Wednesday, November 16, 2011

TNA Turning Point '11

1. Robbie E. vs. Eric Young - 4
2. Mexican America and Sarita vs. Ink Inc. and Toxxine - 4

3. Austin Aries vs. Kid Kash vs. Jesse Sorensen - 5
4. Rob Van Dam vs. Christopher Daniels - No DQ Match - 4

Unlike Santino and Hornswoggle I actually enjoy the comedic stylings of one Eric Young. My beard is getting beastly but it hasn't quite reached Young-like proportions. Fun comedy match to start that got the crowd into it having fun. Six-person intergender was also fun stuff. Show started with a good energy that made me wish iMPACT! could capture that same mood. Anarquia is good at selling and has a presence that makes him more watchable than the stock gimmick character he portrays. Hernandez continues to be apparently shrinking -- he must know Scott Lang. Toxxine and Sarita had a nice little exchange at the end of this. Three-way X Division bout was one of the show highlights. Sorensen handed out a signed football to a kid in the crowd who sort of shrugged his shoulders and accepted leeringly. You can tell Kash is really trying to give Jesse his lumps and make him earn a spot as he was just discoloring his chest with real mean chops and laying stuff in. Aries' timing was great per normal and he kept this propelling forward. Really great stuff all around. Daniels feigned wanting to do a "classic technical match" in lieu of "hardcore" so did a bunch of chinlocks, etc. didn't really come off like he wanted to keep it grounded but that he didn't have much in his arsenal to use when he kept breaking out the same hold. Felt like a house show match with not a lot of effort nor crowd heat. It did have a few nice bumps including Daniels' on the entrance ramp and RVD taking a back bump on a chair.

5. Matt Morgan vs. Crimson - 2
6. Abyss and Mr. Anderson vs. Scott Steiner and Bully Ray - 4

7. Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky - 3

Man, this next match, really, see it, as it was some of the most unintentionally hilarious shit. Crimson and Morgan are supposed to be these two giants, a real clash of the titans, or so we're lead to believe. Morgan's facial acting throughout was just Ed Wood-level cheese. His expressions, like after Crimson kicked out of one of his signature moves, and he did one of those nods of acknowledgment, were just goofy, like Chris Klein as Charlie Nash in Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li (2009) bad. Then they tried to recreate the infamous Takayama/Fyre slugest but instead of bashing each other's face they looked like two first graders slap-fighting over a box of crayons, I mean, Crimson's weak punches were landing square on Morgan's shoulder, time and time again, nowhere near his face. This just looked so outrageously bad. Tag match was fun, I guess besides stopping bleaching his hair, Anderson's also quit going to the gym, as he came in looking soft and doughy. That made him getting tossed all over the ring even more fun for me to chuckle at. Seemed like Ray and Scott were trying to kill him throwing him recklessly and making him take big bumps like superplexes right on his head and neck. Scott has a presence that's undeniable, at a TNA house show I attended awhile ago, even on an undercard match, he captured the crowd and held them in his performance more than anyone else. Same sort of thing here as him being a heel got good reactions. And right now Bully Ray (wouldn't have believed it 5-10 years ago) is one of the best heel acts in the entire world. Scott taking the loss on a weak sideslam or whatever by Abyss was very flat. Women's match has to be considered a failure and even then it was better than anything birthed from the 3+ month feud Kelly Kelly was been embroiled in over in WWE. Velvet just had a real off-night, her offense looked preposterous, she even threw some leg kicks that looked like they were being thrown by Cain Velasquez's three-year old daughter. Kim had to really work down to her level. Madison Rayne interfered and botched some eyesore move she attempted. I was bummed this didn't go better.

8. Jeff Hardy vs. Jeff Jarrett - 2

9. Jeff Hardy vs. Jeff Jarrett - 4

10. Jeff Hardy vs. Jeff Jarrett - 1

Hardy came to the ring with a stupid purple Predator-looking mask with ram horns. He probably drew up the design for that while high on PCP. Hardy beat Jarrett in six seconds with a Twist of Fate. Jarrett wanted some 'mo. Second match was like a 7 min. sluggish bout but Hardy did what he does best and better than most and that's sell simple stuff like death and make it look much better. Hardy won again. Jarret interrupts Hardy's walk up the aisle by knocking his brains out with a steel chair. Jarrett tossed Hardy's carcass back into the ring and hit The Stroke but Hardy used a backslide and beat Jarrett thrice. I liked the shock of the first win, second match was just there but I enjoy watching Hardy play dead, third one, well, put Hardy over pretty large, but not something I can score too high.

11. Robert Roode vs. AJ Styles - 6

Main event went nearly 30 min. Crowd was dead after the first couple matches so that hurt the effectiveness here. First time I sat through this, was on the phone with fellow NHO co-founder Jessie, discussing, amongst other things, the disbandment of our tag team BBC (Big Black Cock) of "Pope" D'Angelo Dinero & "King" Mo Lawal in our fantasy wrestling league, etc. and my impression of the match was longer, dryer iMPACT! TV main I'd go with a "5" at best. I re-watched it, though, since I didn't get a real good sense of it the first time through. I liked it a lot more. Styles, despite being banged up, and he was working slower than normal and with less confidence, still did a damn good job on a real bum ankle. He should have been home resting his injury on the sofa watching repeats of Bored to Death on HBO. I thought AJ was dead after missing a suicide dive to the floor and going splat. This was constructed like an old, regional match, sort of the Flair formula, where the heel champion gets beat down in a long match but gets the quick roll-up win with tights to keep the gold. They did their roles pretty well, Roode's heel stalling and selling were good (not great) but like this role better than the force-fed face persona I personally never bought (even when the rest of the world rioted post-Bound for Glory '11 when Bobby didn't win the belt).

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