1) Mike Quackenbush vs. Hallowicked (3/3/07) – 4
There was something about this match that just didn’t work for me. I think it may have been the fact that it seemed like they were trying to do a Chikara style match in front of a southern crowd who could give two shits less about that type of stuff. I think another thing that I wasn’t buying was Hallowicked as the heel. His motions seemed off and it looked like he wasn’t completely sure of himself in the ring. Another thing that bugged me was Hallowicked’s overselling of a Quack elbow to the knee. Quack laid it in gingerly but Hallowicked sold it like he’d been shot with the supposed “Magic Bullet” that killed JFK. The crowd didn’t seem to get behind Quack’s comeback either. Come to think of it, they didn’t really pop until Quack got the submission win. Maybe they were just happy the match was over. I sure was.
2) Hallowicked vs. Ricochet (5/5/07) – 4
Ricochet did one of the most ridiculous things I think I’ve ever seen. He’s running the ropes at one point and then inexplicably goes through them as if he was going to dive. The thing was that Hallowicked was just standing in the ring during this whole process. Then he flips Hallowicked to the floor and does a running Fosbury Flop and nearly overshoots Hallowicked. I then sit on the couch thinking to myself about if what I just witness made any sense what-so-ever. Hallowicked’s offense wasn’t much and Ricochet just seemed to be doing flippy moves for the sake of doing flippy moves, much like Teddy Hart. The commentators were equally as terrible, with the color guy trying to give his opinion of the Spider-Man franchise in the middle of the match.
3) Insane Lane vs. Cabana Man Dan (5/5/07) – 5
I was not expecting much out of this match, especially when I saw that Insane Lane was wrestling in a regular match and not a deathmatch. I chuckled at the spot where Dan tried to monkey flip Lane but couldn’t do it and accidentally kicked him in the balls. Lane showed me here that he can actually do something other than a deathmatch, although he was terribly winded by the time the match was over. He actually hit a few nice moves, such as a face first DDT from the top rop and a very high release German suplex. Dan did the same schtick that I’ve seen him do in all of the other matches he’s had. I’ll give him credit though, he nailed a sick variation of his “Surfs Up” finisher on the floor. This was better than what I expected.
4) Ladders and Light Tubes Match: “Diehard” Dustin Lee vs. Danny Havoc (5/5/07) – 5
Big ladder spot in the first few minutes where Lee shoves some light tubes into Havoc’s shirt and does a double foot stomp off the top of a ladder. Lee just looks like a garbage wrestler, with long, stringy hair and a dirty looking goatee. Lee took a sick German suplex with a light tube on him. The big ladder spot at the end with Havoc giving Lee a death valley driver through a ladder and light tubes, took a while to set up but was executed nicely. Still not sure why Havoc insisted on doing a roll-up for the pin. That stuff just looks out of place in matches like this. Both guys took a couple wild bumps in between the big spots but nothing to really make me say “see this match”.
5) Tables, Ladders, and Chairs Match: Chrisjen Hayme vs. Cabana Man Dan (9/1/07) - 5
Hayme ate a nasty chair shot to the head early on while they were brawling outside. I’ve seen enough Cabana Man Dan matches on this DVD to last me a lifetime. Hayme had Dan on a table and tried a splash over the top rope which he overshot like hell and landed face first on the concrete. There was a spot where Hayme got shoved off the apron through a bunch of chairs that were set up and Eddie Kingston over-reacted like crazy on commentary. You could clearly see Hayme look back and see where he was going to fall. Big spot at the end was Dan executing a sunset flip through a table off the top of a ladder. The table was way too close and Dan broke it with his ass on the way down. Better than their previous match on this set but the big spots were just came across as sloppy.
6) Barbed Wire Madness Match: Tank vs. Insane Lane vs. Freakshow (9/1/07) – 2
This match could have easily been omitted from this set and no one would have cared. The vast majority of the match was them stumbling around punching and stabbing each other. They did the Necro spot where everyone sits in a chair and punches each other much to the delight of no one. The crowd was so quiet at one point that you could’ve heard a mouse fart. There were exactly two high spots in this match. First was Lane doing a flying knee with a chair from the second rope and the second was Tank rolling like a fat, bloody bowling ball through a barbed wire covered table. This match sucked.
7) Light Tube Madness Match: WHACKS vs. Viking vs. Drake Younger (12/1/07) – 6
Short match but completely insane. WHACKS is this tall, piereced, and tattooed dude who just by watching him you can tell that he has no formal training whatsoever. He just goes out there and does stuff balls out without even caring. He took two falls directly on his neck. The first being a botched double back drop given to him by Drake and Viking. The second being the wildest of the two and he was charging into a corner, jumped, and then crashed into a bunch of light tubes. Drake and Viking had some good exchanges too. The finish was nuts. Drake was laid out across two chairs with light tubes on top of him while WHACKS hung from the ceiling and delivered one of the damndest spots I’ve ever seen, a hanging senton which damn near ripped Drake’s ear off! I suggest you look this up.
8) Devon Moore vs. Michael Elgin (2/27/09) – 3
Not much here to speak about as this was a very bland match. Neither guy really kicked into high gear, especially with the fact the crowd was so quiet. From what I’ve seen of Elgin, I haven’t been too impressed. He did hit a nice brainbuster but his rolling German suplexes into a crossface sucked. Moore was just there to bump for him and honestly looked like the didn’t give a shit about the match. The production value also dropped considerably on this match, as the picture was grainy and the hard cam was zooming in and out with no reason.
9) Exorcist Death Match: Thumbtack Jack vs. Scotty Vortekz (9/26/09) – 5
This does not involve Father Merrin from the Exorcist films, but it does involve three crosses made of light tubes. Some pretty crazy shit happening here. Jack slammed Scotty through a light tube cross on the outside, to which Scotty later shoved Jack off the ring apron through the other one to return the favor. Scotty took a hellish superplex from the top rope and landed flat back on a ladder. Holy shit! Jack headbutted Scotty so hard it sounded like two bowling balls hitting each other after they come out of the ball return. Finish was a sloppy GTS variation from Jack. Both guys took a hell of a pounding and pulled off a pretty good match.
10) Ultraviolent Boards and Cinder Blocks Match: Nick Gage vs. Thumbtack Jack (9/26/09) – 5
This was just wild from the get-go. Started off with Gage talking shit to some dudes in the front row with Jack diving on top of him from the buckle. Things just got crazier from there. From them getting tangled up in barbed wire, to Jack taking a stomach first tack bump on cinder blocks, and to Gage getting needles jammed in his dome, this was nuts. Gage was literally almost crying at one point from the pain, which doesn’t really jive with his tough, loud-mouthed prick persona. They got limited with what they could do at the end because they were both tangled up in some barbed wire but Jack managed to get his finish off on top of a bunch of cinder blocks.
Bonus Matches:
* Jeff Jarrett vs. Sweet Daddy (11/7/03) – 2
Jarrett working the indies? What? The match starts off with a bunch of referees ejecting some hillbilly dude from ringside. Oh Christ, the ring announcer is doing the commentary over the PA system and yells “WOOO” every time Jarrett does a strut. This just screams low-grade. Sweet Daddy is completely expressionless, even when selling. Ref bump and a Harris brother interferes and Jarrett does the guitar shot. Fuck this and the Dusty finish that followed. Same Jarrett match that you would find every week on TNA pay-per-views during this time. The sad part about this is that the referee took the best bump of the whole match.
* Barbed Wire Match: Mike Sweat vs. Ian Rotten (11/6/04) – 1
Mike Sweat is known in certain circles as the creator of the now popular “Faux-Hawk” hair style. You know it, short hair on both sides of the head along with a mohawk strip in the middle. It’s probably even more ridiculous looking than a mullet, but Sweat sports it proudly here while getting his face busted and bloodied by Ian in numerous ways with numerous items such as barbed wire, chairs, and light tubes. This was 98% Ian on offense and by the end of it, Sweat looked like the victim of an alley mugging. I’m not sure where Mike Sweat is today but let’s hope it’s nowhere near a wrestling ring.
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