Viva La Lucha: Continental Conflict

1) Horus, Angel Metalico, & Xtorm vs. Civico, Tony Casanova, & Zarco – 2
2) NY Knockout Nikki & Miss Jackie vs. Christina Von Eerie & Jennifer Blake – 1
3) Natural Selection (Brian Cage & John Ricker) vs. Los Luchas (Zokyre & Phoenix Star) vs. RockNES Monsters (Johnny Goodtime & Johnny Yuma) – 5
4) Mascara Sagrada & KAFU vs. Misterioso & Vaquero Fantasma – 1
5) Extreme Tiger & Jack Evans vs. X Fly & Bestia 666 – 3
6) Charlie Haas, Super Crazy, & Tommy Wilson vs. Konnan, Damien 666, & Halloween – 1
7) Blue Demon Jr., Booker T, & El Mesias vs. Shelton Benjamin, Big V, & Hernandez – 4

The first bout was a three falls match, which is the norm of lucha trios matches. Some really basic stuff from Xtrom and Zarco to start out with. The heels controlled the pace by stalling for 95 percent of the first fall. Zarco looked like a complete fool by just coming in, looking out to the floor, and then having Metalico dive over him. Second fall got a little better with Horus doing a bunch of highspots and Metalico executing a flying headscissor to the outside. Second fall had a unique finish where Civico gave Zarco a Styles Clash off the second buckle onto Metalico. Third fall was a mess with the referee taking a siesta to grab a few burritos while there were tons of legal man issues happening all around. The triple jump spots from the Horus, Metalico, and Xtorm were cool, but not enough to save the fact that the match ended in a double count out that gave the match and ending flatter that the 2007 film The Mist.

Ladies match was worse than what you would see on a weekly diva’s bout. Yes, the Miss Jackie featured was Jackie Gayda of WWE fame and yes, she had a scary resemblance to Karen Angle. Lots of legality issues during Jackie’s face in peril segment. Nikki’s clotheslines were quite awful and when Jackie tried to do Kofi Kingston’s spinning-flippy-pin move and almost blew it, I chuckled.

Three way tag was a lot of fun. It was from an NWA promotion called Championship Wrestling from Hollywood. Right out of the gate was a brawl featuring Johnny Goodtime doing a wild moonsault off the wall. I enjoyed the energy and intensity of the RockNES Monsters and I’d like to see a lot more of their tag work. Ricker busted out a sick side slam. The tower of doom spot was really nutty. Los Luchas just kind of stood on the apron, not contributing much. Cage at one point almost botched up a doomsday device. Lots of fun stuff here if you like non-stop action with minimal selling.

Tag bout with Mascara Sagrada from PWR was really bad. Sagrada and Misterioso started off the match, didn’t make any physical contact what-so-ever, and then tagged out. Seriously? It took five minutes for physical contact to occur! Fantasma took a hip toss on the ramp from Sagrada in probably the best bump of a match that was pretty much bump free. Wait, why is Misterioso using a chair on Sagrada? Chairs were blatantly used in front of the referee and much like the the first match, the referee just sat back and let it happen. The announcers compared KAFU to Bruiser Brody, I’m guessing because he dressed a bit like him. He sure doesn’t work like Brody. KAFU’s offense and selling really need some work. Sagrada looked really old and really slow. Why did Misterioso take off his mask and give it to some perplexed dude in the crowd? Goofy restart didn’t help this either. Puke.

So X Fly was apparently Mosco de la Merced in a previous life. If so, then he’s put on some weight. I’m not sure if Evans messed up on a moonsault of not but he did catch the rudos with a pair of nice elbows. I remember Xtreme Tiger from the shitty Mexican Deathmatch Wrestling DVD where he was wrestling outdoors and jumping off rooftops. I’ll give him his props though, he did a wild plancha to the outside, took a big back drop onto a ladder, and executed a 450 splash off the top to the outside. Second fall featured Fly kicking Evans in the stomach while he was break dancing, which automatically makes him the smartest man in wrestling. Evans has some cool moves but it still seems to me that he belongs on a gymnastics team. What’s with the random music going on during this? Another confusing point was that the announcers at the end of the second fall said that the rudos have to pin both technicos but yet at the end of the first fall, only one technico pinned a rudo. I’m confused. A pretty sick muscle buster from Bestia mercifully ended this.

Konnan and his group interfered at the end of the previous bout with a bunch of useless stuff. Konnan looked really terrible in his Lakers jersey and jeans. What, did you just do some blow and roll up in your Caddy before the match started, esse? He’s my candidate for worst wrestler on the last decade. In the ring he’s so unethused and disinterested. Crazy turned on his team and the end of the first fall ending this one and thus negating the supposed other two falls. Haas was the best looking person in the match but with the people involved, is it any surprise?

Main event was more choreographed than a performance of Fiddler on the Roof. Viscera (aka Big V) looks like he lost some weight. Damn, he busted out a nice Boss Man slam. Match was a complete mess and had a bunch of legal man issues. I liked the exchanges between Blue Demon and Hernandez. The chop exchange between Hernandez and Mesias was nice as well. Booker got his typical stuff in without exerting much effort. Quite honestly, no one in the match seemed to care, as was pretty much the case with the whole event. Lots of potential but not much sustenance.