Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Roppingi Vice vs. Briscoes

Roppongi Vice vs. The Briscoes - ROH Death Before Dishonor XIII - 5

Roppongi Vice sounds like an STD you'd contract from a Minato prostitute. Feel oddly comforted in the fact that Mark Briscoe and I share the same wild hairstyle presently. Strangely Mark and Rocky give each other Dap after the opening salvo. Baretta doing much better for himself on the indies and in Japan than he'd ever have working on WWE's C-level shows. I heard he even got invited over to one of Tommy Dreamer's famed pig knuckle stews after a recent House of Hardcore show. All the silverware was courtesy of Abdullah the Butcher's baggy pants. Jay goes from World champ to selling double shoulderblocks by RPG Vice. Some credit is due to WWE for improving their tag division this past calendar year but ROH really has the best tag action around. They just need to bring Disorderly Conduct out of retirement to be the grizzled old vets that take shit from no one

If this is Death Before Dishonor someone should shoot Kevin Kelly as that beige jacket is a dishonor to fashion. Anybody know if Veda Scott eats meat? I dig how Mark's camo shorts are all tattered and ripped in shreds looks like something the Rat King wore. Mark absconds Trent's yellow headband thus absorbing his powers and pro wres prowess. Really dug Romero's flying knee off the apron onto Jay. Like to see Ryback attempt that and tear his quad and be out 8 months. Briscoes deserve to be in some kind of HoF when it's all said and done for giving us over a decade worth of gnarly. Baretta bleeding from the eye like he just took a John Dodson elbow in the clinch. Unreal "Buff Blockbuster" off the apron by Mark on Rocky where he looked shot from a circus canon. Jay Driller + Froggy Bow combo on Trent ends this. Pretty damn fun mid-show bout.

No comments: