1 The Spirit Squad w/ Mitch v. Ric Flair/ Dusty Rhodes/ Sgt. Slaughter/ Ron Simmons w/ Arn Anderson (Traditional Survivor Series Match)- 3
Damn! (turning into the most overused catchphrase in all of WWE) This was a quick, quick match; quicker than Vinnie Mac lasted with Sable in bondage. None of the legends, save Flair albeit briefly, got to do anything except look old. It was nice to see AA out and about at ringside, and even sneak in a cheap shot, but other than that, this match said nothing. The Sprits, who they have been teasing as breaking up, all united in an attack on Flair at the end. I'm as bewildered as Flair is the first time Missy Hyatt squirted on him.
2 Chris Benoit v. Chavo Guerrero- 6
This was a dogfight full of stiff shots from both men. This was the Chavo I've been wanting to see for a long time. I absolutely hate these Edddie angles and am apalled that they are on my TV, but it's argubly Chavo's best in-ring of his career. And Benoit was at his most brutally finest. A cool finish capped off this match, even though I would have liked to have seen it go longer.
3 Lita v. Mickie James- 4
Lita has finally retired?! Are you kidding me? Who have I been nice to to receive this generous award? Thank you, God, Buddha, Ali, Santa Claus, Kwaanza Tim, Leah Remini, Pedro Cerrano, and Fry Guy, or anyone else in the world who had anything to do with this! Now, the top of my 5 most hated WWE performers has left the promotion, (now, if we could get JBL, Kane, The Miz, and Stephanie McMahon to pack it up, I'd be one happy camper.) And her last match was decently passable. These two were not working together well, but a nice series of several near falls and reversals bumped this gem up to a four.
4 HHH/ Shawn Michaels/ CM Punk/ Jeff Hardy/ Matt Hardy v. Edge/ Randy Orton/ Johnny Nitro/ Gregory Helms/ Mike Knox (Traditional Survivor Series Match)- 2
This one really had some potential, but instead we'll just put DX over. God, I would be totally offeneded if I had ordered this PPV (instead I watched it from the loud luxury of a local BW-3's, kept busy by some chicken and shrimp.) This wasn't really a match at all; it was merely an unfunny, show fest for Team DX. They all got over, HUGE and the heels in this match looked like idiots. They were swept and swept easily. This booking is hurtful to the couple of up and comers on the heel team and did nothing for DX, except give them another easy night off where they stepped into the ring and did nothing athletic.
5 Undertaker v. Mr. Kennedy (1st Blood Match)- 3
Another disappointment. I was really enthralled with their No Mercy match, but this was just one big gimmick. MVP was involved for 2/3 of the very short match and I don't like him or his involvement. I realize Taker was hurt and I think that is the reason this was such a stinker. Taker was split with a chair shot that he completely blocked, but Kennedy took one of the stiffest chairs in recent memory, where the chair actually got wrapped around his neck. That bumped this up from a 2.
6 Big Show/ Umaga/ Finlay/ Test/ MVP v. John Cena/ Lashley/ Kane/ Sabu/ Rob Van Dam (Traditional Survivor Series Match)- 4
The eliminations went quiclky in this match as well. Finlay worked the majority of it for his team and showcased some of his punishing offense. Umaga, RVD, Test, Sabu, and MVP all went out rather quickly. Kane did nothing but get eliminated and then we had a few minutes of action. Lashley and Cena, the two survivors, were the only ones who looked like stars. Lashley for being so dominant during the match and Cena, for hitting a monstrous F-U on Show to win the match.
7 King Booker v. Batista- 4
A losing effort for Smackdown's best competitor right now, King Booker. We're back to Dave as champion. Batista's lacking performances are so bad and so evident, they were turned into an angle, yet he still wins the World Title. There's something wrong here. His showing in this match was quite awful, but Booker managed to pull some things together to make it a passable effort. After such a bland show that had a lot of hype and intrigue, I was hoping for something special from these two and they just didn't have the goods. Batista's title run will be as short Little Tokyo's dick, or Scott Hall's life expectancy.