Chronicles of NewJackia

I had a lot of partially watched shows needing completed on various streamers and felt like dusting off the old notebook. So, here’s some scores on partial shows which I’ve capriciously titled after my love of Chronicles of Narnia and New Jack (RIP).

WWE Monday Night RAW #1652 1/20/25

4) Damage CTRL (Dakota Kai & IYO SKY) vs. Pure Fusion Collective (Shayna Baszler & Zoey Stark) (w/Sonya Deville) — ✰½
5) Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre — ✰ ✰ ✰

Kai and Baszler started with some of the lousiest in-ring I’ve seen in ages. Just working at half-speed unsure of basic rope running sequences etc. and not on same page whatsoever. Stark enters with a springboard dropkick off the ropes that was AWESOME and woke the crowd (and me) up. Whatever Rollins is doing these days isn’t for me, but firm believer McIntyre may be his best suited opponent in the company. Drew brings a thudding intensity that by proxy makes Seth step his game up. Really solid TV main event.

ECW on TNN #10 10/29/99

2) Lance Storm (w/Dawn Marie) vs. Tommy Dreamer (w/Francine) — ✰ ✰½

This was actually a pretty stellar episode of the still in its infancy TNN show. Opened with a rare Sabu vs. Taz singles bout. Tommy enters in black track pants and a black shirt one size too small. I know Storm gets a lot of guff for his robotic style but that wasn’t an issue in ’99 I’m glad to report. He still had a lot of explosiveness and athleticism in pretty much all he did here. And I was actually loving this, but it was curtailed before it really got going (complete with a catfight, Raven run-in, etc. as was their bog standard at the time). The few minutes of wild brawling around ringside and into the first few rows of fans was fun and Dreamer smashing a $6 draft beer on Lance’s skull was au gratin.

WCW Thunder #33 9/24/98

6) Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Disco Inferno — WCW World Cruiserweight Title #1 Contendership Match

— ✰ ✰½

7) Alex Wright vs. Norman Smiley — ✰ ✰½
8) Kanyon (w/Raven) vs. Goldberg (c) — WCW World Heavyweight Title Match — ✰

I’ve been blowing through these Thunder episodes like Sonic speeding toward a chili dog food truck. They’re a blast but not the type you’d expect most people to be tossing out a lot of generous star ratings toward. So, I feel like I have to make a case for the slightly high ratings on the first two bouts. Disco versus Chavo the word that popped into my head was “fluid” while watching it. Not in the regard of it being seamless work – they just packed in as much as they could in the short time they were allotted (sick pescado to floor, Pepe hobbyhorse hijinks, springboard bulldog, etc.). The backstory was this was for a shot at the Cruiserweight championship. Disco won with a surprisingly sick piledriver. Post-match they bring out a scale and determine he’s too fat to fight for Cruiserweight belt for big LOLZ~!  Wright and Smiley was also quite fun. Honest to goodness I think I saw more genuine mat wrestling in this six min. match than all of Monday Night Raw’s run on Netflix thus far two months into it debuting there. Main went 10 seconds but gave it an extra half-star because how insane the audience was here for Goldberg it's just bonkers and unlike just about any phenomenon in wrestling history.

MSW Mid-South Wrestling TV #127 2/13/82

2) Paul Orndorff vs. Brian Blair — ✰ ✰
3) The Junkyard Dog (c) vs. Bob Roop — Mid-South Louisiana Title Match — ✰ ✰½
4) Bob Orton Jr. & Ed Wiskowski vs. Mr. Olympia & Ted DiBiase — ✰ ✰½
5) Frank Monte vs. Ron Cheatham — ½ ✰

Two Tampa boys tussling with Orndorff and Blair. If you only knew JYD from his WWF run, you have to go back and see him in his glory days. Guy was built a like a Grecian statue. Just insane upper-body and arms. And he was over like R.L. Stine at a Scholastic book fair. Tag match was fun, but the finish took place during commercial break. So they re-racked the tape and showed us the fin. Then, as is the norm on Mid-South, they toss on a bonus “standby” match to fill remaining TV time, but in this case, it literally got about 90 seconds before they had to roll credits rendering it null. If you’ve never seen Frank Monte though he’s a reoccurring enhancement guy that looks like a cross between Freddie Mercury and Rocky Johnson.

Big Japan Pro-Wrestling 5/28/10

Big Japan Pro-Wrestling

5/28/10 (aired 6/9/10 on Samurai! TV)
Korakuen Hall (Tokyo, Japan)

1) Isami Kodaka, Kankuro Hoshino & Mototsugu Shimizu vs. Atsushi Ohashi, Ryuichi Kawakami & Shinobu – 4
2) Ebessan & Yuichi Taniguchi vs. Daikokubo Benkei & Kanjyouro Matsuyama – 3
3) MEN's Teioh, Onryo & Shiori Asahi vs. Daisuke Masaoka, Hercules Senga & Tsutomu Oosugi – 5
4) Madoka & Shuji Ishikawa vs. Kazuki Hashimoto & Takumi Tsukamoto – 4
5) Daisuke Sekimoto & Yoshihito Sasaki vs. Takashi Sasaki & Yuko Miyamoto – 6
6) Jaki Numazawa, Jun Kasai & Masashi Takeda vs. Abdullah Kobayashi, Ryuji Ito & Shadow WX - Fluorescent Lighttubes Death Match – 8

Something that crystalized in this viewing was prime BJW and CZW share a commonality that I really, truly enjoy. While both are known primarily as death match purveyors, their bookers knew well enough to diversify the cards. And so you get a smorgasbord of pro wres~! Some novices getting in valuable ring time, high-flying action with juniors, hard-hitting feats of head-dropping fare, some theatrical flair, blood feuds and rivalries, etc. usually climaxing in a crescendo of carnage.

(Note: Sadly – some time has passed since my 1st draft of this piece, and I lost all my notes. I’m decided to still post it because I enjoyed the show and wanted to share that joy. I have thousands of pro wres discs and picked a routine BJW show at random and was so glad I did. I know in my notes I talked about digging Onyro’s undead ghost gimmick. I think perhaps at the time this aired, but even earlier than that, say ’99 or so when friends and I would trade RF Video catalogues around in study hall, BJW had seemingly seen its heyday and most of us had moved on. But watching this show made me think we took it for granted. The main event, which again, I wish I had more detailed notes on, was such a spectacle. Yes, we had some lukewarm crowd brawling early, but by the time they hit the thrilling final stretch, with one unbelievable death-defying bump after another, I was on the edge of my seat more than I was during any of the films nominated at the Oscar’s ceremony last weekend. The amount of torn flesh was like something out of the New French Extremity movement. Hard to pick an MVP .. maybe Ryuji Ito but all these barbaric dudes deserve their flowers.)

AEW Rampage #176 - Holiday Bash 2024 - Night 2

AEW Rampage #176 - Holiday Bash 2024 - Night 2 12/20/24

1) Mark Davis & Powerhouse Hobbs vs. The Don Callis Family (Brian Cage & Konosuke Takeshita) — ✰✰½
2) Action Andretti & Lio Rush vs. Goldy & Myles Hawkins — ½ ✰
3) Willow Nightingale vs. Harley Cameron — ✰ ✰
4) Brody King vs. Komander — Continental Classic 2024 Gold League Match — ✰ ✰ ✰½ 

Liked the opener – what it lacked in personality it made up for with sheer beef. Not unlike the ones Carmy served up at The Original Beef of Chicagoland. I wouldn’t let Mark Davis dogsit at my place, but he can sure bring the fierceness. Second bout was a short showcase of Rush and Andretti but what severely pulled me out of it is the referee didn’t even try to enforce the rules and let both guys run through about 2 min. of an offensive routine, both in the ring at the same time, to the dismay of purists everywhere. Cameron is great and Willow has grown on me as I catch up with the Khan era of Ring of Honor so was pleased with this. Main event I really dug. They did the big bruiser vs. high-flyer formula but did it exceptionally well. King was positively punishing with his chops and power. Komander’s chest looked like some roadside service station beef jerky. Then Komander’s rally to tip the balance back to his favor with an aerial attack was tasty. Very much worth seeking out on HBO Max.

Hodgepodge Hoagie

 “Zombie Princess” Jimmy Jacobs vs. Pentagón Jr. (TNA/TWR Penta Does Iowa 5/5/18) – 6
 
Main event of a Twitch stream co-promoted by TNA. Pentagón gets top billing and the show itself named after him. Undercard was mixed bag. Some Sami Callihan, Tommy Dreamer, Sugar Dunkerton, all your favorites. I’m glad Revolver gave Jacobs (wearing a corset and dress and smeared in blood) a rare headliner and he paid tribute to his IWA Mid-South past by making this a wild brawl. Lots of weapons were utilized and grotesque structures crudely erected to bump onto. Climaxed with Pentagón hitting his package piledriver on a gigantic sheet of wood which was laid atop 8 or so opened steel chairs for maximum bumpage.
 
Fallah Bahh vs. Eli Drake (TNA Xplosion #709 4/21/18) – 4
Taya Valkyrie vs. Alisha Edwards (TNA Xplosion #710 4/28/18) – 3
 
Bahh’s heft was on ample display. Fave moment came when Eli was sitting atop the buckles and Fallah just threw this swiping right hand and unceremoniously knocked Drake to the floor. Only irksome detail is because, due to his large size, the finish in Bahh’s matches are almost always some sort of roll-up because guys can’t hoist him up for their finishing moves. Alisha, now in 2024, is a great heel valet for The System faction, but was spunky newcomer still in TNA at this time. And this was pure butternut. Squash, that is. Best moment was it looked like Alisha was going to do one of those bulldogs where you kick off the top rope for an added momentum boost, and Taya just shoved her forward and Edwards took an ugly spill out of the ring. Valkyrie was booked dominant and screamed at the captive theme park crowd “Bring me some competition!” They were probably thinking, “Lady, I’m just trying to find the churro stand!”
 
Trent Seven vs. “Speedball” Mike Bailey (TNA Impact #1036 5/30/24) – 8
 
I’m reflecting on this one many days later and didn’t jot any notes at the time (or had even considered writing about it). But felt it was my civic duty to share some love toward it. These guys are a team under the guise Speedball Mountain and were only facing-off for a shot at Mustafa Ali’s X Division title at the next pay-per-view. This was at a taping in nearby Newport, KY – I was a bit lapsed in my TNA fandom at that time so regrettably missed the opportunity to be there live. Great match that I won’t spill too much ink on overselling to you – just strongly urge you to give it a watch. Lovely moment where a chop exchange got escalated when Bailey threw a mean chop to the upper-back of Trent. This broke the social contract as chops are generally only delivered to the chest. So the guys then proceeded to exchange cringe-inducing chops to each other’s backs. Lots of high-impact offense, Bailey’s kicks were as brutal and on-point as ever, sickening head drop bump on the apron, just a real gem.

RVD & Sabu vs. Lucha Brothers

Rob Van Dam & Sabu vs. Lucha Brothers (Fenix & Pentagón Jr.) - Impact Wrestling United We Stand 4/4/19 – 5

I was in attendance at ECW Heat Wave ’98 when Sabu & RVD faced off against Hayabusa and Jinsei Shinzaki. Then again, I was also in attendance (in the same city, conversely) for WWE vs. ECW Head To Head an all but forgotten TV special that aired live on 6/7/06 and saw RVD work the opener versus Rey Mysterio, and Sabu headline against John Cena. Needless to say, I have a vested interest in their extreme pairing, and seeing them trotted back out in 2019, nearly 20 years after I saw them live light the wrestling world aflame against the invading FMW team, caught my attention. Lucha Brothers were all the buzz in 2019 having been two of the biggest stars to materialize out of (sorely missed) Lucha Underground. They took their act across the globe showing up in PWG, AAA, AEW, APW, IWRG, AIW, AAW, MLW, wXw, and dozens of smaller lucha organizations. And now they were set to main event against the scarred, stoned, and semi-retired duo of RVD & Sabu. Cero Miedo, indeed!

Awesome ring gear by the Lucha Brothers. Kind of new age shiny samurai outfits. Pentagón’s was dark and purple like if Ivan Ooze and Super Shredder melded. Fenix was resplendent in gold and would have fit in snuggly with Chikara during the How to Hatch a Dinosaur era. I got worried when I looked at the remaining duration of the show and saw we only had about 8 min. left. 

Melee to begin. I forgot that I dig Sabu’s punches. Sabu tossing chairs like his ringside valet Super Genie does salads. Spot where Sabu on his knees waits ever so patiently for the Lucha Bros. to simultaneously kick him – looked like he was sitting in a dentist office waiting room thumbing through an issue of Highlights. Wonder if RVD ever smoked out with Jeff Hardy and classified himself as obsolete? You absolutely had to get the dual flying leg drops from opposite corners by Sabu & RVD through a table both Lucha Bros. were splayed on and they delivered with zeal. 

Finish saw Pentagón hit his Fear Factor package pildriver on Sabu with an assist from Fenix spiking it with a flying stomp off the top. Look I’m giving this a “5” on the famed NHO scale but with some caveats. In terms of its actual “worth” it’s no great shakes. But a “4” was the ceiling for a lot of those 4 min. 2005 Raw matches I’d jot notes on in the infancy of NHO. Didn’t feel right going that low. But couldn’t go any higher and it earned its score almost exclusively on vibes.  This was a compelling match on paper and the super abbreviated version we got of it was gleeful and stupid in equal, loving measure. Didn’t love Sabu taking a clean pinfall in a < 9 min. main event match; kind of like seeing Third Eye Blind live and shrugging after, “at least they played Semi-Charmed Life” and driving home thinking about where you were going to go on lunch breaks that week at work and all that Mid-Atlantic you still need to watch on Peacock.

Kiana James vs. Dana Brooke

Kiana James vs. Dana Brooke (WWE Main Event 10/27/22) – 2

Kiana rocking the business casual attire with the pinstripes and briefcase. Hope she’s clocked in because it’s time to work! James targets the arm early. Dana Brooke action figures are in abundance at my local Target. Nobody racing out for those. Brook hits a flipping neckbreaker for the victory with all of the panache and grace of a drunk fan falling down the stadium stairs at a football game.

Ring of Impact #8 - Epilogue

Are you ready for some more Ring of Impact? I don’t need a Gom jabber test (for you Dune fans out there) to surmise the answer.
 
Folks, it’s been real, and it’s been fun, and dare I say it, it’s been real fun? But just like Khabib Nurmagomedov and Jonathan Majors I’m getting out while I’m ahead. I’m guilty of the accusation of long-windedness (just revisit this projects’ own prelude mission statement) but I’ll try not to overindulge here. In short, I’m closing down the Ring of Impact project, in so far as an ongoing chronicling done via blog. I will be continuing to watch all of (I haven’t done the math but quick estimate I just tabulated is over 1500+ hours) TNA and Ring of Honor’s shows from 2017 to present in my own free time. In fact, I’ve already plowed through a dozen or so more shows.
 
Here's some notes on stuff I’d typed up for future editions – get them while they’re hawt:
 
TNA Xplosion #650 3/4/17
 
Robbie E vs. Marshe Rockett – 2
 
“Khaki suits, locs, chokes the grokest sacs / Got your drug cause you sprung on the gangsta mac” – from U Couldn't Deal Wit Dis by South Central Cartel
 
TNA Xplosion #652 3/18/17
 
ODB vs. Lauren Van Ness – 2
 
Another episode of Xplosion mysteriously missing from TNA+. Had to play Sherlock too as listings online made it a task to figure out what actually aired on this particular date. Watched this one outside my kids’ school because I’m a pro wres fiend. Didn’t know ODB still popped up on occasion. Laurel was still wearing smeared lipstick and chugging a bottle of bubbly after Braxton Sutter stood her up at the alter on Impact a while ago. Ugly finish as Van Ness appeared to land awkwardly on an ODB Samoan Drop that almost broke her arm.
 
TNA Xplosion #716 6/9/18
 
Fallah Bahh vs. Caleb Konley – 3
 
Only 2018 episode of Xplosion that is mysteriously missing from TNA+. Found it on the interwebz. Billed at 425 lbs. and wearing a pair of Yokozuna’s hand me down trunks nice to watch the big guy roll all over Konley. Caleb is accompanied by Trevor Lee who interferes liberally. Lee also holds a leg from outside to allow Konley the tainted victory.
 
TNA & WrestlePro Brace for Impact 2018 (Twitch) 2/9/18
 
1. Chris Avery Queling, Delroy & Habib from the Car Wash vs. Reality Check (Chris Steeler, KM & Talon) – 1
2. Colby Covington vs. Tyquil Woodley – 0
3. Chris Payne & Matt Sydal vs. Heavenly Bodies (Desirable Dustin & Gigolo Justin) – 2
4. Shawn Donovan vs. Moose – 2
5 Allie & Braxton Sutter vs. Nikki Adams & Nikos Rikos – 3
6. Teddy Hart vs. Bobby Wayward – 5
7. Eli Drake vs. Matt Macintosh vs. Anthony Bowens – 3
8. Alberto El Patron vs. Fallah Bahh – 5
9. Dan Maff vs. Johnny Impact – 6
Average Score: 3
 
(Editor’s Note: I'd jumped ahead and started working on this, the first Twitch special from 2018, because I was under the impression the only way I could watch it was on the Twitch mobile app on my phone. Then partway through I noticed TNA+ had added a section containing all the Twitch specials.)
 
We’re coming from what I always think of as the home of JAPW none other than the Rahway Recreation Center in Jersey. Opener is just the drizzling indie shits. CAQ is rocking a modern Norman the Lunatic gimmick and riding a two-year unbeaten streak. Habib the Car Wash Attendant is just … why? What are we even doing here? KM we know from his TNA appearances and does loud-mouthed heel shtick adequately. But this certainly wasn’t a good first look at WrestlePro. I’m actually a big follower of UFC but I did not need this “segment”. Colby’s MAGA shtick has lost any modicum of cultural cache, him stooging on Tyrone (or “Tyquil”) would be fine for a bit on a UFC pre-show or weigh-in special, but eating up time on a wrestling show was dispiriting. Dustin and Justin are about one-tenth the talent Jimmy Del Ray ever was. Sydal was kept on the apron. Real bad. Actively worst match I’ve seen of Moose’s and I’m a fan legit.
 
Nikki & Nikos working Grecian gimmick and all I could think about was Rikos’ outrageous attire looked like a Greece flag themed version of Super Mario Bros. 2 enemy character Phanto. Surprised to see featured TNA act Allie & Braxton take the loss here. Wayward was supposed to work Eddie Edwards who came out in street clothes and handpicked his replacement Teddy Hart. If Hollywood ever wants to make a movie about Hart’s exploits, they’ve got to hire Colin Farrell to play him. The resemblance is uncanny. Ironic Wayward is in pink and black gear. Bobby didn’t look bad, and Hart hit a few gross moves I liked. Weird seeing Drake who’s prominently in the TNA World title picture in a bland three-way. Weirder still that he didn’t win the match. Hadn’t seen Patron work in a while. Usually when people do those mounted punches, where you’ve got your opponent against the turnbuckles and you’re standing on the 2nd rope firing them down, they’re as weak as an Applebee’s $1 cocktail – but I like how Alberto really snapped them off and made simple strikes look nasty. I think Maff is still underrated to this day and is legit a top 20 2000’s indie guy, just has a harder resume to flaunt since a lot of it was on East coast indies and not the big spotlight feds.
 
Who won?
We all did. I hope you were entertained if you took the time and followed along the journey. Brief as it ended up being. Or if you discovered it long after and read it for the first time. In closing, I’m paying for Honor Club and TNA+ out of my own pocket, so my endorsement is mine alone, but if you have any interest in either (or both) I strongly recommend them. For mere shekels a month you can have access to HUGE back catalogues of footage accessible with a single click on a remote. And while I’ll no longer be writing about my journey I’m beyond stoked to continue watching along. I’ve done the research and can’t wait to see the various eras ahead: the pandemic no-fans events, the “end of an era” short-lived demise of ROH, then it’s rebirth at the hands and bankroll of Tony Khan, etc. I’m in for quite a treat. Thanks for looking and I encourage you to fully enjoy your own journeys, wherever they might take you.