Wednesday, March 29, 2006

WWE Raw – 3/6/06

1. Shelton Benjamin vs. Ric Flair – 2
2. Kane vs. Triple H – 3
3. Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon – 1
4. Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon – 0
5. Eugene vs. Kenny – 3
6. Maria vs. Lita – 2
7. John Cena vs. Big Show – 4

Now this is awful wrestling! Benjamin and Flair have worked some decent matches together in the past, but this one only lasted a minute or two, with a quick and lame finish seeing the referee disqualify Flair for poking him in the eye while Benjamin was simultaneously tapping out to Flair’s patented figure four submission. Next, Kane and Triple H, two main event players, put together a completely forgettable and disappointing match; thankfully, they kept it relatively short, because I don’t know how much longer I could have watched Triple H weakly selling Kane’s atrocious excuse for punches.

In a backstage skit, Michaels was drugged, leading him to get loopy in a losing effort against Shane McMahon. Then, in the first match I’ve ever given a 0 grade to, Vince, overacting as usual, climbed onto the unconscious Michaels to score a pin. Eugene worked Kenny of The Spirit Squad in a filler match, containing zero effort—thanks a lot, guys!

Do I really need to tell you how bad Maria versus Lita was? It sucked harder than Francine did backstage after bad ECW shows. How’s that? In the main event, Cena bumped around for Big Show in yet another throwaway match, all of which are leading to the upcoming WrestleMania pay-per-view spectacular, which if anything like this episode of Raw, will be a thorough failure the likes of your attempt to get Rob Van Dam to autograph your bong outside a Denny’s in Dallas.

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