being a “young boy.” Talked about his early matches, including getting beaten down by Eddy Guerrero, Finlay, and Benoit. He put over guys like Misawa and Taue as legends, and said of the young breed, he really enjoys watching Marufuji and KENTA. He was real proud of NOAH.
WWF – He said Shawn Michaels could kiss his ass. He said most of their guys are overrated. He had to leave WWF originally due to a lot of personal problems, stemming from issues like his marriage, drug abuse, etc. He enjoyed getting the opportunity to work against Vader.
Overall, this was a really entertaining shoot; I got to see a different side of Scorpio, and had a lot of fun listening to his stories. It’s been awhile since I’ve really cared to seek out shoots, and only ever seen a handful, but after viewing this one, I’d like to see more. I’d also like to see Scorpio’s allegedly gigantic cock inside Stephanie McMahon for her father giving Too Cold a raw deal.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
WWE Vengeance '02 Co-Review
1. Bubba Ray and Spike Dudley vs. Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero - Tables Elimination Match (J:3 B:6)
Jessie: So this is what we have: Eddie at his greasiest, Benoit at his most roided out, Bubba, not being obese, and Spike, just there (like the rest of his career) It's so weird to see these two on a team and know five years later they're both dead and one is disgraced. With that said, they are basically dissecting the Dudleys throughout this match. They have great team work and Eddie has legit heel heat from the crowd. This match is basically an extended squash for the first ten minutes or so. Bubba was taking some great corner bumps and was letting the heels pound him well. These scientific guys have a hard time with the tables, with Tazz even calling Guerrero out saying "he's having a hell of a wrestling match with this table" Eddie yelled back at him even. Eddie looks like an inept Church fundraiser organizer, just botching the table setups left and right. All you need to know is all of the table spots are really sloppy. Spike puts himself through a table as Eddie's chin hits like he was falling asleep in study hall. Benoit drops Spike violently through some wood from a press slam, then Benoit goes ass first through a table with a Bubba Bomb, yeah, it looked uglier than it sounds. The Heels were really aggressive, as was Bubba, but there was a lot of dead air in this match, and the technicians definitley struggled with the concept of setting up tables. I have a feeling as a regular match this would be better, but since it must be graded as a tables, they failed badly at the notion.
Brian: I obviously enjoyed this a lot more than Jessie. My only complaint, and the reason it doesn't warrant a higher grade, is the table bumps that the match was based upon weren't that special. But, the bulk of the match was really enjoyable for me, it had energy and pacing that really reminded me of an old ECW Arena match. They gave it some ample time, and the guys didn't seem real concerned about squeezing in excess stuff. I think Jessie nailed it when he said the team of Benoit and Guerrero were "dissecting" their opponents, as they were just ruthless, being real aggressive and dominating. I agree with Jessie on Bubba Ray taking some good bumps throughout, eating a lot of stuff right on his face, and Spike took a bump into the stairs like a trooper. I think the difficulty setting up tables wasn't a real distraction, as I've seen ECW originals like Sabu and Sandman waste way more time. As Jessie noted, once the tables started smashing, things took a turn for the worse. It would have been nice to see Benoit eliminate Spike using one of his more patented moves, as just doing a press slam seemed like a waste of a big spot. Still, my quibbles with it aside, this was arguably the most fun match to watch of the entire show.
2. Jamie Knoble vs. Billy Kidman (J:5 B:5)
Brian: This was good, both guys looked prepared and as if they knew each other well before this. As it progressed, there were some great near falls. Kidman's arm got worked over a bunch, which he sold commendably, including a sick bump into a ringpost. Some of Kidman's strikes were weaker than the daiquiri it'd take nowadays to get Torrie Wilson to let you pee on her spread open buttocks. As it continued, things started seeming less cool because of their smoothness, and actually worse for it, as parts looked more like telegraphing than fighting. The tigerbomb finish was a nice touch.
Jessie: Huh? Right at the beginning, both men tumble out of the ring. Okay, I'll pretend that didn't happen. These guys have some good chemistry and Noble works a neat spot where he uses Nidia as a distraction to try and break Kidman's arm. Kidman's Crash Test Dummy-like spill into the post was pretty swank. Kidman is selling his arm pretty well, acting as if it hurts, but not as bad as Knoble thinks. I'd agree with Brian as the match begins to feel like a training school spot session more than a PPV match as everything they do seems nice and easy, no aggressiveness to it. I think that was always Kidman's biggest flaw: no aggression. They botch a Tornado DDT type move that the announcers even acknowledge, but the ending sequence works well and you had the feeling either guy could have won.
3. Jeff Hardy vs. William Regal (J:2 B:3)
Jessie: Regal was being deliciously evil in this , with some neat knee drop variations and such. Hardy was all over the place, walking around like the drunk guy you are sure is going to walk right through the bonfire at a party. Regal's stuff is supposed to look painful, but Hardy can't sell it the way it needs to be sold; his facials scream "I just hurt myself on a dare to jump a garbage can with a pogo stick" painful, not "my head just absorbed another man's boot!" They botched some really silly stuff outside and Regal looked noticeably pissed. A strange arm drag move and a roll up later and it's over. These styles went together as well as sweaters and chainsaws.
Brian: Jeff Hardy's hair was greener than Doc Samson's. Regal was dishing out some stiff clubbing shots, but later, his "half-nelson back throw" as Tazz called it was insipid. Regal blocked Hardy's "Swanton Bomb" by putting up his knees, subsequently, Hardy sold it like a kid disdained by opening up his fridge to no Mountain Dew Code Red left in it. Hardy got the quick victory with a roll-up, keeping some of Regal's heat, but still turning in a stinker. This was designed to be a throwaway match, but that doesn't mean it couldn't have been good.
4. John Cena vs. Chris Jericho (J:5 B:4)
Brian: This was pre-hip-hop Cena and his 1st PPV match. Cena was still green here, and instead of being a ring general, Jericho seemed bored and lackadaisical. But fuck, we didn't want laissez-faire we wanted some action! Jericho was in the corner when he blocked a Cena splash by hitting a superb dropkick off the 2nd turnbuckle. John Cena sold a bulldog like Daniel Stern in Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. Cena countered a cocky submission with a quick roll-up to score the upset victory. I'd like to see these guys work together again, but you can avoid this like would an ROH fan in public.
Jessie : I give this an extra point for the crazy dropkick Jericho pulled off that exploded Cena's stomach like an atom bomb! A really cool spot. Cena was really green in his Ohio State colored trunks (yet they were in Michigan and he was the face?) and a lot of what he did was telegraphed big time. Jericho took his time to get the crowd behind the near falls but he pulled it out in the end with a good upset finish. Jericho brought nothing top shelf, hell even really middle shelf and pretty much used his most basic tools to help guide Cena through this one. His sleeper drop looked like someone slipping while ice skating and grabbing the person next to them for support. Yeah, Cena's faces are the most over the top thing since Weird Al did that Amish music video.
5. Rob Van Dam vs. Brock Lesnar (J:4 B:5)
Jessie: Remember when RVD was stiff? I know it may take a memory jog, but it was around the time Bill Clinton got sucked off like a siphone. Well, Lesnar remembered too because he did a decent job of making RVD's kicks look ferocious. His forearms..there's just no hope there. Lesnar is frighteningly strong and the crowd "OOH's" and "AAH's" at his feats. He was a great Vader in this, just completely monstrous but also selling as if RVD was really putting the hurt on him. RVD gets thrown over the top post and completely acts like a woman, protecting himself from a really cool, hurty bump. Heyman loves to scream to remind you to boo him, then you remember he created ECW and you boo him anyways. DQ finish hurts the grade but the aftermatch stuff was pretty standard stuff too.
Brian: This had the feeling of a much bigger match. Jessie did a good job of covering most of its details. I often can't tell if RVD is being lazy or just high. Turn up the volume and listen to this crowd go bananas for the "5-Star Frog Splash." The beer vendor probably had a heart attack, that's if he still had a soul after spending so much time being a trifling piece of sewer shit. Heyman got Brock disqualified, which led to Charles Robinson throwing some of the worst fake punches I've ever seen, faker than Rena Mero's (or is it Lesnar now?) fun bags.
6. Big Show vs. Booker T - No DQ, No Countout (J:4 B:4)
Brian: Both of these guys were a lot thinner then, especially Big Show, who looked relatively fit compared to his latest stint in ECW, where he looked bereft of guilt and like a giant pile of sweltering dung. No, Smash TV isn't just the name of a shitty video game, now it has a new definition, as Booker smashed a monitor on Show's despicable face. Booker T did a scissorkick on Show that drove them both through a table, in a spot that looks even weirder in reality than it does typed in print. I really dug Booker busting out the "Houston Hangover" for the finish, as I always got my jollies watching him try that one. Outside of kudos for that one move, the rest of this was atypical tame hardcore stuff, like mediocre usage of weapons, etc.
Jessie: Booker certainly is a King, King of the Awesomely Entertaining Because That's What We Do: We Entertain, We Don't take Muscle Enhancing Drugs, We Put Smiles on People's Faces…well, I digress, But, his facial expressions are the Bomb. Big Show is really not giving anything to Booker, the guy's work ethic is absolutely horrible. In theory, that scissors kick was probably a good idea in the backstage area, but it played out like a choreograped scene in a USA original Van Damme film. That Hangover has to be one of the most accurate he's ever pulled off, and i agree it was the sole bright spot in this slow, tepid brawl. Smash TV was an awful game, regardless of the half naked chicks in it. This whole show was all about one experienced guy who gave a shit leading someone who either didn't know what they were doing or were too concerned with what snack they were going to eat froma vending machine then defecate onto Dawn Marie's flabby stomach.
7. Anti-Americans vs. Edge and Hulk Hogan (J:4 B:4)
Jessie: J to the Yizzo! R to the Ezzo! I love watching his younger WWE-work because he used to take so many killer bumps for no reason. Right out of the gate, he spills to the outside from a Hogan shove like a guy that ran off the top of a 3 story parking garage. Hogan has a good, simple offensive set and his punches are very No Holds Barred-ish, well, shit, that reference doesn't work very well. Hogan on defense is as shoddy as New Orleans Disaster precautions. Storm bumps everywhere all over the place, but his face is completely blank as if nothing hurts him. Edge works the last half of the match really stiff, but the first half was really weak. The match is fine, except for the overbooked Jarrett finish where Test, Rikishi (wearing a shirt with his large ass on the back) and Jericho interfere.
Brian: This was a big, bolstering piece of work to further diminish Hogan's appeal in the eyes of most. Storm looked more robotic than Rosie the Robot Maid from The Jetsons, with none of the latent sexuality. Christian still hadn't found his niche, and Edge was in the shadow of Hogan, whose inability to move at a normal speed makes him look really sad somehow. This was void of hurty bumps or solid storytelling.
8. Undertaker vs. The Rock vs. Kurt Angle (J:6 B:5)
Brian: I think Jessie will likely handle more of the details of this match, as I walk away from viewing it with little to say outside a small rant. This definitely brought me back to an era of WWE I despise, specifically WWE main events, and the lack of substance therein. 85% of this match was composed of guys punching. The punches weren't even that damned good! And, even if they had been, fit them into the context of the story you're attempting to tell, don't make them the key ingredient. But no, we've got Rock's theatrical swipes, Angle snapping off his rights like he's putting on a slap bracelet, but alas, we get no leopard print arm décor here, just unbelievable fighting by three grown men who should know better. Don't even get me started on everyone kicking out of everyone else's finishers, and then doing the other guys' finishers, repeat ad nausea, etc. I demand more out of my main events.
Jessie: This match was constantly moving with a lot of high impact stuff the whole way through. But, as Brian said, all three of these guys were so theatrical in their sells. That's usual for Rock, but Angle and even Taker were so animated; everytime they got hit they flopped like Gumby in a windstorm. They used the "we'll use the other guy's finisher on him!" sequence and did it pretty early. They should know by now that only marks like those spots and true fans know it's more a lack of having nothing else to do in a match. Angle bled a little, nothing too severe and since he didn't win, it didn't really up the drama quotient. The crowd was going bananas and loving every single spot. They got serious towards the end and Angle's submissions spots were really well timed and well executed, except for when Taker obviously slid his head from in between Angle's triangle. The finish kept building and building and finally just ended abruptly with Rock going over. The incessant punching was tiresome and the whole goofy selling really bogged down my enjoyment of this. I think the level of quality of guys in this match also hampered the score overall because they are capable of much better storytelling. I think overall i liked this more than Brian as I enjoyed the energy of the participants and the crowd a lot, just drop the Vaudeville comedy act and get down to bizniz!
Jessie: So this is what we have: Eddie at his greasiest, Benoit at his most roided out, Bubba, not being obese, and Spike, just there (like the rest of his career) It's so weird to see these two on a team and know five years later they're both dead and one is disgraced. With that said, they are basically dissecting the Dudleys throughout this match. They have great team work and Eddie has legit heel heat from the crowd. This match is basically an extended squash for the first ten minutes or so. Bubba was taking some great corner bumps and was letting the heels pound him well. These scientific guys have a hard time with the tables, with Tazz even calling Guerrero out saying "he's having a hell of a wrestling match with this table" Eddie yelled back at him even. Eddie looks like an inept Church fundraiser organizer, just botching the table setups left and right. All you need to know is all of the table spots are really sloppy. Spike puts himself through a table as Eddie's chin hits like he was falling asleep in study hall. Benoit drops Spike violently through some wood from a press slam, then Benoit goes ass first through a table with a Bubba Bomb, yeah, it looked uglier than it sounds. The Heels were really aggressive, as was Bubba, but there was a lot of dead air in this match, and the technicians definitley struggled with the concept of setting up tables. I have a feeling as a regular match this would be better, but since it must be graded as a tables, they failed badly at the notion.
Brian: I obviously enjoyed this a lot more than Jessie. My only complaint, and the reason it doesn't warrant a higher grade, is the table bumps that the match was based upon weren't that special. But, the bulk of the match was really enjoyable for me, it had energy and pacing that really reminded me of an old ECW Arena match. They gave it some ample time, and the guys didn't seem real concerned about squeezing in excess stuff. I think Jessie nailed it when he said the team of Benoit and Guerrero were "dissecting" their opponents, as they were just ruthless, being real aggressive and dominating. I agree with Jessie on Bubba Ray taking some good bumps throughout, eating a lot of stuff right on his face, and Spike took a bump into the stairs like a trooper. I think the difficulty setting up tables wasn't a real distraction, as I've seen ECW originals like Sabu and Sandman waste way more time. As Jessie noted, once the tables started smashing, things took a turn for the worse. It would have been nice to see Benoit eliminate Spike using one of his more patented moves, as just doing a press slam seemed like a waste of a big spot. Still, my quibbles with it aside, this was arguably the most fun match to watch of the entire show.
2. Jamie Knoble vs. Billy Kidman (J:5 B:5)
Brian: This was good, both guys looked prepared and as if they knew each other well before this. As it progressed, there were some great near falls. Kidman's arm got worked over a bunch, which he sold commendably, including a sick bump into a ringpost. Some of Kidman's strikes were weaker than the daiquiri it'd take nowadays to get Torrie Wilson to let you pee on her spread open buttocks. As it continued, things started seeming less cool because of their smoothness, and actually worse for it, as parts looked more like telegraphing than fighting. The tigerbomb finish was a nice touch.
Jessie: Huh? Right at the beginning, both men tumble out of the ring. Okay, I'll pretend that didn't happen. These guys have some good chemistry and Noble works a neat spot where he uses Nidia as a distraction to try and break Kidman's arm. Kidman's Crash Test Dummy-like spill into the post was pretty swank. Kidman is selling his arm pretty well, acting as if it hurts, but not as bad as Knoble thinks. I'd agree with Brian as the match begins to feel like a training school spot session more than a PPV match as everything they do seems nice and easy, no aggressiveness to it. I think that was always Kidman's biggest flaw: no aggression. They botch a Tornado DDT type move that the announcers even acknowledge, but the ending sequence works well and you had the feeling either guy could have won.
3. Jeff Hardy vs. William Regal (J:2 B:3)
Jessie: Regal was being deliciously evil in this , with some neat knee drop variations and such. Hardy was all over the place, walking around like the drunk guy you are sure is going to walk right through the bonfire at a party. Regal's stuff is supposed to look painful, but Hardy can't sell it the way it needs to be sold; his facials scream "I just hurt myself on a dare to jump a garbage can with a pogo stick" painful, not "my head just absorbed another man's boot!" They botched some really silly stuff outside and Regal looked noticeably pissed. A strange arm drag move and a roll up later and it's over. These styles went together as well as sweaters and chainsaws.
Brian: Jeff Hardy's hair was greener than Doc Samson's. Regal was dishing out some stiff clubbing shots, but later, his "half-nelson back throw" as Tazz called it was insipid. Regal blocked Hardy's "Swanton Bomb" by putting up his knees, subsequently, Hardy sold it like a kid disdained by opening up his fridge to no Mountain Dew Code Red left in it. Hardy got the quick victory with a roll-up, keeping some of Regal's heat, but still turning in a stinker. This was designed to be a throwaway match, but that doesn't mean it couldn't have been good.
4. John Cena vs. Chris Jericho (J:5 B:4)
Brian: This was pre-hip-hop Cena and his 1st PPV match. Cena was still green here, and instead of being a ring general, Jericho seemed bored and lackadaisical. But fuck, we didn't want laissez-faire we wanted some action! Jericho was in the corner when he blocked a Cena splash by hitting a superb dropkick off the 2nd turnbuckle. John Cena sold a bulldog like Daniel Stern in Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. Cena countered a cocky submission with a quick roll-up to score the upset victory. I'd like to see these guys work together again, but you can avoid this like would an ROH fan in public.
Jessie : I give this an extra point for the crazy dropkick Jericho pulled off that exploded Cena's stomach like an atom bomb! A really cool spot. Cena was really green in his Ohio State colored trunks (yet they were in Michigan and he was the face?) and a lot of what he did was telegraphed big time. Jericho took his time to get the crowd behind the near falls but he pulled it out in the end with a good upset finish. Jericho brought nothing top shelf, hell even really middle shelf and pretty much used his most basic tools to help guide Cena through this one. His sleeper drop looked like someone slipping while ice skating and grabbing the person next to them for support. Yeah, Cena's faces are the most over the top thing since Weird Al did that Amish music video.
5. Rob Van Dam vs. Brock Lesnar (J:4 B:5)
Jessie: Remember when RVD was stiff? I know it may take a memory jog, but it was around the time Bill Clinton got sucked off like a siphone. Well, Lesnar remembered too because he did a decent job of making RVD's kicks look ferocious. His forearms..there's just no hope there. Lesnar is frighteningly strong and the crowd "OOH's" and "AAH's" at his feats. He was a great Vader in this, just completely monstrous but also selling as if RVD was really putting the hurt on him. RVD gets thrown over the top post and completely acts like a woman, protecting himself from a really cool, hurty bump. Heyman loves to scream to remind you to boo him, then you remember he created ECW and you boo him anyways. DQ finish hurts the grade but the aftermatch stuff was pretty standard stuff too.
Brian: This had the feeling of a much bigger match. Jessie did a good job of covering most of its details. I often can't tell if RVD is being lazy or just high. Turn up the volume and listen to this crowd go bananas for the "5-Star Frog Splash." The beer vendor probably had a heart attack, that's if he still had a soul after spending so much time being a trifling piece of sewer shit. Heyman got Brock disqualified, which led to Charles Robinson throwing some of the worst fake punches I've ever seen, faker than Rena Mero's (or is it Lesnar now?) fun bags.
6. Big Show vs. Booker T - No DQ, No Countout (J:4 B:4)
Brian: Both of these guys were a lot thinner then, especially Big Show, who looked relatively fit compared to his latest stint in ECW, where he looked bereft of guilt and like a giant pile of sweltering dung. No, Smash TV isn't just the name of a shitty video game, now it has a new definition, as Booker smashed a monitor on Show's despicable face. Booker T did a scissorkick on Show that drove them both through a table, in a spot that looks even weirder in reality than it does typed in print. I really dug Booker busting out the "Houston Hangover" for the finish, as I always got my jollies watching him try that one. Outside of kudos for that one move, the rest of this was atypical tame hardcore stuff, like mediocre usage of weapons, etc.
Jessie: Booker certainly is a King, King of the Awesomely Entertaining Because That's What We Do: We Entertain, We Don't take Muscle Enhancing Drugs, We Put Smiles on People's Faces…well, I digress, But, his facial expressions are the Bomb. Big Show is really not giving anything to Booker, the guy's work ethic is absolutely horrible. In theory, that scissors kick was probably a good idea in the backstage area, but it played out like a choreograped scene in a USA original Van Damme film. That Hangover has to be one of the most accurate he's ever pulled off, and i agree it was the sole bright spot in this slow, tepid brawl. Smash TV was an awful game, regardless of the half naked chicks in it. This whole show was all about one experienced guy who gave a shit leading someone who either didn't know what they were doing or were too concerned with what snack they were going to eat froma vending machine then defecate onto Dawn Marie's flabby stomach.
7. Anti-Americans vs. Edge and Hulk Hogan (J:4 B:4)
Jessie: J to the Yizzo! R to the Ezzo! I love watching his younger WWE-work because he used to take so many killer bumps for no reason. Right out of the gate, he spills to the outside from a Hogan shove like a guy that ran off the top of a 3 story parking garage. Hogan has a good, simple offensive set and his punches are very No Holds Barred-ish, well, shit, that reference doesn't work very well. Hogan on defense is as shoddy as New Orleans Disaster precautions. Storm bumps everywhere all over the place, but his face is completely blank as if nothing hurts him. Edge works the last half of the match really stiff, but the first half was really weak. The match is fine, except for the overbooked Jarrett finish where Test, Rikishi (wearing a shirt with his large ass on the back) and Jericho interfere.
Brian: This was a big, bolstering piece of work to further diminish Hogan's appeal in the eyes of most. Storm looked more robotic than Rosie the Robot Maid from The Jetsons, with none of the latent sexuality. Christian still hadn't found his niche, and Edge was in the shadow of Hogan, whose inability to move at a normal speed makes him look really sad somehow. This was void of hurty bumps or solid storytelling.
8. Undertaker vs. The Rock vs. Kurt Angle (J:6 B:5)
Brian: I think Jessie will likely handle more of the details of this match, as I walk away from viewing it with little to say outside a small rant. This definitely brought me back to an era of WWE I despise, specifically WWE main events, and the lack of substance therein. 85% of this match was composed of guys punching. The punches weren't even that damned good! And, even if they had been, fit them into the context of the story you're attempting to tell, don't make them the key ingredient. But no, we've got Rock's theatrical swipes, Angle snapping off his rights like he's putting on a slap bracelet, but alas, we get no leopard print arm décor here, just unbelievable fighting by three grown men who should know better. Don't even get me started on everyone kicking out of everyone else's finishers, and then doing the other guys' finishers, repeat ad nausea, etc. I demand more out of my main events.
Jessie: This match was constantly moving with a lot of high impact stuff the whole way through. But, as Brian said, all three of these guys were so theatrical in their sells. That's usual for Rock, but Angle and even Taker were so animated; everytime they got hit they flopped like Gumby in a windstorm. They used the "we'll use the other guy's finisher on him!" sequence and did it pretty early. They should know by now that only marks like those spots and true fans know it's more a lack of having nothing else to do in a match. Angle bled a little, nothing too severe and since he didn't win, it didn't really up the drama quotient. The crowd was going bananas and loving every single spot. They got serious towards the end and Angle's submissions spots were really well timed and well executed, except for when Taker obviously slid his head from in between Angle's triangle. The finish kept building and building and finally just ended abruptly with Rock going over. The incessant punching was tiresome and the whole goofy selling really bogged down my enjoyment of this. I think the level of quality of guys in this match also hampered the score overall because they are capable of much better storytelling. I think overall i liked this more than Brian as I enjoyed the energy of the participants and the crowd a lot, just drop the Vaudeville comedy act and get down to bizniz!
Friday, November 9, 2007
ROH: Glory by Honor VI - Night 1
This is a review of a live show; now keep in mind, most shows, especiall ROH play differently live than they do on home video or digital disc, so these scores and opinions could vary from a viewing of this show at home. Let's get into it!
Dark Matches:
1) Sugarfoot Alex Payne v. ?- 2
This was indy shlock at it's finest. Payne was a scrawny cocky kid that looked fresh from a Junior High school swirlie. The only thing of note was a spinning back fist that would make Shonie Carter envious.
2) Shane Hagadorn v. "Rhettski the Jettski"- 3
Hagadorn is bald, but he ain't stiff! Rhett looked like someone who just stepped off of a Wave Rider game in a local arcade and decided to transform his life into that person. They did some fun armdrags and basic stuff and actually had a fe near falls, but it only lasted probably 6 minutes or so. Rhett's character stands out among ROH's stable of bad asses and wannabe's.
The Card:
3) Kevin Steen/ El Generico v. Hangmen's 3 (Brent Albright/ BJ Whitmer) - 5
Steen was really over and BJ was really broken out with acne. The crowd ate up Steen although he rarely got in the ring with Albright, who are both big bruisers. Generico and the heels built up a great first few minutes of the contest. This was an exciting tag match that had a ton of near falls and built pretty well toward an ending. There was some miscommunication when everyone was in there and a lackluster finish stopped this one dead in it's tracks on it's way to an above average score.
4) Claudio Castanogli v. Hallowicked- 3
Claudio has a really out there look and he's got a very peculiar build but it all works for him. He took the masked goofball through some good matwork and sequences throughout the first few minutes, but after that, the match kind of fell flat and finished early. Hallowicked didn't have any power or stank on anything he was throwing and Claudio's uppercuts could use some polish.
5) Davey Richards v. Delirious- 5
I'm a fan of Richards, even though he isn't the most botch proof guy in the fed. Delirious can be good but his offense against these stacked powerhouses looks so forced. They had some really good counters for each other's offense but the pointless ringside area brawl was as meandering as a path in the forest. I loved the clean submission finish and the key lock Richards used looked like it could break adamantium.
6) Briscoe Brothers v. Rocky Romero/ Roderick Strong- 6
I don't get the challenger tag team at all; you got vanilla skinned Roderick who looks like he only shops at American Eagle, then you got Romero, who looks like he was an extra in a really bad Jet Li movie. But, they were both in shape. This match was pretty exciting, as both teams exhibited some deadly double team moves. I wish the Briscoes would stick with some patented double team moves; seems as if they have something different every match, which I give them points for being innovative. NRC's knees in the corner spot was as brutal as anything I've seen lately, with the exception of Stallone's "Driven." Jay's karate man chops are entertaining, but have no effect on anyone. This match also didn't drag out like a lot of Briscoe matches, but I don't think they have the chemistry with this team that would have helped garner this a higher grade.
7) The Age of the Fall v. The Vulture Squad- 3
This was really fun while it lasted while at the same time being completely devoid of any psychology at all. It was just a good old fashioned spot fest. The Age's ring music is bloodcurdling and awesomely original. I actually thought there was a women being raped, probably the only one in the crowd or backstage who wasn't willing (if you saw some of the fans I did, you know what I mean) The Age had some fantastically innovative double teams that were just wowing me and Ruckus was just flying all over the ring as if on a Hollywood stunt wire. Evans was grounded mostly and Black and Jigsaw were largely invisible. And then there is Necro Butcher; This guy is an act not to be missed! His punches are freakin' hilarious because they are pretty real looking but slower than Harley Race on Perkisets. He was pretty stiff and fun to watch. As far as the late 2000-ECW spot fest of planchas that took place afterwards, me and my buddies shit all over it. What a bunch of shit that we've seen so many times before and just gets old; it was as worn out as Sara Del Ray's jaws after sucking off Gabe Sapolsky's little chubby.
8) Mitch Franklin v. Ernie Osiris- 1
I know I saw this on the card but did it even happen? There was exactly no spots, little selling and it went about 4 minutes long with a title change for a sports store trophy. What a waste.
9) Austin Aries v. Bryan Danielson- 7
Danielson came out of the curtain to a true star's welcome. He is my pick for Wrestler of the Year and he and Aries,who can be hot or cold, had a tremendous match. Danielson is one of the best wrestler's to counter another's top moves and it's so fun to watch. Aries long hair doesn't really work for him, but Danielson's facial expressions work wonders for him. He was in Terminator mode in this one. A great last few minutes, including the 2 finishers Aries hit to get the upset. The only thing that holds this back is the length, going barely 15 minutes. It could have had that Match of the Year feeling if it was given more stock.
10) Nigel McGuiness v. Chris Hero- 1
This match can deep throat my balls. Hero is a shitty backyarder with vinyl trunks. His little flabby gut and zombie-white skin couldn't possibly make any woman horny, maybe the mindless, grease filled, fat ass, chicken dinner, pudgy, blowhole that sat behind us and yelled loud, stupid, insignificant chants all night (Ex. 30 seconds into the Main Event, he yells "Match of the Year") but that guy would be it. Hero has no psych because he didn't even go after Nigel's arm, just kicked him for 7 minutes on the ground. Nigel had to feel like shit; he's the new champion and he basically got shit all over for the 108th guy to use his initials with the Superman logo on them. Very original. The Dusty finish with Hero winning had me regretting the almost 10 hour drive it took us to get to Philly but made the CZW fan boys around us soak their panties with delight. All we wanted was to see Misawa, not this WWE-lite bullshit.
11) Noamichi Marufuji/ Takeshi Morishima v. KENTA/ Mitsuharu Misawa- 8
This was why we drove through three states, to see the Green and White wearing Warrior do battle on American soil. Misawa was a man we had watched for 10-15 years on videotapes from all the usual suspects of tape pirates on the net and now we had the chance to see him. He was definitley not in his prime, but he was right in front of us and it was awesome. We actually were searching for a while for a hotel and quickly pulled into an ugly little shitbox called the Summit. Why? It was painted (years ago) in peeling white and green décor. It was a sure tell sign it was meant for us. I digress….
Speaking about the match, it was mostly all about KENTA v. Marufuji, and they were absolutely on fire, like it was NBA Jam in '93! They were the stars of the match and I see this rivalry being the Misawa v. Kawada feud that ruled All Japan for so many years. Morishima was pretty Beastly in this as well, absolutely crushing KENTA in a reversal of a German where he basically sat down on the young man's stomach. It was devastating. Misawa worked very snug and took some of Morishima's best shots. He didn't look very spry but he was definitley up to the task. The Draw gimmick worked in some ways and didn't work in others, as being very telegraphed. The fans chanted "Bullshit" after a legend in Japan flew some 18-20 hours to come to America and fight in front of 1500 fans when he's used to 40,000. Yeah, I guess that was bullshit of him. Anyways, I thoroughly enjoyed the match and thought it was really stiff in a fun way and lived up to the hype. If you're looking for us on the home video release, Brian, myself, and Didge (in that order) sat right on the aisleway and slapped the backs of all the hard workers that night. Long live Misawa.
Dark Matches:
1) Sugarfoot Alex Payne v. ?- 2
This was indy shlock at it's finest. Payne was a scrawny cocky kid that looked fresh from a Junior High school swirlie. The only thing of note was a spinning back fist that would make Shonie Carter envious.
2) Shane Hagadorn v. "Rhettski the Jettski"- 3
Hagadorn is bald, but he ain't stiff! Rhett looked like someone who just stepped off of a Wave Rider game in a local arcade and decided to transform his life into that person. They did some fun armdrags and basic stuff and actually had a fe near falls, but it only lasted probably 6 minutes or so. Rhett's character stands out among ROH's stable of bad asses and wannabe's.
The Card:
3) Kevin Steen/ El Generico v. Hangmen's 3 (Brent Albright/ BJ Whitmer) - 5
Steen was really over and BJ was really broken out with acne. The crowd ate up Steen although he rarely got in the ring with Albright, who are both big bruisers. Generico and the heels built up a great first few minutes of the contest. This was an exciting tag match that had a ton of near falls and built pretty well toward an ending. There was some miscommunication when everyone was in there and a lackluster finish stopped this one dead in it's tracks on it's way to an above average score.
4) Claudio Castanogli v. Hallowicked- 3
Claudio has a really out there look and he's got a very peculiar build but it all works for him. He took the masked goofball through some good matwork and sequences throughout the first few minutes, but after that, the match kind of fell flat and finished early. Hallowicked didn't have any power or stank on anything he was throwing and Claudio's uppercuts could use some polish.
5) Davey Richards v. Delirious- 5
I'm a fan of Richards, even though he isn't the most botch proof guy in the fed. Delirious can be good but his offense against these stacked powerhouses looks so forced. They had some really good counters for each other's offense but the pointless ringside area brawl was as meandering as a path in the forest. I loved the clean submission finish and the key lock Richards used looked like it could break adamantium.
6) Briscoe Brothers v. Rocky Romero/ Roderick Strong- 6
I don't get the challenger tag team at all; you got vanilla skinned Roderick who looks like he only shops at American Eagle, then you got Romero, who looks like he was an extra in a really bad Jet Li movie. But, they were both in shape. This match was pretty exciting, as both teams exhibited some deadly double team moves. I wish the Briscoes would stick with some patented double team moves; seems as if they have something different every match, which I give them points for being innovative. NRC's knees in the corner spot was as brutal as anything I've seen lately, with the exception of Stallone's "Driven." Jay's karate man chops are entertaining, but have no effect on anyone. This match also didn't drag out like a lot of Briscoe matches, but I don't think they have the chemistry with this team that would have helped garner this a higher grade.
7) The Age of the Fall v. The Vulture Squad- 3
This was really fun while it lasted while at the same time being completely devoid of any psychology at all. It was just a good old fashioned spot fest. The Age's ring music is bloodcurdling and awesomely original. I actually thought there was a women being raped, probably the only one in the crowd or backstage who wasn't willing (if you saw some of the fans I did, you know what I mean) The Age had some fantastically innovative double teams that were just wowing me and Ruckus was just flying all over the ring as if on a Hollywood stunt wire. Evans was grounded mostly and Black and Jigsaw were largely invisible. And then there is Necro Butcher; This guy is an act not to be missed! His punches are freakin' hilarious because they are pretty real looking but slower than Harley Race on Perkisets. He was pretty stiff and fun to watch. As far as the late 2000-ECW spot fest of planchas that took place afterwards, me and my buddies shit all over it. What a bunch of shit that we've seen so many times before and just gets old; it was as worn out as Sara Del Ray's jaws after sucking off Gabe Sapolsky's little chubby.
8) Mitch Franklin v. Ernie Osiris- 1
I know I saw this on the card but did it even happen? There was exactly no spots, little selling and it went about 4 minutes long with a title change for a sports store trophy. What a waste.
9) Austin Aries v. Bryan Danielson- 7
Danielson came out of the curtain to a true star's welcome. He is my pick for Wrestler of the Year and he and Aries,who can be hot or cold, had a tremendous match. Danielson is one of the best wrestler's to counter another's top moves and it's so fun to watch. Aries long hair doesn't really work for him, but Danielson's facial expressions work wonders for him. He was in Terminator mode in this one. A great last few minutes, including the 2 finishers Aries hit to get the upset. The only thing that holds this back is the length, going barely 15 minutes. It could have had that Match of the Year feeling if it was given more stock.
10) Nigel McGuiness v. Chris Hero- 1
This match can deep throat my balls. Hero is a shitty backyarder with vinyl trunks. His little flabby gut and zombie-white skin couldn't possibly make any woman horny, maybe the mindless, grease filled, fat ass, chicken dinner, pudgy, blowhole that sat behind us and yelled loud, stupid, insignificant chants all night (Ex. 30 seconds into the Main Event, he yells "Match of the Year") but that guy would be it. Hero has no psych because he didn't even go after Nigel's arm, just kicked him for 7 minutes on the ground. Nigel had to feel like shit; he's the new champion and he basically got shit all over for the 108th guy to use his initials with the Superman logo on them. Very original. The Dusty finish with Hero winning had me regretting the almost 10 hour drive it took us to get to Philly but made the CZW fan boys around us soak their panties with delight. All we wanted was to see Misawa, not this WWE-lite bullshit.
11) Noamichi Marufuji/ Takeshi Morishima v. KENTA/ Mitsuharu Misawa- 8
This was why we drove through three states, to see the Green and White wearing Warrior do battle on American soil. Misawa was a man we had watched for 10-15 years on videotapes from all the usual suspects of tape pirates on the net and now we had the chance to see him. He was definitley not in his prime, but he was right in front of us and it was awesome. We actually were searching for a while for a hotel and quickly pulled into an ugly little shitbox called the Summit. Why? It was painted (years ago) in peeling white and green décor. It was a sure tell sign it was meant for us. I digress….
Speaking about the match, it was mostly all about KENTA v. Marufuji, and they were absolutely on fire, like it was NBA Jam in '93! They were the stars of the match and I see this rivalry being the Misawa v. Kawada feud that ruled All Japan for so many years. Morishima was pretty Beastly in this as well, absolutely crushing KENTA in a reversal of a German where he basically sat down on the young man's stomach. It was devastating. Misawa worked very snug and took some of Morishima's best shots. He didn't look very spry but he was definitley up to the task. The Draw gimmick worked in some ways and didn't work in others, as being very telegraphed. The fans chanted "Bullshit" after a legend in Japan flew some 18-20 hours to come to America and fight in front of 1500 fans when he's used to 40,000. Yeah, I guess that was bullshit of him. Anyways, I thoroughly enjoyed the match and thought it was really stiff in a fun way and lived up to the hype. If you're looking for us on the home video release, Brian, myself, and Didge (in that order) sat right on the aisleway and slapped the backs of all the hard workers that night. Long live Misawa.
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
WCW Wrestle War '90: Wild Thing Co-Review
Brian: During the show's opening there's a ridiculously bad "rap" song. Jim Ross and Terry Funk are our commentary team. This should be fun.
1. Kevin Sullivan and Buzz Sawyer vs. Dynamic Dudes (J:4 B:4)
Jessie: At first glance, you may think you've seen Buzz down at your local trailer park, but no, he's dead as a dodo. anyways, Sawyer is the magnet of this match; his mannerisms are so strange you keep your eyes on him, even though Sullivan is sporting a long green ponytail made of neon shoestrings, when they were still popular. The heels have no real teamwork per se but Ace throws a mean dropkick. The pace is all off in this thing because you have two different styles here and neither are bending to help the other team out. The heels are pretty bland in their facial expressions and there are really no big spots to speak of. Sawyer's limp splash is the finish, which kind of comes out of nowhere. not very good.
Brian: Buzz was definitely uglier than I recalled. I dig how Sawyer wrenches his headlock, and later, he takes a tasty spill to the floor between the ropes after a dropkick. Ace does a plancha that I was feeling. Buzz suplexes Douglas on the floor, and later, delivers a wicked belly-to-belly suplex. Ace attempted a headscissors on Sawyer but botched it. The finish saw Sawyer get the win after a big splash off the top. Story is the old rugged dicks versus young hopefuls. The heels were mean and stiff, and the Dudes could have potentially been a decent team, as they ate stuff well and were sympathetic, but it was never to be.
2. Cactus Jack Manson vs. Norman the Lunatic (J:5 B:4)
Brian: Norman's sporting one wrestling boot, one dirty Reebok. Cactus takes his first patented floor bump randomly off of a pinfall kickout by Norman. On the floor, Jack no sells his head being smashed into the apron. Then, Cactus gets backdropped over the guardrail and onto the concrete floor. Guess he let that night's prostitute do all the work. Cactus does a reckless dropkick off the apron that the cameras hardly capture. Back in the ring, Norman's corner splash looks better than Sting's ever did. Terry Funk drops a Farhat reference. The end comes when Jack's piledriver is reversed, he attempts a sunset flip, but Norman blocked it and sat on Manson's face for the finish. Norman is way better than Eugene who reminds me of a contemporary version. I guess those years in Stampede did the trick, it's just too bad he never got to work a program with Triple H and we had to sit through Eugene's. Norman was very audible when selling which I thought was terrific. The story was that they were both crazies.
Jesse: Compared to the opener, this match succeeded. Jack took numerous sick bumps, but all reasonably within the realm of the story. i was thinking watching it that how many guys during that time killed themselves to get over Norman the Lunatic? Probably as many that saw "Grindhouse" in the theaters. Norman was pretty expressive in his sells and was really good paired with Cactus because he has a lot of dirty tricks to use. The finish made absolute sense and Kudos to Foley for selling it. That hooker had her work cut out for her that night, Brian.
3. Rock 'N' Roll Express vs. Midnight Express (J:5 B:5)
Jessie: While I enjoyed this match, it was not without it's share of problems. The Midnights being embarrassed section was pretty lengthy and knowing these two teams had fought so many times before, it felt like a rehash of stuff and spots used over and over again. That being said, these two teams worked like oil in an engine together, just knowing each other's spots, great timing, and the heels were bumping great. All 4 had solid strikes and the Midnights had wonderful double teaming stuff. The hot tag to Gibson worked better than Cornette's viagra and the false finish with the tennis racket was pretty unexpected. The finish was a botched hot shot that the R & R's reversed and it came off looking pretty bad. I know these guys have better matches in them together, and for the record, i've always enjoyed the Midnights and the Fantastics matches better.
Brian: I agree that this wasn’t one of these teams’ better matches pared off against each other. Jim Cornette and the referee paired off early on, which was one of many cheap heat antics used to get this crowd molten. Eaton and Morton both go over the top to the floor, then Stan Lane slammed Morton on the ground, which guaranteed at least one extra pain killer later that night. Midnight Express sold stuff largely well, like Lane after a fistdrop. Long build to a Gibson hot tag, which lead shortly to the finish, as he rolled up Lane as Morton tackled Eaton. This was satisfactory but not something you need to see.
4. Road Warriors vs. Skyscrapers - Chicago Street Fight (J:3 B:3)
Brian: I've been to Chicago three times and never saw anything like this. Masked Skyscraper (a last-minute replacement for injured Dan Spivey) eats a big boot from Hawk. Later, Hawk does a clothesline from the apron outside onto Mark Callous (Undertaker). Ron Simmons and Butch Reed (later known as Doom) show up at ringside in tuxedos. Both of the Road Warriors' clotheslines and dropkicks looked tremendous. Callous is thrown outside and decides to just walk away. The Warriors hit the "Doomsday Device" on Masked Skyscraper for the relatively quick victory. Afterwards, Theodore R. Long gets in the ring and the Warriors chuck him out over the top rope at Reed and Simmons like a Nerf ball. This leads to a big, wild brawl that featured little cooperation. There's a great visual of Hawk ripping open Butch Reed's tuxedo top and doing a number on his chest in the corner. This was fun, but about as substantial as a meal from McDonald's.
Jessie: This was a short brawl that the Warriors pretty much dominated. Feel bad for the Masked Skyscraper, whatever big, juiced out dude was hanging around the back, eating a chili burger, hoping to get squashed by Ranger Ross, then he gets thrown to the lions. Yeah, the Dropkicks were spot on and the clothesline on Taker outside was a highlight. Doom was looking awfully spiffy in their white tuxes and that brawl was just all kinds of unprofessional. Simmons was hit with his own foreign object, but it had as much effect on him as a paperwad.
5. Tom Zenk and Brian Pillman vs. Fabulous Freedbirds (J:5 B:5)
Jessie: This seemed to run pretty long. Hayes on offense is pretty limited, even though he can dance well and shake his cottage cheese hips. Garvin's hair was as preposterous as OJ's "If I did It" book. Pillman and Zenk were all over their much older counterparts as far as offense and the energy they put out carried much of the match's momentum. All the girlies in the crowd were practically already pregnant by these two. But, the match dragged out way too long and with Zenk on defense, it felt eternally agonizing. His selling was really awful, as he either adjusted his trunks or wiped the sweat from his eyes, as if he was working hard laying on his ass in a rear chinlock. I'm not sure why this match was decided to go this long but it suffered from it and during the finish, all 4 guys were confused and stumbling around like they were trapped in that stupid house from Saw 2. Moderately recommendable.
Brian: I don’t have many notes on this one, because as Jessie noted, it wasn’t the easiest thing to watch. I don’t mind matches that run long, as long as it fits the context and helps propel the story to that next level, but this just sagged during the second half like any of Jerry Lawler’s failed marriages. I do recall Pillman getting caught with a deliciously stiff Michael Hayes straight left punch in the corner. A flying crossbody by Pillman on Garvin lead to the end, putting this thing away quicker than this weekend’s local indy worker puts away Pillman’s kids now so he can spend six minutes sweating on top of Pillman’s old lady.
6. Stiener Bros. vs. Ole and Arn Anderson (J:5 B:6)
Brian: The crowd is hot early for the Stieners. Scott Stiener botches an atomic drop, forgetting to leave a knee out, leaving nothing there for Arn to drop on. Ole cranks his headlocks like the cagey vet he is. Scott does a wild suplex on Ole where he holds him in mid-air, kind of cradling him, and then just tosses him over his head. Arn eats a back elbow by Scott and falls out to the floor. Arn ignores Scott's attempt at ramming him into the stairs, then dodges a Stiener clothesline, leading to Scott's arm drilling the ringpost in an ugly spot. The Andersons both do a lot of work on the arm. Scott executes a breathtaking Frankenstiener. The Andersons whip Rick into the ropes, duck to presumably bodydrop him, but he puts on the breaks, kicks Arn, then does a quick roll-up on Ole for the surprise victory. While this is neither team's top shelf stuff, it's largely inoffensive, and especially recommendable for fans of the Steiners.
Jessie: Brian pretty much covered the majority of the big spots in this match. The Steiners were apparently pretty hyped up to whip on the old boys because they hurt Sting. Arn was pretty entertaining in this, outsmarting Scott and giving himself to be destroyed by Rick in an early spot. I loved one part where Rick punched Ole, but he dropped down hooking his legs onto Rick's ankles then kind of basked in what he had done as Rick desperately reached out for the tag, but coming up short. They had been building towards a finish, but it still came pretty suddenly. Arn was just young enough to bump well and hard for the Steiners and Ole was just old enough for me to wonder why he was still wrestling. overall, decent stuff.
7. Lex Luger vs. Ric Flair (J:5 B:6)
Jessie: As good as Flair is, I still say Luger had his prime in a series against Pillman. This match was long, longer than a story from your grandmother and had it's moments. The announcers even admitted it was booked on the fly due to Sting's injury, and you could tell because Flair transformed into Larry Zybyzsko by stalling for large amounts of time here. He did a lot of work with an armbar and Luger did some chinlock that was as boring as a Sunday church service when you're 5 years old. A really lame countout finish while Luger badly brawled with the Andersons left a real sour taste in my mouth and i was not pleased with this look into the past. On the positive side, Flair showed some really good psych by letting Luger build to his power spots, and i thought the crowd seemed pretty into it. But, overall this didn't jump out and grab your attention, nor did it really use that slow burn effect to make you unknowingly really get into this match despite it's long ring time. I enjoyed their Bash 88 match much more as they both showed more passion rather than a lackadasical attitude, even though their was another lame finish to that one.
Brian: Speaking of old ladies telling stories, did anyone ever find that shit hackneyed in Edward Scissorhands? I think I dug this more than Jessie, but very much akin to the earlier Rock ‘N’ Roll versus Midnight Express match, this wasn’t their best stuff by far. Luger’s neon green trunks were stunning. Flair picked apart Lex like a surgeon; funny story, Flair was once called Dr. Giggles in Greensboro after he dropped acid with a chesty waitress and seduced her in a trashy motel. She found out that night “Space Mountain” was in reality much more like “It’s A Small World After All.” Lex sells a back suplex like he woke up from a nightmare. There was some kind of botch on a powerslam where Luger fell on his ass like a chubby girl at a skating rink. A Luger powerslam led to the pin, but Woman reached in and slapped Lex like she did Benoit as he was choking the life out of her. Story is Lex had the title won, but abandoned it to fight in the aisle with the Andersons in an attempt to save Sting. The crowd helped make this match a little more memorable.
1. Kevin Sullivan and Buzz Sawyer vs. Dynamic Dudes (J:4 B:4)
Jessie: At first glance, you may think you've seen Buzz down at your local trailer park, but no, he's dead as a dodo. anyways, Sawyer is the magnet of this match; his mannerisms are so strange you keep your eyes on him, even though Sullivan is sporting a long green ponytail made of neon shoestrings, when they were still popular. The heels have no real teamwork per se but Ace throws a mean dropkick. The pace is all off in this thing because you have two different styles here and neither are bending to help the other team out. The heels are pretty bland in their facial expressions and there are really no big spots to speak of. Sawyer's limp splash is the finish, which kind of comes out of nowhere. not very good.
Brian: Buzz was definitely uglier than I recalled. I dig how Sawyer wrenches his headlock, and later, he takes a tasty spill to the floor between the ropes after a dropkick. Ace does a plancha that I was feeling. Buzz suplexes Douglas on the floor, and later, delivers a wicked belly-to-belly suplex. Ace attempted a headscissors on Sawyer but botched it. The finish saw Sawyer get the win after a big splash off the top. Story is the old rugged dicks versus young hopefuls. The heels were mean and stiff, and the Dudes could have potentially been a decent team, as they ate stuff well and were sympathetic, but it was never to be.
2. Cactus Jack Manson vs. Norman the Lunatic (J:5 B:4)
Brian: Norman's sporting one wrestling boot, one dirty Reebok. Cactus takes his first patented floor bump randomly off of a pinfall kickout by Norman. On the floor, Jack no sells his head being smashed into the apron. Then, Cactus gets backdropped over the guardrail and onto the concrete floor. Guess he let that night's prostitute do all the work. Cactus does a reckless dropkick off the apron that the cameras hardly capture. Back in the ring, Norman's corner splash looks better than Sting's ever did. Terry Funk drops a Farhat reference. The end comes when Jack's piledriver is reversed, he attempts a sunset flip, but Norman blocked it and sat on Manson's face for the finish. Norman is way better than Eugene who reminds me of a contemporary version. I guess those years in Stampede did the trick, it's just too bad he never got to work a program with Triple H and we had to sit through Eugene's. Norman was very audible when selling which I thought was terrific. The story was that they were both crazies.
Jesse: Compared to the opener, this match succeeded. Jack took numerous sick bumps, but all reasonably within the realm of the story. i was thinking watching it that how many guys during that time killed themselves to get over Norman the Lunatic? Probably as many that saw "Grindhouse" in the theaters. Norman was pretty expressive in his sells and was really good paired with Cactus because he has a lot of dirty tricks to use. The finish made absolute sense and Kudos to Foley for selling it. That hooker had her work cut out for her that night, Brian.
3. Rock 'N' Roll Express vs. Midnight Express (J:5 B:5)
Jessie: While I enjoyed this match, it was not without it's share of problems. The Midnights being embarrassed section was pretty lengthy and knowing these two teams had fought so many times before, it felt like a rehash of stuff and spots used over and over again. That being said, these two teams worked like oil in an engine together, just knowing each other's spots, great timing, and the heels were bumping great. All 4 had solid strikes and the Midnights had wonderful double teaming stuff. The hot tag to Gibson worked better than Cornette's viagra and the false finish with the tennis racket was pretty unexpected. The finish was a botched hot shot that the R & R's reversed and it came off looking pretty bad. I know these guys have better matches in them together, and for the record, i've always enjoyed the Midnights and the Fantastics matches better.
Brian: I agree that this wasn’t one of these teams’ better matches pared off against each other. Jim Cornette and the referee paired off early on, which was one of many cheap heat antics used to get this crowd molten. Eaton and Morton both go over the top to the floor, then Stan Lane slammed Morton on the ground, which guaranteed at least one extra pain killer later that night. Midnight Express sold stuff largely well, like Lane after a fistdrop. Long build to a Gibson hot tag, which lead shortly to the finish, as he rolled up Lane as Morton tackled Eaton. This was satisfactory but not something you need to see.
4. Road Warriors vs. Skyscrapers - Chicago Street Fight (J:3 B:3)
Brian: I've been to Chicago three times and never saw anything like this. Masked Skyscraper (a last-minute replacement for injured Dan Spivey) eats a big boot from Hawk. Later, Hawk does a clothesline from the apron outside onto Mark Callous (Undertaker). Ron Simmons and Butch Reed (later known as Doom) show up at ringside in tuxedos. Both of the Road Warriors' clotheslines and dropkicks looked tremendous. Callous is thrown outside and decides to just walk away. The Warriors hit the "Doomsday Device" on Masked Skyscraper for the relatively quick victory. Afterwards, Theodore R. Long gets in the ring and the Warriors chuck him out over the top rope at Reed and Simmons like a Nerf ball. This leads to a big, wild brawl that featured little cooperation. There's a great visual of Hawk ripping open Butch Reed's tuxedo top and doing a number on his chest in the corner. This was fun, but about as substantial as a meal from McDonald's.
Jessie: This was a short brawl that the Warriors pretty much dominated. Feel bad for the Masked Skyscraper, whatever big, juiced out dude was hanging around the back, eating a chili burger, hoping to get squashed by Ranger Ross, then he gets thrown to the lions. Yeah, the Dropkicks were spot on and the clothesline on Taker outside was a highlight. Doom was looking awfully spiffy in their white tuxes and that brawl was just all kinds of unprofessional. Simmons was hit with his own foreign object, but it had as much effect on him as a paperwad.
5. Tom Zenk and Brian Pillman vs. Fabulous Freedbirds (J:5 B:5)
Jessie: This seemed to run pretty long. Hayes on offense is pretty limited, even though he can dance well and shake his cottage cheese hips. Garvin's hair was as preposterous as OJ's "If I did It" book. Pillman and Zenk were all over their much older counterparts as far as offense and the energy they put out carried much of the match's momentum. All the girlies in the crowd were practically already pregnant by these two. But, the match dragged out way too long and with Zenk on defense, it felt eternally agonizing. His selling was really awful, as he either adjusted his trunks or wiped the sweat from his eyes, as if he was working hard laying on his ass in a rear chinlock. I'm not sure why this match was decided to go this long but it suffered from it and during the finish, all 4 guys were confused and stumbling around like they were trapped in that stupid house from Saw 2. Moderately recommendable.
Brian: I don’t have many notes on this one, because as Jessie noted, it wasn’t the easiest thing to watch. I don’t mind matches that run long, as long as it fits the context and helps propel the story to that next level, but this just sagged during the second half like any of Jerry Lawler’s failed marriages. I do recall Pillman getting caught with a deliciously stiff Michael Hayes straight left punch in the corner. A flying crossbody by Pillman on Garvin lead to the end, putting this thing away quicker than this weekend’s local indy worker puts away Pillman’s kids now so he can spend six minutes sweating on top of Pillman’s old lady.
6. Stiener Bros. vs. Ole and Arn Anderson (J:5 B:6)
Brian: The crowd is hot early for the Stieners. Scott Stiener botches an atomic drop, forgetting to leave a knee out, leaving nothing there for Arn to drop on. Ole cranks his headlocks like the cagey vet he is. Scott does a wild suplex on Ole where he holds him in mid-air, kind of cradling him, and then just tosses him over his head. Arn eats a back elbow by Scott and falls out to the floor. Arn ignores Scott's attempt at ramming him into the stairs, then dodges a Stiener clothesline, leading to Scott's arm drilling the ringpost in an ugly spot. The Andersons both do a lot of work on the arm. Scott executes a breathtaking Frankenstiener. The Andersons whip Rick into the ropes, duck to presumably bodydrop him, but he puts on the breaks, kicks Arn, then does a quick roll-up on Ole for the surprise victory. While this is neither team's top shelf stuff, it's largely inoffensive, and especially recommendable for fans of the Steiners.
Jessie: Brian pretty much covered the majority of the big spots in this match. The Steiners were apparently pretty hyped up to whip on the old boys because they hurt Sting. Arn was pretty entertaining in this, outsmarting Scott and giving himself to be destroyed by Rick in an early spot. I loved one part where Rick punched Ole, but he dropped down hooking his legs onto Rick's ankles then kind of basked in what he had done as Rick desperately reached out for the tag, but coming up short. They had been building towards a finish, but it still came pretty suddenly. Arn was just young enough to bump well and hard for the Steiners and Ole was just old enough for me to wonder why he was still wrestling. overall, decent stuff.
7. Lex Luger vs. Ric Flair (J:5 B:6)
Jessie: As good as Flair is, I still say Luger had his prime in a series against Pillman. This match was long, longer than a story from your grandmother and had it's moments. The announcers even admitted it was booked on the fly due to Sting's injury, and you could tell because Flair transformed into Larry Zybyzsko by stalling for large amounts of time here. He did a lot of work with an armbar and Luger did some chinlock that was as boring as a Sunday church service when you're 5 years old. A really lame countout finish while Luger badly brawled with the Andersons left a real sour taste in my mouth and i was not pleased with this look into the past. On the positive side, Flair showed some really good psych by letting Luger build to his power spots, and i thought the crowd seemed pretty into it. But, overall this didn't jump out and grab your attention, nor did it really use that slow burn effect to make you unknowingly really get into this match despite it's long ring time. I enjoyed their Bash 88 match much more as they both showed more passion rather than a lackadasical attitude, even though their was another lame finish to that one.
Brian: Speaking of old ladies telling stories, did anyone ever find that shit hackneyed in Edward Scissorhands? I think I dug this more than Jessie, but very much akin to the earlier Rock ‘N’ Roll versus Midnight Express match, this wasn’t their best stuff by far. Luger’s neon green trunks were stunning. Flair picked apart Lex like a surgeon; funny story, Flair was once called Dr. Giggles in Greensboro after he dropped acid with a chesty waitress and seduced her in a trashy motel. She found out that night “Space Mountain” was in reality much more like “It’s A Small World After All.” Lex sells a back suplex like he woke up from a nightmare. There was some kind of botch on a powerslam where Luger fell on his ass like a chubby girl at a skating rink. A Luger powerslam led to the pin, but Woman reached in and slapped Lex like she did Benoit as he was choking the life out of her. Story is Lex had the title won, but abandoned it to fight in the aisle with the Andersons in an attempt to save Sting. The crowd helped make this match a little more memorable.
Thursday, November 1, 2007
NOAH Autumn Navigaton 10/29/06
1. Tsuyoshi Kikuchi and Tsutomu Hirayanagi vs. Mitsuo Momota and Atsushi Aoki - 3
2. Yoshinobu Kanemaru and SUWA vs. Ricky Marvin and Taiji Ishimori – 5
3. Tamon Honda and Shuhei Taniguchi vs. Scorpio and Murat Bosporus – 3
4. Masao Inoue, Kishin Kawabata, and Ippei Ota vs. Doug Williams, Nigel McGuinness and Ares – 3
5. Akira Taue and Kentaro Shiga vs. Akitoshi Saito and Go Shiozaki – 4
6. Takeshi Morishima and Mohammed Yone vs. Jun Akiyama and Makoto Hashi – 6
7. Mitsuharu Misawa, Yoshinari Ogawa, and Kotaro Suzuki vs. Yoshihiro Takayama, Takuma Sano, and Takashi Sugiura – 4
8. Naomichi Marufuji vs. KENTA – 8
The opener pitted old, crusty vets against young, hungry dojo boys. Momota ate some pretty sick elbow strikes from Kikuchi, and Tsuyoshi returned the favor eating some of Mitsuo’s mean slaps. The finishing sequence got kind of flubbed. The tag bout was great junior heavyweight fare, with Marvin working faster than a hiccup, and all kinds of Americanized moves like the 619, Shining Wizard, and Swanton for all you McMahon indulgers. The next tag bout was less impressive. I’m a big Scorpio fan, but can’t hand over, as this was pretty much “teh suck” as those witty Internet girl bloggers are prone to say. I’m not sold on stout Russian Murat, either; his offensive looked pretty weak, especially his submission stuff. Taniguchi threw some tasty suplexes, though.
The following six-man tag bout was mostly comedy, and boy, is this Ares asshole just plain awful. Never saw him before, but any chap wearing a sleeveless shirt and a tie with a dollar symbol on it is helpless. There were some good European uppercuts thrown, but this was largely forgettable. The next tag bout wasn’t much better, but more memorable overall, especially for the visceral image of oldie Akira Taue selling a nut shot, hopping around the ring, doing physical comedy like Jim Varney in Ernest Goes to Jail.
The next tag bout featured a ton of talent, and was mostly real good. There was a pin sequence that got messed up, but otherwise, this was pretty solid. Morishima and Yone tried to do a Doomsday Device on Akiyama, but while on Takeshi’s shoulders, Jun caught Yone in mid-air and hit him with an Exploder that made me cream jeans. The six-man bout wasn’t too good, as Misawa looked real tired and unmotivated, Takyama’s horse face made me ill, etc. It was still kind of nice seeing Suzuki and Sugiura hanging with the bigger guys. The main event was nothing short of outstanding, as the future of NOAH put on an excellent match. I think that, several years from now, these two could be able to deliver a match I’d rank a 10, as all the right ingredients were here, just not the proper structuring, psychology, and emotion. There were tons of big spots, though; more than I care to recall, and honestly, you really owe it to yourself to see them firsthand. KENTA just murdered Marufuji with brutal kicks throughout it, too.
2. Yoshinobu Kanemaru and SUWA vs. Ricky Marvin and Taiji Ishimori – 5
3. Tamon Honda and Shuhei Taniguchi vs. Scorpio and Murat Bosporus – 3
4. Masao Inoue, Kishin Kawabata, and Ippei Ota vs. Doug Williams, Nigel McGuinness and Ares – 3
5. Akira Taue and Kentaro Shiga vs. Akitoshi Saito and Go Shiozaki – 4
6. Takeshi Morishima and Mohammed Yone vs. Jun Akiyama and Makoto Hashi – 6
7. Mitsuharu Misawa, Yoshinari Ogawa, and Kotaro Suzuki vs. Yoshihiro Takayama, Takuma Sano, and Takashi Sugiura – 4
8. Naomichi Marufuji vs. KENTA – 8
The opener pitted old, crusty vets against young, hungry dojo boys. Momota ate some pretty sick elbow strikes from Kikuchi, and Tsuyoshi returned the favor eating some of Mitsuo’s mean slaps. The finishing sequence got kind of flubbed. The tag bout was great junior heavyweight fare, with Marvin working faster than a hiccup, and all kinds of Americanized moves like the 619, Shining Wizard, and Swanton for all you McMahon indulgers. The next tag bout was less impressive. I’m a big Scorpio fan, but can’t hand over, as this was pretty much “teh suck” as those witty Internet girl bloggers are prone to say. I’m not sold on stout Russian Murat, either; his offensive looked pretty weak, especially his submission stuff. Taniguchi threw some tasty suplexes, though.
The following six-man tag bout was mostly comedy, and boy, is this Ares asshole just plain awful. Never saw him before, but any chap wearing a sleeveless shirt and a tie with a dollar symbol on it is helpless. There were some good European uppercuts thrown, but this was largely forgettable. The next tag bout wasn’t much better, but more memorable overall, especially for the visceral image of oldie Akira Taue selling a nut shot, hopping around the ring, doing physical comedy like Jim Varney in Ernest Goes to Jail.
The next tag bout featured a ton of talent, and was mostly real good. There was a pin sequence that got messed up, but otherwise, this was pretty solid. Morishima and Yone tried to do a Doomsday Device on Akiyama, but while on Takeshi’s shoulders, Jun caught Yone in mid-air and hit him with an Exploder that made me cream jeans. The six-man bout wasn’t too good, as Misawa looked real tired and unmotivated, Takyama’s horse face made me ill, etc. It was still kind of nice seeing Suzuki and Sugiura hanging with the bigger guys. The main event was nothing short of outstanding, as the future of NOAH put on an excellent match. I think that, several years from now, these two could be able to deliver a match I’d rank a 10, as all the right ingredients were here, just not the proper structuring, psychology, and emotion. There were tons of big spots, though; more than I care to recall, and honestly, you really owe it to yourself to see them firsthand. KENTA just murdered Marufuji with brutal kicks throughout it, too.
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