I've finally done it, i started this project over 3 years ago and now i'm caught up....for a few weeks until Mania 28 hits us like a Rock promotional video.
Kerri Hilson (anyone else clueless on her?) sings the National Anthem; it's good but completely forgettable.
and yes, we had a host this year; a first, unless you count Bob Uecker. Rock is sweating Snoop going through airport security and promos for over 7 minutes; guess he felt like he had to for the exorbitant paycheck he got.
I'm over 20 minutes into the show and haven't seen a lockup yet.
Michael Cole just said "this is a showcase of pop culture." And we thought he couldn't top himself for stupidest thing ever uttered by a wrestling announcer.
1) Edge v. Alberto Del Rio- 5
First comment: I like all parties involved here, Del Rio, Ricardo and Brodus Clay (complete with t shirt with his name on it) my boy Jay Reso and actually Edge would be last on that list. This was good in that brief condensed 10 min. match that at 15 would have been significantly better (and probably outshined a lot of the main events) All the seconds were spot on here; liked that Christian got a hurty bump in there. Edge took a lot of emotionless bumps and didn't offer much offensively. The counters and the arm bar work was really good though and i wanted to see more of it.
2) Cody Rhodes v. Rey Mysterio - 5
Fun match with them cutting a pace near the end I don't think anyone else will match. I know Cody's daddy wasn't a great puncher but couldnt' he have at least asked Uncle Fred? They're weak sauce; speaking of sauce, Rey has a belly full of soy and egg rolls as that mid section is stretching his bomb ass Captain America outfit. But he can still bust a moonsault that would make Scorpio cough on his spliff. Middle section gets boring but the instinctual fast paced last few minutes is worth the wait.
3) The Corre (pause for laughter) v. Big Show/ Kane/ Santino Marella/ Kofi Kingston - 1
Has any, and I seriously mean this, any group looked so shitty on a bigger stage? This barely cracked 60 seconds but everyone got off 1 spot, yay, cash those checks boys but don't spend them all in place.
Rock has some funny moments with mae Young, Eve and Stone Cold, but no we won't remember them.
4) CM Punk v. Randy Orton - 5
The finish of a match is how the movie ends; it's the last chapter in the book; the last song of the opera. We all joked and jived about this one last year, and it's even the setup to it that makes it worse. But the bulk of this is quite good; Orton is still one of my favorite people to watch; it looks like before a really awesome superplex, he pauses and looks out to the crowd, his own moment, biting the ringpost while in a figure four, all the little things Orton excels at. Punk is so ROH here i'm surprised more people didn't appreciate what he gave in this one; their No Holds Barred match the next month would smash this though.
Pretty good HOF Class this year too
5)Jerry Lawler v. Michael Cole- 0
You could have accomplished this in probably 6-7 mins. but it took nearly 30 with ring entrances, cheesing, stunners and beer and mystery GMs that went nowhere. A complete travesty in it's own right.
6) HHH v. Undertaker - 5
This is a very unique match; it all hinges on these two guys, their long careers in WWE, and that people will pop for everything they do, mostly. This match really has no beginning, no middle, just one long ending filled with spots and no transitions or flow. That being said, the story part they have down pat and I think that part of their game being shown here helps both men's legacies as masters of their art in a good way. But this was nothing more than a midcard ROH match in their peak of 2005 just on a much grander scale with much larger paychecks.
7) John Morrison/ Trish Stratus/ Snooki v. Dolph Ziggler/ LayCool- 2
This as a fun way to spend 360 seconds, as much as anything could be. I for one like Mccool and her and Trish seem to be the only ones needed to work; Ziggler is completely wasted he's just a bump to this match. Fast paced though and didn't drag
8) John Cena v. The Miz- 3
This Mania made a shit ton of money; for the novelty of the Rock being there. But he completely overshadows this match. No one is into the slow build they try to start and it's really hard to get into Cena taking all this punishment when he looks like he beat guys like Miz up in high school. The original finish is so poorly conceived it's hard to believe there is a recession going on with a lot of people and yet whoever the WWE writers are are living a comfortable life. The restart is quick and exactly what the fans were waiting for, but this is a complete failure of a match.