WWE Royal Rumble 2010

Happy Birthday Savannah!

1) Christian v. Ezekiel Jackson- 5
2) The Miz v. MVP- 2
3) Sheamus v. Randy Orton- 4
4) Michelle McCool v. Mickie James- 1
5) Undertaker v. Rey Mysterio- 6
6) Royal Rumble Match- 5

It's Rumble time folks! Let's get started..............
Christian was the perfect Coach handbag to Jackson's power game (meaning compliment) He got the most out of Jackson we've seen so far with gnarly bumping and just being there in front of Jackson as he did was he does best. Plus his half slap/half punch was on the mark each and every time. Some awkward positioning of his moves will come with time, unfortunately, we lose Regal within 5 minutes on his only role of the night, they've wasted so much valuable time with such a great performer there. Flash pin finish a little strange but i'd like to see more of these two.

Our tacked on match was as appetizing as a live goldfish, MVP's face offense makes him look like Gumby with the sloppy execution, Miz is one of the only bright spots on Raw nowadays but besides his swank corner clothesline and smart package rollup, this match offered nothing besides confirmation we'll see more of it in the future, Awesome, really cool, i'm really excited....stoked, looking forward to it......bright future, the prospect of more is really........yeah.

I was pleasantly surprised with the results here, Cool limb work from both men, Sheamus backbreaker made everyone in the room cringe, Orton's usual off the charts physical selling, even storyline development going forward, so the match did everything it was supposed to do. Sheamus is so damn pale he's near invisible, we all kidded about Jason and Grant finding EVP's of bad Sheamus promos, and of course then explaining exactly what an EVP is for the 1,000 th time.

Women's match was your feel good moment of the year, bwahahaha, even though I have found the angle to be cruel and unnecessary, the pig suit stuff makes me exponentially more interested in Layla. I'm sure we haven't seen the last of this either.

Really awesome Title match here, these two guys are both severely banged up, total Mel Gibson Lethal Weapon types, but even still they push themselves to turn in great performances. Rey from the beginning was taking huge scary falls to get over Taker's ominence, (note to the director: please shy away from Taker close ups though, his strange chin and ex-tattoos are an eyesore) Awesome cry of anguish on knee being dropkicked from Taker and even to my amazement, he gave Rey a ton of neat opportunities to work him over, both men brought their A game and stole this show.

Onto the Rumble, every year they seem to go a different direction, this year there was no attempt at builidng the ring up full of guys, which always gives the fans more to look at but this was more about individual performances. Punk owned the first half but as much as I respect his mic work, the Rumble is the last place I want to hear some windbag guffaw it up for several minutes on end. Beth Phoniex surprised everyone and is probably now eligible to give amazing blow jobs after Punk busted her front teeth out with a sick GTS.....yes, i said it. Let's just breeze through some highlights quickly, Carlito looked like hell, weak ass punches, pitiful backcrackers left and right, he looks like a wet chichiuaua these days, ship him out. Matt Hardy getting only 10 seconds of action was a crock, HHH was completely forgettable....wait what did he contribute again? and then Shawn, who the Rumble story revolved around, was really unprofessional here, just tossing guys with no creativity or thought going into how they went out, 3 or 4 rising stars of the company discarded like his Vacation Bible School schedules and empty lydocaine needles. His frustration and anguish out of losing was quite well done and managed to pull the crowd into the match in an emotional way they normally wouldn't be, but that's all i can really commend him for. Also sure he wasn't happy with Cena dropping HHH on his face. No real stand out performance to speak of, i liked little things Cody Rhodes, Kofi Kingston, R Truth and John Cena all did, everyone else was kind of stalwart, I mean Cena, Batista and Edge as final 3 was almost like a B card show triple threat main event that I didn't want to see. Off hand, i guess i'd give best elimination to Zach Ryder, who tried to recreate Taka's face first fall in 2000 with a lesser degree of success. Overall, it didn't leave a terrible taste in my mouth like last year's Rumble match (maybe due to the excess of Gold Star Chili dip I was eating) but this doesn't break top 10 Rumble's either.