Saturday, March 5, 2011

WWA International Lucha Libre

Hey guys and dolls, this month we're going international, no, nothing to do with spy or espionage, just venturing past the good old fashioned USA for our wrestling and your entertainment and traveling down south to watch some Lucha Libre and across the sea to the great land of Asia and to find and study the best in Puro action. Today i begin my lucha quest with a show from a mixed bag DVD Brian bestowed upon me years ago, i visit it every now and then and thought it the perfect source to cull upon for this month's festivities.

1) Misterioso/ Panderilla 1 & 2 v. Raul Guerrero jr/ Venum Black/ Tinieblas jr- 3
2) Depredador/ Rey Mysterio sr/ Nicho v. La Parka/ Super Parka/ Super Porky- 2
3) Raging Dog v. Nicho El Millionaro- 3
4) Enfermo jr/ Panderilla 1 & 2 v. Arandu/ Catedratico/ Venum Black- 4
5) Lola Gonzalez/ Kayra v. Lola "La Lucha" & Ayako Hamada-4
6) Rey Mysterio sr/ Super Porky v. Raging Dog/ Steve Master - 3
7) Dr. Wagner jr/ Cien Caras/ El Hijo del Diablo/ Juventud Guerrera v. El Hijo del Santo/ Rey Mysterio jr/ Perro Aguyao/ Mil Mascaras- 4

Opener was pretty standard for Lucha action, faces go over big in the first fall, outsmarting the heels like Inspector Clousteau (yeah, that's dated). 2nd fall was a huge mess, with the Panderillas being the sloppiest brawlers this side of TNA's security guys, rocking really old Pantera shirts. Tinieblas is talented but he was having too much fun being the big star of the match and doing little as possible to extend his muscles. 3rd fall picked up, some good momentum switches, but a low blow as a finish is as creative as doing ANOTHER Montreal finish.

2nd bout was all comedy but fell as flat as Community's Christmas ep. Not sure which Park was which, but La Parka and Nicho worked some cool armdrags on the concrete and some shelved stuff from old 97 Nitro 8 mans. Porky was sweating profusely walking down the aisle and Nicho's partners both would have looked better ringing me out at Autozone, as there was nothing athletic about them or their performance.

I really wasn't into this singles match, for some belt they were pushing. It had tons of interference, so remiscent of most Russo booked shit, incl some fat manager and bald Mr. Clean looking guy wearing the same zubaz that Power Team USA steroid heads on the Church channel used to wear. Dog as really bland, as much as water flavored sex scents. He used about 5 bodyslams, the most complicated thing he tried. Nicho was exceptionally sloppy too, pulling off several ddt's that got worse the more he tried. He bladed like Hansen, Flair, any old schooler who used to rip flesh on a nightly basis, but this one was really unnecessary, as it didn't add any heat to the match.

This match was a step in the right direction; Enfermero jr had a huge lion's mane, body of a gas station attendant, but he was old school, these awesome looping Eaton uppercuts, knew his way around the ring, he was keeping this together. Panderilla's weren't as bad here either, being in the right spot for most of the faces stuff. Venum used to be really exciting but here he was just a long haired dude who could jump off high stuff, like an actor waiting for his cameo Venum just toyed around the rest of the bout. That being said, the whole ending spot was cool with all the planchas including Venum's into the front row of the stadium seated crowd.

Lola is like the grandmother of Lucha women's wrestling, seen her several times before and I would not mess with her; guarantee she's wrapped Konan up a few times and made him suck her toes. She works almost exclusivley with Hamada for the first 2 falls, which is best case scenario, really dug some of the intricate holds they were trading on the ground, like recipes after the match. Kyra was actually a young Melina, who wasn't there to show off any of her offense or splits, but to take a Hamada ass whipping like a true woman. Pretty sure this would ready her for Batista's rough play later on in Connecticut. Lola was in a prison outfit and basically got thrown around by her hair from the other Lola like a 6 year old girl whips around her Cabbage Patch doll.

Funny bout here as they weren't having any of Porky's comedy and he was struggling to get through, tons of rest holds for him. Rey Mysterio Version 1 isn't bad at all; he has some real good facial selling and does not take a back seat to anyone, as a fan at ringside helped untie him from the guard rail where he bashed the heel manager with a cerveza and then worked over his leg with a steel chair. Master was slightly better than Raging Dog, who was more like lame mutt again. Ending was another schmaze, better than a low blow.

Tons of big names filled the ranks here but after the 1st fall (which was a Santo display with a Mascaras ego trip) it was one long fight. No structure to this at all, guys just coming and going like a battle royal almost. Caras was really vicious attacking Aguayo, who's a nasty visual on my nice laptop screen. Diablo and Santo were running a nice angle, with both men going after the other's mask. Juvi and Rey Rey worked almost exclusively with each other, and for the best, as no one else could keep up with them. Faces go over in the end, much to the dlight of all the kiddies in the audience.


Brian said...

hey! i liked the Community Christmas ep! much better than that Michael Scarn movie ep. of The Office two three weeks ago

Geo said...

The toe sucking comment had me in stitches.

Jessie said...

oh man, i didn't even crack a smile watching that....and i'm usually laughing out loud at Community....neat idea the Scarn thing, but i'm sick of everyone in that cast acting like grown adult babies....i'm nearly done with that show...