1. Danny Davis vs. George “The Animal” Steele – 2
2. Bret Hart vs. Randy “Macho Man” Savage – 5
3. Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy – 6
4. Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Hercules Hernandez – 4
I’m not sure why Steele didn’t go over clean, as they protected Davis, letting him get disqualified. And, what a bizarre DQ it was – Davis’ foot inadvertently hit the ref in the chest while Steele was carrying him around, leading the ref to overact like a middle school girl throwing a tantrum and immediately call for the stoppage of the bout. I was left scratching my head, just like after seeing The Matrix Revolutions. Hart and Savage was good, I mean, these two were total machines back then. Savage had to be on speed, and I’m surprised he’s still as mobile as he is today, because he was just insanely reckless and physical and not afraid to kill himself. Elizabeth’s facial were the best, she portrayed worry better than any of today’s A-list celebrity sluts. Come on, you know Anne Hathaway does anal, right? Savage totally eats it on a backdrop over the rope to the floor. Later, Savage scores a surprise roll-up for the victory, the crowd pops, as does lids of bottles of painkillers in the locker room.
This is the consummate Hogan match. It dawned on me that Bundy was really one of Hulk’s all-time best opponents. He’s small enough to be agile and mobile, but big enough to still be portrayed as a monster equal to Hogan’s strength and stature. This was both men in arguably their prime. Andre the Giant tripped Hogan, he was ejected, and then the match restarted. They go back to the formula, but it works, and I’m enthralled again like I was when I was 5 seeing this for the first time. The finish isn’t the most satisfying, as Hogan gets counted out due to Bobby Heenan’s involvement, but they didn’t want to deliver the payoff to the feud on free television, rightfully so, and this was a great way of keeping interest in it.
The main event was a very interesting match-up; two guys I’ve never seen work each other prior. It’s not long, and keeps a pretty fast pace. There’s a double count out, Bigelow grabs the microphone and yaks, which I suppose persuades the ref to restart it, as the match continues. The ending sees Bam Bam totally annihilate Hercules with a bodyslam, and I must say, if everybody did that move like this, that’d make the bodyslam credible again, not just a tame set-up maneuver that it’s been reduced to these days. Then, Bigelow goes to the apron, almost falls backwards on his gigantic ass, but regains composure and does a slingshot splash (eat your heart out Mike Awesome, oh wait, you’re dead, too) to get the victory.